Friends and Advice and Circuses

I have wonderful friends--some I see on a regular basis.  Some I see every day, like Pearl.

I have a beautiful friend named Christine.  She's almost young enough to be my kid! She lived with me for about nine months, right after my divorce.  We both were in a mentally, traumatic state of affairs and we'd have these long, late night, involved conversations--which ended up helping as much or more than the counseling we were both getting at the Mental Health place.

Then, Chrissy needed to move on to start her "real" life.  I took her to the bus station and off she went--so far away.  I cried for days and days.  I was and still am closer to her than any of my daughter's.  Probably because we AREN'T related? LOL.

I got to visit with Chris for a few hours, when Fred and I stopped in Virginia on our way to the Outer Banks.  Then, she and her Army hubby, went off to Germany and then Italy.  Now, Chris is back state-side and has me helping her market and sell the books she writes.  I know she could do this herself, but she uses my help as a pretense to pay me for every hour I research for her.

She even sent me "never to be paid back" money to pay for my furnace!!!

Do any of my own children do that for me?  Well no--the only one who could afford it, can't really afford that kind of help anymore because of her own situation.
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Then, there is another friend.  I have never met her.  I started reading her blog many years ago, and she started reading mine and..........what can I say.  This woman doesn't have a perfect life, but she does have a perfect love for others.  I have written about her on my blog and once again, Melissa Geiger, has blessed me.

Last week I received four gift cards from her.  One to the Rich People's store so I can go and buy my favorite salads from their deli.  Three from Subway--just up the road, where I can get a foot-long sub that will last me two meals!!!
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What can you do for people like this?  How can you re-pay them?  There is no way.  The only way I know how, is to make sure every night, when I say my prayers and ask for God's blessing on my OWN family members, these two women are included.

There are always new people that I add to my prayer list everyday-like Marla who had to put her beloved dog Bella to sleep, and Marcia who is in the process of having to move from her home, and of course, any of my other blog friends who are ill or family members of theirs facing surgery or troubles in their lives.

It doesn't seem enough and yet---to my way of thinking, prayer is very powerful and....perhaps that is the very best to pay back my friends for their constant love and helpfulness.
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I decided that in MY circus, one of my monkey's had to be trained!  So--when Dar came over yesterday, I took it upon myself to show her the pictures I had taken of her tight pants and the resulting "look" she has from a back view.

"I have joined Weight Watchers!"

"Great."

"But it is all on-line so you will have to come over and show me how to do it."
<I will HAVE to?>

"Okay.  I don't know anything about it, but we can probably figure it out."

"Oh...I've got to lose weight!"

"Ah--there is something I need to discuss with you.  I have been thinking about it all day yesterday and...I don't know quite how to bring it up.  I don't want you to be upset or angry with me."

"What?  You can tell me anything."

I came into the computer room and got the picture I had taken of her back-side."

"I was taking pictures of the construction going on across the street and you came into view and I took this."

and I handed her the picture.

"OH MY GOD!!!  Look at that!  OH MY GOD!! That's what I look at from behind?"

"I think you need to quit wearing bikini style underpants and wear a brief style and...beige in color."

"Beige?"

"Yes...Beige won't show under light colored pants."

"OH MY GOD!!!  You can even see my.... my crack!"

"See how the bikini style goes up--across the center of your bottom and leaves the rest hanging out.  It just accentuates your hips."

"OH MY GOD!!!  I went to work and looked like that all day yesterday?"

"I guess.  A brief style would look a lot better, but....I think you need to get a larger size work pants too."

"OH...and you say Beige color will help?"

"Yep.  Back in 1977, I was looking for a dress to wear to Pam's wedding.  I had on white under wear and the sales clerk advised me to always wear Beige underwear, as it won't show through anything.  I haven't worn any other color since--well, I did wear black, or wine color, but only under very dark clothes."

"Show me."

So I bent over, pulled my white shorts really tight around my hips.  "Can  you see my panty line?"

"No."

"Okay then."

"Oh--I am so happy you pointed this out to me.  OH MY GOD!!!  I'm going to the store right now and buy some Beige underpants.  You said get them in a brief style?"

"Yes."

"I don't know.  I have always worn Bikini style."

"You're seventy-two years old.  You're too old to wear Bikini style anything!"
<and off she went>

Whew.
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Pearl came down and she got to talking about bras.

"I don't look good in any of my tops anymore.  My boobs hang way down...even if I stand up real straight...which I don't usually anymore.  I stand stooped over."

"Maybe you need to get a light back brace to hold your posture straighter."

"Oh no.  I had one.  Can't stand it."

"Maybe you need to get an all-in-one body shaper."

"You mean...like a corset?"

"No--they make them nice and soft, but with a little bit of Lycra that holds you in...here and there...and keeps your boobs in the right place."

"Well--I'm not wearing one of those!  How do you go potty in them?"

"They have a snap crotch."

"Sometimes, I wait too long and don't get to the bathroom in time...so...that wouldn't work."

"Get a better bra."

"Sometimes I don't even wear one."

"I've noticed.  Where do you buy your bras?"

"Usually Wal-Mart.  I get the white, cotton ones."

"Ah.  Years ago, a dear friend of mine (Bethie) recommended Bali bras with the bow on the front.  I get the underwire ones, in Beige."

"Oh.  I can't wear an underwire."

"Have you ever tried?"

"No, but I know it would be uncomfortable."

"Mine aren't."

"How much do they cost?"

"Oh--around thirty bucks.  I have two.  One in the drawer and one on."

"Good grief!!  I'm not spending that kind of money on a bra!"

"Okay.  It's just a way to look better."

Then, I sang her my song:

"Do your boobs hang low,
Do they wobble to and fro.
Can  you tie them in a knot,
Can you tie them in a bow.
Can you throw them over your shoulder,
Like a Continental soldier,
Do your boobs hang low."

 and she laughed and then went on to tell me, she is ordering  <as seen on TV> The Digital Power Pressure Cooker--for ONLY 3 easy payments of $33.33, <plus shipping and handling>.  It makes enough food for an army, AND you can, can vegetables in it.

"Isn't it kind of big for just the two of you?"

"Oh, I can make meals and then freeze them."

"You don't have a garden...are you going to can with it?"

"Oh, we can go to the Farmer's Market and get lots of fresh vegetables."

"I thought, the last time you went to the Farmer's Market, you said you couldn't do it anymore because you can't walk around it."
<silence>

"Well...I already ordered it and hopefully....it will come while Merle is at work!"

and, within a month, it will reside in their storage unit along with the "123 Go Ready Express" and the ice cream maker and the special waffle maker and the My Pillow that kills her neck to sleep on.  <sigh>
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Then it occurred to me--both Dar and Pearl grew up with no Mother in the house.  Neither one of them has a sister--Pearl was an only child.  Dar, the youngest with 3 older brothers.  That very well good be why Pearl buys stuff to make up for her empty feelings and Dar doesn't know how to dress herself?
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I love Zinnias.  They are such a simple, easy to grow flower.  Unpretentious.  I grew them in the raised bed on the west side of my shed.  I cut them and bring them in the house, just to make a cute little bouquet for my chair side table.  

I gave this little bunch to Pearl--she loved it.

She said she wanted to keep the jar.  I said no.
"But, it's my favorite color," she wailed.
"Mine too," I replied.