title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

It was a fine day---yesterday

This is the Noah's Ark stamped cross stitch kit I want.  So if you see it anywhere, please let me know.
Right now, it's $38.50 on jet.com and I would rather pay in the 20-25 dollar range.

Remember me telling you about the genealogy I did for the young lady named Sam?  A freebie because I knew she couldn't afford any of it.

I dated her Dad when I first moved here.  I don't know why.  He and I had polar opposite lifestyles.   He went to bed at 4:00am and got up at 2:00pm.  He sat at his computer 10 hours a day.

When I went to spend weekends, I sat and cross stitched or crocheted and watched TV, while he sat, with his back to me and computed.  He had two bulletin boards he ran on the computer, so he was involved in conversations.

At midnight, he'd get ready to go to the bar for his nightly drink and then have breakfast afterwards.  I went with him--why?  I didn't drink, but they had Karoke and I loved listening to Karoke.  Some of those singers were waaaaaaaay good.

Every other weekend, his 10 year old daughter Samantha, came to visit him.  The poor kid sat in her room all day and watched TV--waiting for Dad to wake up at 2:00 and take her out for lunch.

That became my role.  I'd take her to breakfast and shopping, or to the park--sometimes I even brought her home with me for the weekend and we'd go to Karen or Jennifer's where she could play with the babies.

That little girl was rather strange.  She had no table manners, laying her head on her arm, while she scooped the food off the plate into her mouth--with her fingers.

No matter what, she never, ever said Please or Thank You.

I tried my best, not in a nagging way, but by example and having her visit my grandkids, to learn to act properly.  I got her Dad, who never had been to the Mackinaw Bridge to take us up for a weekend.  We spent 4 days in the Upper Peninsula and had a great time.  Then I made a memory book of the photos for Sam.  Once, while shopping, she saw a book about manners for young kids.  She wanted it, so I got it for her.

That Sunday afternoon, when we took Sam home and toted her stuff inside, she showed her mother the book.  Some of her mother's friends were there and I felt uncomfortable as it was.

Her mother looked at the book and threw it at me.  "My girl don't need no book 'bout manners!"  I picked it up off the floor and retreated to the truck.  Sam would just have the book at her Dad's to read, I guess.

Her Mother hated me!  She was 36 when Sam was born, Sam's Dad was 50.  They never married or even lived together.  He really was never sure Sam was his, but he sent child support and had her in his Will.

The only thing I missed about that relationship when he ended it, was not seeing Sam.

Okay, so here we are 12 years later.  Sam's mother died January 7th.  They couldn't afford a funeral and they had to have the money up front, so it took that long to have a visitation.  2 hours at the funeral home, no funeral, private family burial, dark brown wooden casket.

I decided to drive in to the funeral home.  It was only a 20 minute drive.  I walked in and stood kind of at the back and she must have seen me and she came right over and walked right into my arms!  This amazed me because the 2 years I knew her, she hated to be hugged.

Then she pulled back a little bit and said, "Chris, Judy's here." and a handsome young came hurrying over and grabbed me in a bear hug.  Apparently she had mentioned something about me to him, her husband, over the years.  I got to meet her two little girls, the 4 year-old, reached out to shake my hand.  "I heered 'bout you from my Momma."  Hm-mm.  Then I heard someone squeal, "Judy!" and Sam's BFF since kindergarten came rushing over and we were in a huge three-way hug.  She had spent some of those weekends with us.  Now they are 24 with babies of their own, instead of the dolls we used to play with.

Sam had to greet other people so I went to sit down and then---in the back corner, I spotted people I knew.  Sam's Dad's siblings!  His sister came running up to me and led me back to the group.  These are some of the nicest people I have ever known and thought of them as part of my family for those 2 years he and I dated.  I got to meet a new sister-in-law, as one of the brother's had been a widower.

"Judy, I've heard so much about you!  Annie showed me that beautiful Dream Fairy picture you cross stitched for her.  It is beautiful.  You are just awesome!"

Okay, so I could have spent all afternoon with that group. LOL
As I started to leave I wanted to say good-bye to Sam and give her some money, so I asked if she could step out in the hall for a moment.  I hugged her long and hard and she sort of melted into my arms.  I said, "Give me your paw, Little One."  and I tucked a hundred dollar into her palm..."Just in case," I said.  "Just in case."

She didn't say Thank You--I didn't expect it, but she did say, "Would you make one of those family things for Chris?  I want to give it to his mother for her birthday."  That was the first she even mentioned the genealogy I had done.  I hadn't heard if she had received it not.

"Sure," I said.  "Just e-mail me his parent's name and grand parents, if you know the information."

"Okay.  I will."  We hugged again.

"Bye, bye Sam,  I love you.

"Bye", she said.

When I got in my car and started home, I realized---I hadn't even gone up to look into the casket.  Oh well--that wasn't why I had gone there yesterday anyway.
10:30 Wednesday night--I just received this e-mail from Pammie:
"Just got the greatest call from Cindy regarding Marks  test results. PSA is at 5...which is good. All scans came back good. Cancer is-in docs words "at bay"

Praise be to God!!!"
Indeed!  Praise be to God.


  1. Heartwarming story of your impact on Sam's life. We just never know when our kindness makes a real difference in someone's life.

    They must be getting very good at treating cancer these days. Your son is the third person I've heard about who is in remission, including my brother and my husband's best friend. Great news all the way around!

  2. They did a bit of genetic testing on Mark and then put together the meds that they thought would be the best. His PSA is now down to 5, which is real good--he started with it at 12. His scans all came back good. It seems like a lot of cancers nowadays--while not ever curable--are sort of like high blood pressure or heart disease. You take the meds and try and maintain. He still takes the pills and has an injection once every 3 months and that seems to maintain the growth of the cancer cells. He also uses a lot of cannabis, in its many forms. :-)

  3. It's amazing how much of an impact can be made on a child if you can spend only a short part of their childhood with them. The news about your son is the best. I'm so glad for you and him.

  4. Yes! It most certainly was, a good day.

    One of those days, to savor. :-)

    Gentle hugs,
    Luna Crone

  5. i found this one:


    it's a little different and 40 bucks.

  6. this is a sweet story judy, to have had such a profound impact on this girls life. it's what we all hope for. i think crafts are an awesome way to do this, something that is a constant reminder to people of how much you loved them. and it's an item that will be in a family for generations to come. i hope you have been signing and dating them!!

  7. Such wonderful news Judy about Mark. I feel very blessed that so far my brother is still clear from his cancer.

    Your relationship with Sam reminds me so much of what I had with two stepdaughters. Although their dad turned out to be not such a good husband, I loved getting to know the girls. The oldest was the same age as Patti, they spent a lot of time with us even when their dad traveling. However, the youngest got pregnant and had a baby girl when she was 14. Thank God, seriously, she rebuffed her mom about aborting, as Wendy and her daughter grew up together and are the very best of friends. Why did I just write all that!? It's funny how we read each other's blogs that ring a bell with our own experiences. Sorry for rattling on.
    Love you and you sharing with us.

  8. Wonderful news about your son. You really did have an impact on that young girl's life she likely really came to appreciate when she became older, especially when she became a mother, too.

  9. Such happy news about Mark!! Happy for all of you!

    Interesting story about Sam. She may never say Thank you, but there is no doubt about the love she has for the small role (actually a huge role) you've played in her life. Sweet!

  10. all good news. so happy for you!