Sometimes Dar brings it on herself. She is very quick with saying critical, biting things. She is sarcastic. I understand making sarcastic comments can get one in trouble--been there, done that!
I found out why Connie took the kids and left early. One of the grand kids said, "I'm glad you haven't moved, Grandma."
Connie said, "Grandma can't sell this place and move. My name is on the title."
Dar replied, "And one of these days, Grandma is going to give your mother some money and get her name off the title. She needs money right now, more than she needs the title to this place."
=============================
I look around at families I know and I see why the people I know, act like they do. There is an underlying problem from childhood--usually perpetrated by a parent. It seems to come down from the generations before and continues.
Dar's mother was very cool to her, could be biting with words at times. Because Dar's mother's mother was like that. Dar is like that. Three generations that I know off and Dar's children are like that. 4 generations.
Pearl's mother left when Pearl was 6 years old. Left her with her Dad, who was quite critical of her.
Pearl is very critical of her two daughter's, and they of her.
I was there last evening and Pearl's daughter Marge came to visit. They were at each other immediately. Pearl telling Marge, "Why would you come by this late in the evening?" Marge asking about them getting new faucets and Pearl had written down the figures on the un-printed edge of the newspaper and Marge saying, "Why didn't you write the estimate on a piece of paper where you could read it?"
Pearl said, "I can understand it, Smart Mouth."
Marge said, "Well explain it to me."
Pearl tried and couldn't figure it out or remember.
Marge said, "A lot of good those notes are gonna do you now."
I got up and left. I could not stand the disrespect back and forth.
It's like a way of communication that has come down through the generations to the present people. I wonder why Dar and Pearl don't stop it from continuing, because now I see it passing from their children onto the way the younger ones talk to their mothers.
==========================
So--I have been in the dumps for the last couple of weeks. I don't know why. There is no reason.
I YEARN for physical closeness. I miss touching. I just sat and cried the other day because my arms felt like they ached to hold a baby. Any baby! I just long to hold a little baby--a new born or up to 3 months old.
Right now, I so miss the physical touching of a man. I long for a hug from a nice tall man. When their arms just wrap around you and hold you, tightly to them. The sound of their heart. The way they smell. I want to be enfolded in a nice, long hug.
I want to hold a man's hand. Just sit and talk while holding hands.
Sometimes I look at John and wonder what it would be like to kiss him. I miss kissing. What a disaster that would be!
I'd just like to go to sleep with a man, spooned behind me so I could feel his breath on the back of my neck, feel his arms around me and hear him breathing.
That's quite impossible because I don't know any man that would accommodate me without wondering what was up, wanting more or thinking I was interested in him. I am NOT interested in HIM--I just long for a man--a tall man--any man.
I need a paid man who will come to my house, sit with me and watch a football game, talk about the game, laugh, hug, cuddle, kiss and then stretch out on the bed and sleep. One who does that as a profession and knows, nothing is meant by it.
And I need a baby. Not for very long--just a couple of hours, so I could hold it and smell its baby smell, and let it fall asleep on my chest while we rock in my chair.
======================
I gotta get out of this mood!
I don't want to get stupid and kiss John and kidnap a baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Local elderly woman kidnaps baby and baby's grandfather. News at 11:00!
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Monday, September 21, 2015
Poor Darlene!
I feel really sorry for Dar.
She got notice two weeks ago that her daughter Connie, who accused her mother of child abuse and then walked out and moved to Indy, with the four grandchildren, was coming for a weekend visit--Friday night through Sunday afternoon. They wanted to stay at Dar's house.
The daughter and the grand kids lived with Dar for two years when she first moved here.
Dar got all excited and I kept warning her to "don't get your hopes up for a reconciliation", "don't go into this with expectations", "Connie may still be nasty to you, so...just enjoy the kids."
Well Dar--because she is Dar, went nutsy-cuckoo and transferred $1,000 from her savings account to her checking account and went all bat crazy.
A re-do of her small bathroom, down by her extra bedrooms. Vanity, toilet, flooring.
New linens for the two bedrooms and curtains.
$300.00 worth of food because, "each kid wants something different."
All sorts of planned activities, on and on.
New Mums for her garden.
Connie was supposed to arrive at 8:00 pm, after Dar got off work. Connie showed up at 2:00 and they all trooped into Meijers and up to Dar's check-out lane. She was busy and could not talk.
One of the kids parked their car in my driveway, which was fine with me, but the girl never even came up to the door to say "Hi", even though I knew her quite well when they lived here.
