"How
about we communicate via phone or in person? It's much preferred, I think, to
be able to communicate well.
I
hope you know you can call me anytime. I might not always be able to get to my
phone, but it is always great to hear your voice.
Be
well, Mom, love you"
============================
She's right of course!
Usually though when I get the emotional crack-ups, it is at the end of the day, and I have stewed about them for hours.
One of the worse things of living all alone.
No one to talk to at the moment I need to bounce ideas off them.
Sometimes I remind myself of Dar!!!
===========
I feel a bit vindicated--well not vindicated, but like I am not totally losing it. When I told Pearl about what the women said at the lunch, her mouth dropped open.
"You mean...they all knew before you did?"
"Yes."
"I'd be mad too. That's just not right!"
Then! Take her up on it!!! CALL! Maybe try that with everyone!!!
ReplyDeleteThat's a good email and you didn't have to wait very long to hear from her. That's great, Judy. If it were me, I'd try calling once a week to chit chat about nothing in particular, not let the loneliness build up to a point that it has in the past. I call them touching bases phone calls when I do them.
ReplyDeleteMeant to tell you a few days ago that I think it's normal for sisters to want to get together for a girls day without including their mother. I imagine that does hurt a little but from their point of view, younger people can act and talk differently without us older ones around.Their closeness to you is different from their closeness as sisters.
Sleep well tonight!
I'm glad you heard from Karen. I agree that it's always better to communicate in person anyway.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you heard from Karen. I agree that it's always better to communicate in person anyway.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you've had to go through all this stuff. I'd have been hurt too to find out my friends knew things about my life before I did.
ReplyDeleteWhat you've said about stewing all day about something and then reacting, my Mom does that too. She's alone and thinks and thinks about something and then....she reacts and her reaction isn't always taken well. She's not like you though, she's really nasty and hurtful in the things she says.
Emails and text messages can be taken wrong though, there are so many little clues in face to face communication that are missing in the written word.
I hope, over time, your relationship with them will feel better, although it may never feel better with Jen.
I don't know why, but had a feeling that Karen would be the one to make you feel better. And, so glad she sent that email. It's hard for me to understand in that I have one child, however when we weren't living together we normally only touched base once a week or even longer. I always felt that if she had something to talk about, I'd hear from her. I'm like you though, and let things bottle up and then need some way to purge those feelings. Things are different the past few years; we don't always get along and in that way I understand.
ReplyDeletexoxo
I'm not sure that made sense, but there are little feet running around this morning; it's hard to concentrate.
I agree that talking is better than email. I'd start giving her a call occasionally and talk about lighthearted things. I can understand why your feelings were hurt when you learned that your friends knew something about your son's health and no one told you. It's that awful feeling of being left out. Jen has problems. I don't know what to say. Our kids are our kids, and no matter what, we love them.
ReplyDeleteI know that I've had to really work at being able to "respond" to things that bother me, rather than reacting. In fact, for a while, I wrote "Respond, don't REact" on my hand for several days to remind myself. It has helped me to think before I speak...or write.
ReplyDelete