Where Do I Begin?

I have had a hellacious week!!!

Today has been the worst!

I took Pearl with me when I took in my computer on Monday morning.  We both ended up getting new computers--mine to replace an old computer that had no more memory or room to install Windows 7 and hers, to get her back on-line with a SIMPLE computer she can enjoy(?).

Tuesday--we went back to pick up our new toys.  Then, we spent half the way running around buying her speakers, mouse, keyboard, and trying to find a monitor.

Wal-Mart= Monitors were 95$--apparently they only make 20" ones now?  As I was gathering up her necessary amendments for her computer, she was in the housewares department looking at sale items.

Meijer's = no monitors.  They sell everything you would need for a computer EXCEPT monitors AND computers.  As I was in the electronics department, she was in housewares again, looking for sale items.  She found a plastic pitcher, which she got because, "It's only a dollar!"  Which turned out to be $5.00 at check-out because she read the sign incorrectly, which turned into an argument with the cashier, which turned into Judy running back to housewares, finding the REAL price, which turned into Pearl leaving the plastic pitcher at the store.

Another Wal-Mart, 15 miles away from the first.  I made her sit in the car while I ran in and looked.  No smaller monitors.

Then a stop at the bank so Pearl could transfer funds over to her checking account so her check wouldn't bounce.  She was suppose to do that on Monday, but had forgotten.

"I'm thirsty.  You gotta stop and get me something to drink!"

"Okay.  Where do you want me to stop?"

"I don't care."

I pull into McDonald's

"Not here!  I hate McDonald's!"
<dear Lord in Heaven>

I pull back out into traffic, go half a block and turn into Taco Bell."

"I don't want any food...just a Coke."

"They sell Coke products at McDonald's"

"I told you!  I hate McDonald's and they aren't getting any of my money!"

"Not even for a drink?"

"No!"

Up to the speaker phone.  "Welcome to Taco Bell...may I take your order?"

"I'd like a medium Coke, please."

Pearl says, "Wait.  Maybe I want something different."

Me,"Ah--wait just a moment please."
<I watch as Pearl pours over the menu--cars stacking up behind us>

"I want a small Diet Coke."

"We'd like a small Diet Coke, please."

"Is that all?"

'Yes."

"Is the screen showing the correct item?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Please pull up to the second window."

"Thank you."
<I can feel the pounding in the top of my head which leads me to believe, I am about to have a stroke!>

Back home, which led to unloading all her toys and hooking up the computer, with amendments--except for the speakers as she has a $4.00 power strip with 4 outlet plugs!!  She had thrown out ALL her computer components when she threw (literally) out her old computer, so, she had no power cord for the computer, which led---back to Wal-Mart.

I finally got home and got my computer hooked up and played a bit with Windows 7, which came loaded with Outlook (e-mail) 2010, which would not configure with my ISP.

While I was on the computer, I went searching for monitors.  They all were $95 at the cheapest and then...I just happened to go on the Best Buy site, which I never use and there was a nice, HD, Back Lit, 20" widescreen monitor.  Regularly $149.00 on sale, with pick-up in the store for $87.00.  Bought it!!

Wednesday=up to Best Buy to pick up her monitor.  Then stopped at Pearls to load all her games off her discs so she could play UNTIL I can get her set up on-line, so she can access FACE BOOK, in which she had FOUR accounts and cannot remember her username or password!

I called Comcast to help get my new e-mail configured--talked to 3 people who assured me it would be fixed and to expect a return phone call in 1-2 hours.  Waited--nothing.

Then realized--my home phone was not working.

9:20 last night--Got on-line with Comcast in a live TYPED chat with a tech--I can understand them better with the written word better than I can verbally, if you get my drift!!!  CAN NO ONE SPEAK ENGLISH WITHOUT A HEAVY EAST INDIAN ACCENT?

Got it configured by 10:15.
================

Thursday 9:00 a.m.= a phone call from Pearl that she could not access her games because it says, "I have to go on-line and I'm not hooked up yet."
<what?  the games came off discs I loaded>

Take out garbage--up to Pearls.

As I am walking back to the computer, she is following along saying, "You know.  This is Pearl's house and Pearl's computer and you know, when I sit down in front of the computer, it sees me and won't work.  Remember before?"

I have her set up to one click any icon.
I have the resolution set up so the icons are larger.

I have all of five damn icons on her desk top!  4 for each of the games she likes and one for Face Book that will work WHEN I GET HER ON-LINE.

"Sit down and show me which game you want to play."

"What do you mean...which game?"
<sigh>

"Let's play Bejeweled.  Click on the icon to play that game."