The kids spent the night Friday night, then Dar made them a huge breakfast with all sorts of Belgium waffles; strawberry, blueberry, plain, poached eggs, sausage links AND patties, a large fruit bowl, cinnamon rolls and special coffee.
Dar's Dad came over. He had specifically requested Connie and the kids come for a visit. At 94, he wanted to see them again.
I saw cars pull away at 2:00 on Saturday, figuring they were all going out for lunch or a movie or some other activity.
=====================
I wondered what was going on Saturday evening, when only Dar's car was there.
I wondered what was going on all day Sunday, when only Dar's car was there.
I almost walked over, but figured I knew what had happened and Dar probably needed at least a day to get out of her hyper-panicked, hysterical, depressed mode and a bit back to normal.
----------------------------------
She came over this morning.
First off--it threw her when they arrived early, wanted the key to her house and were there for six hours before she got home.
#2: Her oldest grand girl, Zoe, who parked in my driveway, brought her boyfriend and they took a bedroom and slept together. Dar was ticked off big time. Connie knew her mother wouldn't go for that, but didn't say a word until it was time for bed.
#3. Her youngest grand girl, Hope, at 7 years old, whom Dar had practically raised from birth, acted like a snot and wasn't very receptive to her Grandma.
#4. She hardly recognized her middle grand girl, who is quite tall, looks and dresses like a boy and has declared, at 13, that she is a Lesbian.
#5. At the breakfast table, the oldest grand girl was talking about the new panties they make for when you "menstruate." You don't have to wear a tampon or pad. They are similar to the new incontinence panties and cost $35.00 a pair. All this in front of the boyfriend. Dar was embarrassed out of her mind!
#6. At 1:30, Connie, stood up and stated, "Well kids, we came to see Great Grand Papa and we've seen him. Let's head home." and off they went half an hour later.
No staying through the weekend. Connie never addressed her Mother, only made indirect comments meant for Dar to hear.
------------------------------------------
Needless to say, for Dar, it was an awful visit. She said, "I just kept repeating in my head, ' Enjoy the kids. Enjoy the kids.' "
"It's a good thing you didn't come over yesterday," she said. "I was in a terrible state and you would have wanted to take me to the hospital!"
================================
I know how she felt. We tell ourselves not to have any expectations, but there always is and when things don't turn out like we think they will, it is a terrible blow to our emotions.
WE ARE THE MOTHER'S!
WE ARE THE GRANDMA'S!
We think they should respect us, love us and treat us nicely. Very often, it doesn't happen that way.
She got notice two weeks ago that her daughter Connie, who accused her mother of child abuse and then walked out and moved to Indy, with the four grandchildren, was coming for a weekend visit--Friday night through Sunday afternoon. They wanted to stay at Dar's house.
The daughter and the grand kids lived with Dar for two years when she first moved here.
Dar got all excited and I kept warning her to "don't get your hopes up for a reconciliation", "don't go into this with expectations", "Connie may still be nasty to you, so...just enjoy the kids."
Well Dar--because she is Dar, went nutsy-cuckoo and transferred $1,000 from her savings account to her checking account and went all bat crazy.
A re-do of her small bathroom, down by her extra bedrooms. Vanity, toilet, flooring.
New linens for the two bedrooms and curtains.
$300.00 worth of food because, "each kid wants something different."
All sorts of planned activities, on and on.
New Mums for her garden.
Connie was supposed to arrive at 8:00 pm, after Dar got off work. Connie showed up at 2:00 and they all trooped into Meijers and up to Dar's check-out lane. She was busy and could not talk.
One of the kids parked their car in my driveway, which was fine with me, but the girl never even came up to the door to say "Hi", even though I knew her quite well when they lived here.
The kids spent the night Friday night, then Dar made them a huge breakfast with all sorts of Belgium waffles; strawberry, blueberry, plain, poached eggs, sausage links AND patties, a large fruit bowl, cinnamon rolls and special coffee.
Dar's Dad came over. He had specifically requested Connie and the kids come for a visit. At 94, he wanted to see them again.
I saw cars pull away at 2:00 on Saturday, figuring they were all going out for lunch or a movie or some other activity.
=====================
I wondered what was going on Saturday evening, when only Dar's car was there.
I wondered what was going on all day Sunday, when only Dar's car was there.
I almost walked over, but figured I knew what had happened and Dar probably needed at least a day to get out of her hyper-panicked, hysterical, depressed mode and a bit back to normal.
----------------------------------
She came over this morning.
First off--it threw her when they arrived early, wanted the key to her house and were there for six hours before she got home.
