Proud, Happy, Fun, Sad Weekend

Saturday--Maddie's last ballet performance, most probably.

You aren't allowed to take pictures or video during the

performance, so, this being her last one and because

I AM GRAMMA JUDY

I took the first video of my life---and you can tell.

Little Susanna is the front row-far right, 

Maddie is front row, second from right.

All was going quite well, until Gramma's hand started shaking

Sorry!!

"Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)"

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

No visitor's are allowed in the dressing rooms, but, I wanted to get a photo of Susanna and Maddie in their costume's.  I peeked in and a chorus of, "GRAMMA JUDY--COME IN" rang out.  A dozen girls waving me in.  I don't even know most of them, but because, I AM GRAMMA JUDY, I went right in.  (I later asked Maddie how all those girls know me and she said, "Because you come to all our ballet performances, and you comment on Face Book...and they all know, Gramma Judy."

Quite an emotional afternoon, with another "last time" thingie.  I remember her when she was a tiny, blonde, five-year-old, just starting to learn the "positions".  ...and now, here we are--thirteen years later.......

Susanna has been accepted HERE .  She is a wonderful, very talented dancer.  I've watched her dance since she was seven--she and Maddie were little mice in their first Nutcracker Ballet.

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Sunday:

Baccalaureate was at 2:00 at a large church across from the school.  A Nazarene Church.  Now, when I was younger, the Nazarene Church was a scary place to me.  No make-up allowed.  No jewelry.  Times have changed.  People attending in their pedal pushers and blue jeans--WHICH--personally I think is not appropriate!!!  

I wanted to wear a dress.  Had my panty hose and slip on and the dress, which is quite big on me now.  Then, I pulled my two pair of white dress shoes out of the closet.  I haven't worn either pair in 12 years and, they are about a size too small now and they hurt like heck.  So--I pulled on my new pair of white dress pants and a top my sister gave me 12 years ago--which is also large on me, but...............  I even put on some colored moisturizer and MASCARA!!!  Which was a real big mistake when they sang, the song above, "Oceans", "Amazing Grace" and this one: The Prayer Song 

 At the end of the service, Karen advised me that my mascara was all black under my eyes and I advised her that her eyes were all red, also from crying.  If Karen hadn't cried and practically sobbed, I think I would have been okay.
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Another weird and wonderful thing happened at the beginning, as people were filing in.  Karen was talking to the family in front of us.  Their Dad was playing the piano and...he was playing "Take My Hand Precious Lord."  I want that song played and sung at my funeral and have never been able to figure out who to have do it.  Come to find out, the mother and both older sisters are wonderful singers.  So--I just leaned forward and told her and she handed me a business card.

Afterwards, I met the Dad and he and I talked.  He knows where Byron is so he said, "We won't have a problem getting lost on the way to the church."

"That's wonderful, I said.  "I am really serious about this!"

"When do you think you will need us.  Should I put it on my calendar?"

"Oh--I don't know for sure.  Maybe this week...maybe twenty years from now.  Just don't forget."

"Okay.  Have Karen call us and we will be there."

Now, you all might think this is completely weird, but you know how I have everything planned and organized and this one particular thing had bothered me.  Now, I can put that card in my "funeral box" and I will have my song played and sung!!!  YAY!!!
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... and of course, my precious boy!!!

When he gave his talk today, every time he moved his head, his tassel 

got caught behind his 

sticking out ears.  I loved it!!!

<by the way--Matt and Maddie are just friends>  <Sigh>

All the kids speeches were about their wonderful future.  I remember those kinds of speeches at my own graduation--57 years ago.  Has any of your lives turned out like you thought it would on your graduation day?

I never thought I'd end up divorced, living in a trailer and getting help from the Welfare system.

I won't tell any of these kids anything negative about the future.  They go forth with so many choices, so many opportunities--much more fortunate than we were at that age.  Perhaps they will have wonderful, happy and fulfilled lives.

That was part of my prayer for them today.