She clicks on the damn Face Book icon!!!
<I can feel the heat rising in my throat--breathe>

"That's your Face Book icon.  You aren't set up for Face Book yet."

"Well, that's where the games are."

"No.  Look at the icons.  See those four?  Bejeweled, Temple Quest..those are the games we loaded yesterday.  Click on the Bejeweled one."

She does.  Up comes the FREAKING GAME!

"See!  You can do it, but it wouldn't let me!"
<GOOD GRIEF!>

"Whadda you mean?  You just clicked on it and it came up for you!"

"Yeah--because you're here!"

"Okay--I gotta get home and call Consumers Energy.  They still don't have my bill straightened out...since February."

Back home, I called Consumers Energy and was assured, ONCE AGAIN, that the charges would be looked into the Appliance Service Plan taken off and to just send in my budget payment--this after I had talked to 5 different people.  They are billing me each and every month for the ASP which was canceled February 20th.

"So--if the charges show up next month...again...I should just call back, right?"  I asked.

"Yes."

"Like I have for the last five months?"

"Yes...and thank you for being a Consumers Energy customer."
==================
Then, I looked around on the new 2010 Outlook--now called Microsoft Mail--which I HATE--and I have no contacts list, no saved e-mails--like the last e-mail I got from my BFF two days before she died--all my info for paying my bills on-line.  Gone.  PANIC.

Then I go looking for my 40 years of genealogy records on Family Tree Maker and can't find that.  PANIC!!

I called the computer shop and was assured (that damn word again), that it was not lost, they would get it and put it all on this computer.  I have a remote set up with them, so they can come into my computer and set things up.

He would call back at 11:00 and fix it.
=================
No call by 2:00, so up to Pearl's I go to get her hooked up to the Internet.

I called Comcast and almost fainted when I got an English speaking woman--she had a slight southern drawl, but SHE WAS AN AMERICAN!!!

The computer sits right by the modem and she told me to put the telephone jack looking thingie connect into the Ethernet slot on the Modem and hook the other end into the computer.  Unfortunately--Pearl said she didn't have one.

"You have a whole bag of different "cords"--where is it?"

and lo and behold in that bag, was a nice bright blue connection cord.

Badda Boom, Badda Bing--connected!!!!!!!

I could not believe how simple it was AND I should have figured it out yesterday on my own, but...sometimes, I am a lot like Pearl and afraid to mess up electronic things.

Then I got her hooked up to her bank with an icon on her desktop--thank goodness I remembered her user name and password from a year ago.

Then I got her on Face Book.  Remember, she had 4 different accounts, set up by her daughter and her daughter's boyfriend and NONE OF THEM could remember the user names or passwords?

Now--while I am doing this and trying to concentrate, she is trying to show me pictures she just found in an envelope--THAT I HAVE SEEN HALF A DOZEN TIMES BEFORE...and gets a bit angry because I won't look or talk to her.

"Well!  If you won't talk to me, I'm going out to the living room!"

"I'm sorry.  I can't talk.  I am trying to figure this out and I have to concentrate.  You got any Diet Pepsi--I'm thirsty."

She goes off to get my drink and I step out on the back porch and have half a REAL cigarette.

Back in the bedroom---

I had an idea and put in her old e-mail address, when she had ATT and  Badda Boom, Badda Bing--there was her account, all her friends--the whole schmeer!!!

"Wait until I tell Margie," she says. (Her daughter.)

"Tell Marge to go in there and delete those other accounts.  I'll change your e-mail to your new one later."

Then, she wanted a couple more games loaded and so....I made her sit in front of the computer/monitor and do it herself.  

"Where do I put this diskie in?"

"Oh--in the CD/DVD tray."

"Where's that?"

"On the front of the computer.  Look for it."

"I can't find it."

"You didn't even look."

She bent down a bit..."What happens if I push this button?"

"I don't know.  Try it."

"What if I break something?"

"You can't."

Lo and behold--

When I left at 5:00, she was happily playing Pearl's Peril on Face Book.

They are taking me out for supper tomorrow night.  I think I might just order Lobster AND steak!  <kidding>

My E.T. (essential tremor) has really been bad today--nerves I suppose.  Here I am, trying to move a mouse around a monitor screen and click on appropriate boxes with a shaking right hand that sends the cursor to the top of the page.  ARGGH!!

I had forgotten to mention that Dar came over every evening this week to...geez, I can't remember why right now.

I am going to take an Ativan and go to bed.

Meeting with an attorney in the morning.  I am sure there is going to be more stress with that!!