...and someone else was napping under the couch!
I posted this on Face Book--you may have seen it.
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"It has been brought to my attention that my flippant, sarcastic way of speaking has caused misunderstandings and hurt, especially to people close to me. Apparently, when I make a sarcastic remark and then laugh, I cannot assume the person knows I am only kidding or teasing. I was raised in a family where sarcasm, flippant and teasing remarks were an everyday thing. We called it "humor" and at one time, I was praised for my quick wit. I am rarely serious about most things in life, so it will be difficult for me to change, but...change I must.
So, Dear Hearts, please bear with me through this life changing transition. (Geez Louise! Another sarcastic remark!)"
Perhaps today that would be called bullying?
"It has been brought to my attention that my flippant, sarcastic way of speaking has caused misunderstandings and hurt, especially to people close to me. Apparently, when I make a sarcastic remark and then laugh, I cannot assume the person knows I am only kidding or teasing. I was raised in a family where sarcasm, flippant and teasing remarks were an everyday thing. We called it "humor" and at one time, I was praised for my quick wit. I am rarely serious about most things in life, so it will be difficult for me to change, but...change I must.
So, Dear Hearts, please bear with me through this life changing transition. (Geez Louise! Another sarcastic remark!)"
My Daddy had a wicked wit and made many sarcastic comments--none of them hurt me because I knew he was kidding. All of their friends bantered back and forth like that. I was raised in that atmosphere. Then in school, everyone was like that. If someone stumbled a bit, we'd all call out, "How ya doing, Grace." Everyone laughed, including the kid who stumbled--many times the stumbler was me.LOL
Then a friend explained, in today's society, everyone is either texting, e-mailing, Tweeting, or making comments on Face Book. We no longer communicate in the conventional way--face-to-face. We don't see the person's facial expression, body language or hear the inflection in their voices.
Thus, a flippant or sarcastic remark could be taken at face value and deemed to be nasty or mean. Where it would normally be laughed at in a face-to-face chat.
Without facial expressions and body language it really is hard to convey humor, especially when we write. Makes you wish we could carry a lttle LOL sign around, doesn't it, to flash at the appropriate times. Sarcasm is the hardest type of humor of all to carry off because it really can be taken two ways and even the dictionary defines it as "cutting remarks." I think there is a better word to describe what you do, your kind of humor but at the moment I can't think what that would be and looking up synonyms for sarcasm didn't help! What kind of feed back did you get from your Facebook post?
ReplyDeleteAll positive, like, "Stay just as you are." Stuff like that, but of course, if they felt differently they probably wouldn't post a comment. :-)
DeleteYou are what you are! There are at LEAST 20 Types and Forms of Humor ... yours appears (to me, anyway) to be more anecdotal and self deprecating! Just like we use emoticons, I agree with Jean that you need to have several index cards with different kinds of smiley faces....just to be sure you are not misunderstood. PEOPLE! Loosen up a little! Methinks maybe what you say IS TRUE and they are embarrassed by it ... ???
ReplyDeleteAW is right! Self-deprecating was what I was searching for, and some people just can't take a joke and AW is probably right on the reason why.
DeleteMaggie is very sweet.... did she stay like that for long?
ReplyDeleteYes--a couple of hours anyway.
DeleteLove the kitty napping! :)
ReplyDeleteThat's an interesting thing to think about...the online communication versus being face to face!
Love the kitty napping! :)
ReplyDeleteThat's an interesting thing to think about...the online communication versus being face to face!
Too bad, really! There is a lot of humor in some things that people can't get past their own problems to see! It's ridiculous!
ReplyDeleteToo bad, really! There is a lot of humor in some things that people can't get past their own problems to see! It's ridiculous!
ReplyDeleteIf people can't take joke, more pity for them. I do believe though there is a difference in joking and sarcasm - or, more than likely I don't understand what they are. We used to laugh a lot; but, unfortunately we also have certain "looks" that we don't realize are offensive. And, I can't stand it when one of the girls say "Oh, I saw THAT look". Well, okay then! :0
ReplyDeletexoxo
P.S. Probably none of that made sense. LOL
Yes--it made a lot of sense.
DeleteI would say I find wit entertaining, that is, irony or self deprecating humor, in small doses. Like pepper. But I grew up among people who avoided sincere communication like the plague and couldn't say a honest feeling to save their life. Why be so insincere? Life is too short and hearts are better left tender than pummeled with insincerity.
ReplyDeleteSarcasm, even irony, has backfired when I've written it in my posts. But privately in my journal, where I do 99.9% of my writing? And gossiping? LOL