title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Life As It Is on Lakeview Lane.

Earlier this year, knowing that we were going to have a Class reunion coming up next year, I started renewing addresses, making sure I had every one's, and putting together some thoughts about the reunion.  I put it in file marked, "2017 Class Reunion" and--I forgot about it.  

Our class is really good about having reunions--5 yrs, 10-15-20-25, on and on and a really big one for our 50th.  I have been the one in charge of arranging it, getting the invites sent out, getting the reservation count, on and on.  For our 50th, I made a really nice book with a page for each classmate--with their "now" photo.  Then I made badges for everyone with their Senior picture on it for them to wear, helping us all to recognize each other.

We had a really good attendance that year, with the "kids" coming from all over the US.

At one of our classmates lunches, early this spring, two of the ladies made an announcement that our class and the class the year ahead of us were going to have a joint reunion.  The reason being, "because so many of us married each other, and we will have a bigger crowd."

At the time, my mind slipped off to count the "so many of us" who had married each other.  3 came to mind.  

Then I heard them discussing where it was going to be.  A real fancy banquet hall, that would cost a goodly amount to rent, with the food catered.  On August 27th, from 5:00 - 8:00.

Thankfully, I wasn't in charge, other than to make-up and mail our the invitations.  My mind slipped away from the conversation again to think of who would attend.  

Did they actually think that Jim was going to fly in from California for a 3 hour get together?  Was Bev going to drive up from Tennessee?  Were Larry and Mary, Sam and Joe going to fly or drive all the way up here from Florida for a 3 hour get together?

I kept my mouth shut!  "Sure--I'd love to make and mail the invitations."  I said and I would and I did.

One of the ladies called me yesterday.  "So far we have 18 from our class and 15 from theirs.  That includes spouses."

WOW!  That number alone won't even pay for the banquet hall rental, I don't think.

People our age and the other class a year ahead of us, are not going to drive from all over, even Michigan, for a 3-hour get together, that ends at 8:00 and they will be driving home in the dark.  So, we basically are having our usual Old Gal Pals get together, with husbands, if they want to come, but we are having it for supper instead of lunch.

Plus, they wanted me to make up a list of our deceased classmates, which I did and put it on card stock with a black border around it to sit on the picture table, for everyone to look at, but now---they want one of the girls to read off the names and dates.  What a lovely downer--don't you think?

Now--if it had been up to me, there is a restaurant where we sometimes meet for lunch that has a large room off to one side.  The room would easily hold 75-100 people.  I would have asked to set up part of this room for us and when we all got there, we could just have ordered off the regular menu.  Cheaper than the $25.00 it is going to cost each of us and we wouldn't have had to pay rent on that room.  

Other diners could be on the other side enjoying their meals, although most regular people wouldn't be in there at that time of day and there is another large dining area with booths,  and we on one side==kind of like a big family get together.  I would have had us meet earlier for chit-chat (4-4:30) and order around 5:30-6:00) and be off and home by 8:00.  Also this place, is more centrally located for most of us.  Because after all, it's just going to be us that see each other all the time anyway.

That's what I would have done, but---I'm keeping my mouth shut!!
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Dar came over.  I haven't seen her in a couple of days.  After three short weeks, (I thought it would take at least a month), Daddy is driving her nuts!  

So far he has insisted she clean out her shed and throw away everything not needed and put a bike out in front of her place, for sale.  The bike has sat there for two weeks, and no takers.  I told her I thought she should give it to her brother, who lives in a sub-division with kids, for him to sell for her.  After all,  this street only gets traffic from the people who live on it and we're all old and don't need a 14-speed dirt bike! (That she bought to bribe her grandson with and he never rode it.)

Daddy has to go out every morning for breakfast--she must drive him.  Then back home.  I guess they do have lunch at home, but at 1:00 every day, I see them leave because Daddy has to go to the park/millpond to walk and feed the ducks and the geese. (We have a nice lake at the end of our street where he could do that).  Then back home at 3:00--out they go again at 5:00 for supper and if they don't get a Dairy Queen then, and come back home, they leave again at around 8:30 for Daddy to get his ice cream, because, he has to have ice cream every day.

