title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

The Bad, The Ugly, The Good

I felt so miserable late yesterday afternoon.  Just exhausted, and I don't know why.  Plus a pain that came and went, in my lower left side.  I assumed of course, it was my pancreas, or perhaps a tumor in the lower left lobe of my lung, or even a heart issue.  I assume these things so that if it IS true, I am not taken by surprise.

I know you won't get that, but..........it's the way my brain works.  Assume the worse and it won't happen?  Assume the worse and if it does happen, I'm prepared?

I had stopped after my Chiropractor visit to stock up a few things for the upcoming "maybe" mega snowstorm.  No way am I going to be stuck in this house without Diet Pepsi, wet cat food, milk, candy bars and bologna for sandwiches.  Being near the end of the month, I had to use my food assistance--all $16.00 of it, the money on my Wal-Mart savings card AND $10.00 from my checking account.  I now have a balance of $17.00 and that ought to get me through.

John and Maizey stopped in and he scolded me for carrying in my six bags of groceries.

"You should have called me.  You shouldn't be carrying in that stuff with your bad shoulder!" 

:Well, you have a bad ankle and have to wear a "boot" on your foot, you shouldn't be carrying heavy loads either!"

"Yes, but my foot will heal.  You're going to the Chiropractor to help your shoulder and you're just making it worse."

"I'll be fine."

"You're just so stubborn!"

Sweet or controlling?  I haven't figured out which as yet.

So--I went to bed at 9:30, which is unheard of around here.  When I woke up at 8:30, I felt great.  No pain (other than in my neck).  So my pancreatic cancer/lung cancer/heart attack must have been gas?  Or just a normal small piece of gravel passing through my left kidney--which I DO have on occasion.
I've been worried about Pammie.  She has insurance through the State and she has to go to the doc once a year for a Healthy Wellness Check-up, which is good, or like her mother and brother, she'd never go.

The nurse practitioner there told Pam that she had a large fibroid tumor that was growing!!

Pam said, "Last year you told me it had shrunk.  Now it's growing?"

The nurse said, "yes", and sent Pam to a Gynecologist for an ultra sound and exam.

Pam was concerned, a little bit.  We talked about what could cause this thing to grow.  Too much caffeine?  Taking collagen pills for her wrinkles?  We Googled and searched.

I told her that after menopause, fibroids are suppose to shrink.  That I had them, but mine had calcified, instead of shrinking, thus giving me a "poochy" stomach.

Pam was worried because she cannot afford to lose any work to take time for a hysterectomy.  Plus, her insurance isn't good enough to pay for all of the surgery.

They can remove just the fibroid, but she would still have to take time off work.

Pammie called at 10:00 this morning.  

Yes, she has a uterine fibroid tumor.

No, it is not growing.  It has calcified and has been for many years.

The only thing that makes fibroids "grow" is estrogen and since Pam is not on estrogen and has gone through menopause, there is no problem.

The specialist asked her if her mother had ever had fibroids and Pam said, "Yes, and still does.  Calcified just like this one."

Doc says. "The tendency to have fibroid tumors in the uterus or the breasts is usually a genetic condition.  You can bet...if your Mom has them, you probably will too...and you do."

I am very happy.  I've been lugging mine around for the last 20 years and know there is nothing to worry about, but...I am so glad she had an  ultra sound (just like the one I requested 3 years ago), to just make sure there is nothing wrong with her ovaries, fallopian tubes and uterus.
Today was sunny and 48 degrees.  This afternoon, I opened up the front door to get all the sunshine possible in here.
When I turned around, I noticed that my big Beastie Boy, Buddy was napping in the basket where I keep my crochet/knitting projects.  He knows he's not supposed to be in there--we have talked about it on numerous occasions!  I do not need his gray fur shedding on my yarn!
Precious as he may be, and he IS precious, I lifted him out, put him on my lap and we had a "rocky-bye" for a few minutes.
We are expecting a rain/snow event tomorrow morning and then....either 3-5 inches of snow or 12+ inches of snow, like we had in November.  I am voting for the 12+.  I just hope it holds off so I have time to get to my Chiropractor at 2:30 and a much needed stop at Michael's for one skein of yarn!


  1. Buddy looks very pleased with himself!
    I'm really bad at "assuming" things too; however, I haven't been to a doctor, other than a dermatologist, in many years. I've been very blessed with good health.

  2. Scary 'what-if's for you and Pammie! Glad yours passed and Pammie's turned out to be OK. It worries me that I haven't contingency plans if I'm taken ill. Since I don't have family or long term care insurance, I should probably research homecare services, and keep a few phone numbers handy. Unlike you I don't want to think about it!

  3. I'm just the opposite as you are, Judy, I have my head in the sand about health aches and pains. In my head, they are never serious. I've had many, many fibroid tumors and cysts in my uterine and breasts so I don't worry about them either. But my doctor says cancer can hide around them so I still need to have them checked out.

    Cats have a niche for finding places you don't want them to sleep. Gotta love them.

  4. I can tell by Buddy's "ears of annoyance" that he did not appreciate being taken out of that basket! Thanks for the 12+ inches of snow wish..not! Have a little consideration for us poor people that have to be out in it!

  5. it probably won't help much but you aren't the only one struggling to find money to pay for groceries! ;) but hey things could always be worse is what I tell myself -perdido (didn't feel like logging in lol)

  6. Glad you are ready.....my brother, Marty, in Illinois, wrote me this afternoon about how bad the blizzard is. Heavy winds.
    Such a sweet picture of you and your sweet baby, Buddy.