Sad, Wonderful, Laughing, Amazing Day

Today's weather?

Just like yesterday and the past week

PERFECT!

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Today was the Memorial Service for Bethie's oldest son, Todd, who died April 15th.  They attended his funeral over in the Czech Republic where he lived and today, was his service for his American family and friends.  It has taken a long time to get his cremains back here--State Department and customs releases and all that.

When I got up, I changed my mind about what to wear.  I knew that all our friends would probably wear pants, but...deep in my heart, I wanted to dress up...to honor Bethie and her husband, and Todd. I have known Bethie for 70 years, so I have known Todd since he was born.

I got out my black pin-stripe dress with the jacket.  This one that I last wore to my step-mother's funeral.

It's comfortable and it has the jacket to cover up my ugly looking arms.  I got my panty-hose on to cover up my ugly legs and my black dress shoes, that are badly worn around the edges.    Let's face it, I only wear a dress and heels on rare occasions.  The heels are from my working days--15 years ago, as is the dress.

I had to stop on my way to gas up the car.  It was only when I walked back to the car, from paying, that I realized the waist band on my panty-hose was so stretched out that it had fallen down around my crotch!!!  Too late to go back home and change for sure.  Onward and upward--ever forward.

I had to drive the expressway--north up to Fenton.  I "thought" that map-quest told me to turn left when I got off the exit--which I did and drove and drove, until I got to the next town and realized, that I was heading the wrong way--turn around and go back and found it--just a little ways RIGHT off the exit.

I entered the funeral home and immediately found the ladies room, as the waist of the panty hose was now down around my thighs.  I pulled up the waist band and tucked into my underpants.

Todd was only 53 when he had one of those heart explosions that occurs and by the time he landed on the floor, he was gone.  He had lived such a life!!!  He crammed more into the last 30 years than any of us will, if we live to be 100.    When he was just out of college, he asked Bethie to take him up to the entrance ramp of the expressway and drop him off.  He was going to back-pack around the United States--which he did.  Then, he went over to the Czech Republic to teach and ended up translating many, many of their  historical books into English.  Along the way, he met a lady with two daughter's.  He and she renovated an old house and an old store and started a business.

In the meantime, he became interested in singing with one of the famous choirs over there and was the first foreign person ever invited to join the group.  At his funeral in the Czech Republic--a couple of the choirs were there to sing.  His funeral held in a HUGE, old Cathedral.

The service today was beautiful, moving and very spiritual.  Bethie's niece is a minister and gave such a beautiful service.  Bethie's brother also took part.  They had a piano/flute duet and then an older gentleman, with a trained (I presume) baritone voice stood and sang "How Great Thou Art".

All of our Gal Pals were there, along with their husbands, and another classmate.  It seems the only times we get all together anymore, is at funerals.

I was amazed that when I first arrived, Bethie's younger son came up to me and said, "Remember me, Mrs. Miller?"  I haven't seen him in probably 40 years and yet, he knew me.  He went on to reminisce, "Wasn't it one of your daughter's that Todd had a crush on?"

"Yes, my daughter, Karen."

"Didn't they go out on a date, once."

"Yes...when they both were at Michigan State."

Now--how and why would he remember that?  Way back in 1980?  Amazing.

Then Bethie's younger brother came up and hugged me and said, "Judy, thank you so much for coming."  I haven't seen him in over 50 years!  I am stunned and amazed again.  How did he remember me?

Then I introduced myself to Bethie's two grandsons, that I have never met, and tried to guess their names by the way Bethie has talked about them.  I got their names wrong--Doug, who I thought was Jacob.  HAH, such nice young men, we had a great talk.

The biggest surprise?  Bethie's nephew, that I haven't seen since Beth and Harry's wedding in 1960, came over and said, "I was in love with you in 1956."

He did look familiar, but....."I don't recognize you," I said.

"Roger."

"OHMYGOSH!!  Roger?"

His family lived next to my in-laws back then.