For the last two days, there has been a carpenter at her house, putting a new roof on her shed, because Daddy said it needed one.  Last Sunday, they had to go out looking for a fire pit, because Daddy wants to sit out by a fire and toast marshmallows.  I don't think Daddy realizes how many mosquitoes are back there by the woods.

Our Park does not allow fire pits, it has to be all enclosed.  So, they came home with what I thought was a grill at first, but no--it's a fire pit, but not a fire pit.
 Landmann Heatwave Outdoor Fire Pit and Cooking Grate
I don't know how they are going to toast marshmallows in it because, they can't open it or take off the lid.  I also don't know where they are going to get wood for it--buy it in bundles at the local Wal-Mart, I guess?

Now, Daddy is having the carpenter come back to rework Dar's back deck.  Daddy wants a screened in covered porch, gazebo.  I wonder if he intends to put the fire thingie inside the gazebo?
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I think I have been "stiffed" by one of my genealogy clients.  She contacted me really excited to find out about her family.  I "thought" she lived alone, perhaps divorced? and wondered if she could afford the normal cost, so I gave her a lower rate then I usually charge and put in a lot of hours I didn't book her for.  It was a very interesting genealogy--I even found a picture of a 14-15th great grand father of hers, who was over 100 years old in the photo.

I spent a good part of June working on it.  I mailed it to her the 7th of July.  I sent her an e-mail telling her I'd be mailing it out and she was thrilled.  I know she received it, as the Post Office notified me of the fact.  I hadn't asked for any money up front, like most of my clients pay me, but I enclosed her invoice.  

Nothing.

No check is in the mail, no response to the e-mails I have sent her--nothing.  

Maybe she has been sick?  Maybe a family member died and she has forgotten about the genealogy payment?

Disappointing to me.  

I don't use "contracts".  I trust people at their word.  I do a good job and everything in the genealogies that I do, has been researched, seventy-eleven times and I know it is factual.  I always have hours I have worked on it that I don't book my clients for. 

 Sometimes it's because I have an idea that perhaps what I found three days previously isn't correct, so I go "off the time clock" to go back and do more research to make sure.

I want everything in their book I can find--not just about their father's and mother's, but about ALL their ancestors.  I usually go off track and include facts about a distant Grand Mother, because a lot of times, the women's stories are much more interesting than the men's. LOL

Trying to connect it all can be difficult, especially when I suddenly leave Grandpa 14, to do some research on his wife, end up going up 10 more generations, and then have to come back to Grandpa 13 and tie it all in.

That's why I make up the pedigree charts.  So they can fold out the sheets, see their direct ancestor's at a glance and then go on into the book to read the research and any stories I have found about them.

Then another pedigree chart for the next family and on and on.

Any of you who have employed me, know how much time and effort I put into your book.  Usually it runs about 60 hours, that I charge for.  In reality, it is more like 100 hours.  The books have a nice cover and backing, bound with a metal like coil and will last for a very long time.  Usually 60+ double sided pages on special printing, heavy paper.

When I am done with the books, I pray over them.   I ask God to let this book somehow make my client happy in the knowledge of how hard their ancestor's worked to, in reality, bring them life. If they find surprises they didn't know about, I hope those surprises aren't depressing ones.  Then I wrap the book up really good, put them in a box and mail them out.  

These books are almost like my children!!  I have learned so much about the ancestor's--even cried as I recorded the names of the 10 or 13 children a family had then seeing the dates of the babies that died.  Three children, different ages, all on one day.  

Oh--the heartbreak that mother must have felt!!!

So--this instance makes me feel--not angry, it wasn't that much money owed, but I feel like I have had one of my children kidnapped!  Unappreciated!  

Taken once again for the trusting fool I have been all my life!  I just pray that she found something of interest and goodness in her book.
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I have no genealogies to work on now.  So if you know of someone, that would like their family history researched and made into a nice book, have them contact me via e-mail.  I think this time, I will require a $200.00 check or Pay Pal payment BEFORE I start the research.  If I find nothing, which would be rarer than rarer, I will send back the money.  

"Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, Deja Vu."

14 comments:

  1. My husband's class, when they got to their 50th reunion, joined up with past classes for what the call the Golden Club. All classes ever to graduate from the school have their reunion together at the high school, with help from the school to put it all together. In the cafeteria each class sits together. It's better because those early classes get so small and the members too old to organize but they the don't have to give up the parties that way. Some classes have separate pre-reunion parties, Too. My class reunion this year required us all to make 75 mile trip out of town (one way) and drive home in the dark. I thought it was stupid planning but the committee has always done costly things. I haven't been to one since my 25th.

    I think it's funny that Dar's dad is running her around.

    Do you have your genealogy client's phone number? I wouldn't hesitate to call her. There could be a good reason, but whatever it is you have a right to know why you're not getting paid. I agree that you need to set up some reasonable payment rules...maybe half down upon ordering and half when the job is delivered. In addition you could also withhold the DVD copy until full payment is received, too.

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    1. She claims she is still in a lot of pain, but this morning, I saw her practically jogging to her car to get going and she wasn't limping or walking slow at all--like when she thinks people are watching. Gladys Kravitz, reporting.

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  2. Oh my! Dar certainly deserves this Daddy time! Hee hee! Good for him for getting her place updated.

    BOO! On someone who has not paid yet. I agree with a downpayment AND payments along the way. I surely didn't mind doing that. And ... if it is someone you don't know well, maybe you should collect ALL before sending. Hey! We pay Amazon in full before we receive things. It would not be harsh at all.

    I feel you are very reasonably priced and quick on the draw to make any updates! I think I'll go look at mine again ...

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  3. I don't know the final tab until I am done. So--$200.00 up front would get me started. Then, I wouldn't have to send change to someone who paid me too much! LOL AW

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  4. I agree - downpayments and payments along the way. This isn't a hobby; it's your business! I'm sorry this woman is tardy. I hope that's all it is! Speaking of business... It's time for this client to take a deep breath and look again at what you uncovered in her family tree. Her father's history had love stories and westward expansion, easy to read. But her mother's history... that had colonizing and exploitation. A couple months have passed. Time to look again with fresh eyes.

    I'm guessing this is the 55th reunion? Heck, it should be a more modest affair (just my humble opinion). You're wise to keep out of it, and generous to do the work you've done! We're coming up on our 45th and I have zero interest in going.

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    1. 55th? Are sweet you are. I graduated June 6, 1957! I was married June 14, 1957. Out of school and Daddy's house and onto what I thought would be freedom. HAH!

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  5. I didn't mind at all sending you money during the process, was surprised you didn't ask for a down payment. My mom and aunt loved the books, and a friend of my aunt's asked for your name and email...maybe a new client!! Have a great day

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  6. I've never attended a High School Reunion. I didn't like High School, so I don't want to revisit it :)

    It's hard to believe that someone wouldn't pay you for your hard work. Do they read your blog? Maybe public shame will help? SHAME ON YOU.....DEADBEAT!

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    Replies
    1. Very small school. Graduating 28-32 kids. We all knew each other since Kindergarten and were more like family. So--it's like a family reunion. There was no bullying or mean stuff among us or the classes on either side.

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  7. i don't attend high school reunions, i attended one and i did not enjoy it.

    i am so surprised your client did not pay you. work like that is so personal, so heartfelt. i can't image not paying for it. you should now require a deposit before beginning work, so this never happens to you again!!! i wonder how people live with themselves!!!

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    Replies
    1. I loved school. You probably went to a big city school. Anyone I know who went to a city school, has no desire to go to reunions. They don't remember any fun from school. Too many people--we have all known each other most of our entire growing up lives, so--it's all like Home Town week.

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  8. Shame on that person that stiffed you! Yes, the only way to do business these days is to get payment up front. People cannot be trusted!

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  9. H loves to go to his school reunion. I've never been to mine, but I have gone with him to his. I agree with you that simple is better.

    I can't believe that someone stiffed you. I hope she reconsiders.

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