"I kept kicking my football over into their yard, hoping you would get it and bring it back to me and talk to me.  I had such a crush on you!"

"But...Roger...you were only ten or eleven.  I thought of you as a little kid.  A cute little kid, but way too young for me.  What year did you graduated high school?"

"1968."

"Oh," I said.  "Well--I have to tell you.  I lived for twelve years with a guy who graduated in 1968, so...I guess you aren't too young for me!"

He hugged me and said, "Okay then", and we laughed and laughed and his wife said, "Am I going to have to watch you two?"

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This happens to be all the time--people I haven't seen in decades recognize me.  I figured it out once.  In high school, I was tall and skinny and blond.  I am still tall, having only lost 1/4 inch since high school, and I am once again thin and, even though my hair is now grey, it is still cut short, like I always wore it.  So--I tend to still look the same as they remember.  Even though I don't remember them--perhaps because a lot of them were kids when I last saw them.  It's cool!

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Bethie had invited all us friends to the family dinner afterwards.  It was held in a church that is a few miles from her house.  I was going to take the back way, but then, decided perhaps I should get back on the expressway and take that back south.

I distinctly saw the sign that said, 'US 23, SOUTH" and that's where I took the entrance, only to realize in a few seconds, before I even got on the expressway, that I was headed north--toward Flint!  EGADS!!!

Up to the next exit--turned left, over the expressway and entered onto the expressway, headed south.  I was afraid I would be late, but got there in plenty of time.  Sought out the nearest ladies room again, to haul up my panty-hose, down to the basement and sat down.  I was not going to move!!

But, of course, it was a buffet and we had to line up and walk to the tables of food.  I took my left hand and pinched the panty-hose, waist through my dress to hold them up.  One of our Gal Pals, standing behind me in line asked if I had a pain in my side.  I quietly told her the problem I had.  Which of course, she had to relate back to the other Gal Pals--as we share everything (I guess)...and of course the husband's heard.  Well--in high school, I was thought of as the class clown, so....the reputation continues, right? 

Then I wondered...how was I too load up my food plates?  I had to let go of the panty-hose and by the time I got back to our table, I could feel the waist line flapping against my thighs!  Thank goodness, only the body of the hose were stretched out--the thigh part and legs stayed up nicely.  I did not go back for dessert, by the way.  I was not taking any more chances.

As I left--I walked out of the church and into the sunlight and then realized--for the first time in 15 years, my black pin-stripe ensemble is NAVY BLUE!!!

I turned to one of the Gal Pals, who was walking out with me, hoping to witness a complete panty-hose fail where they would end up around my ankles, and I said, "Is this outfit black or navy blue?"

"It's navy,"she replied.

"I have had it forever and I have always thought it was black!"

"You're getting old, Jude.  Maybe you better get your eyes checked!"

I got in my car and said, right out loud, "If I'd known that. I would have worn my navy shoes!"

My navy shoes are in much better shape.  GEEZ LOUISE!!!

I took the alternate route home so I didn't have to get out on the expressway and drive fast with all the other idiots!  Got in the door, kicked off my shoes, pulled off the panty-hose as I walked back to the bedroom and threw them--quite violently--into the kitchen wastebasket!!!

Next funeral, I will wear the same outfit, but a smaller size of panty-hose and my navy shoes!!  In fact, I think I will put a note on the jacket saying, "This is navy, not black"==just in case the next funeral is mine and my girls will know how to accessorize my outfit!!!

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Tonight, I am thinking of my Dear Friend, Beth.  She is worn out, I know.  She has already attended one funeral for her son and then....the long wait.  When she should have been on her way through the grief process and today---she had to go through it all again.  Later this afternoon, they were to take Todd's remains up to the Byron Cemetery, where he will be finally, laid to rest, next to the rest of his family.  

The next time I drive up to The Farm, I will stop in at the cemetery and say a prayer by his grave.  Tonight, I am saying prayers for Beth and Harry and Tom, their son, and all of Todd's family, especially his lovely wife who has to travel back to the Czech Republic, all alone.