#2: Her oldest grand girl, Zoe, who parked in my driveway, brought her boyfriend and they took a bedroom and slept together. Dar was ticked off big time. Connie knew her mother wouldn't go for that, but didn't say a word until it was time for bed.
#3. Her youngest grand girl, Hope, at 7 years old, whom Dar had practically raised from birth, acted like a snot and wasn't very receptive to her Grandma.
#4. She hardly recognized her middle grand girl, who is quite tall, looks and dresses like a boy and has declared, at 13, that she is a Lesbian.
#5. At the breakfast table, the oldest grand girl was talking about the new panties they make for when you "menstruate." You don't have to wear a tampon or pad. They are similar to the new incontinence panties and cost $35.00 a pair. All this in front of the boyfriend. Dar was embarrassed out of her mind!
#6. At 1:30, Connie, stood up and stated, "Well kids, we came to see Great Grand Papa and we've seen him. Let's head home." and off they went half an hour later.
No staying through the weekend. Connie never addressed her Mother, only made indirect comments meant for Dar to hear.
------------------------------------------
Needless to say, for Dar, it was an awful visit. She said, "I just kept repeating in my head, ' Enjoy the kids. Enjoy the kids.' "
"It's a good thing you didn't come over yesterday," she said. "I was in a terrible state and you would have wanted to take me to the hospital!"
================================
I know how she felt. We tell ourselves not to have any expectations, but there always is and when things don't turn out like we think they will, it is a terrible blow to our emotions.
WE ARE THE MOTHER'S!
WE ARE THE GRANDMA'S!
We think they should respect us, love us and treat us nicely. Very often, it doesn't happen that way.
Saturday, September 19, 2015
Busy
Yes--I've been busy, but it hasn't entailed any exercise and I can tell. My calf's ache from sitting too much.
I have been doing a genealogy search for Chris' family and have been very successful. I spent about 6 hours everyday on Ancestry.com. It is done now. All I need do it put it together and print it out.
I'm just trying to get money so I can get my car fixed. I lucked out with the radiator repair. Because I told them they could keep my car for as long as they needed, they could order a less expensive radiator from another supplier, who took longer to ship it. Still, it was over $300.00. Now I need to get the two Serpentine belts = $150.00 parts/labor.
I got my car back Friday, and did a lot of running around for stuff I had to get.
Thursday evening, John and Maisey stopped in for a quick porch chat. He has either a bad cold or the flu. He looks and feels miserable. He said he'd take me to get my car.
Pearl called Friday morning, Merle had gotten home from work early. She said, "We are running into Brighton for groceries. Do you want me to pick up something for you?"
I said, "No. Instead of a pick-up, can I get a drop-off?"
So I rode into town with them and got my car.
=================
Today, I've just been basically sitting in my chair, watching college football and crocheting or knitting for Chris. She has come up with another idea for a lacy shawl--crocheted. I cannot wait to test that one! Gotta get the Queen size bed cover and bath mitt done first however.
It is turning Autumn here. Lovely sunshine, nice breeze, but cold at night and only in the high 60's during the day. My kind of weather. I have a whole lot of garden work to do too. Cutting back the perennials and cleaning up the gardens.
I need to drain the water heater too and buy and install a new furnace filter. Fasting Cholesterol blood test and flu shot at the docs.
I think the first week of October, I am going to have to let my handiwork sit and get outside and do my chores.
I think I need to make a list because my mind/memory seems to be going. I never had to make lists in the old days. When I worked, I never carried a Franklin Planner with notes written in it.
All of what I had to do, or where I had to go, or whatever, was stored in my brain and I never missed. Now, even though I put everything on my calendar, in red--appointment wise--I forget things I need to do around the house.
Things as simple as, "don't forget to clean the litter box." Simple things like that. It worries me that my memory is failing. I can tell you the exact year and day I lost my virginity, but I can't tell you what I ate for supper last night. It is very weird!!
I have been doing a genealogy search for Chris' family and have been very successful. I spent about 6 hours everyday on Ancestry.com. It is done now. All I need do it put it together and print it out.
I'm just trying to get money so I can get my car fixed. I lucked out with the radiator repair. Because I told them they could keep my car for as long as they needed, they could order a less expensive radiator from another supplier, who took longer to ship it. Still, it was over $300.00. Now I need to get the two Serpentine belts = $150.00 parts/labor.
I got my car back Friday, and did a lot of running around for stuff I had to get.
Thursday evening, John and Maisey stopped in for a quick porch chat. He has either a bad cold or the flu. He looks and feels miserable. He said he'd take me to get my car.
Pearl called Friday morning, Merle had gotten home from work early. She said, "We are running into Brighton for groceries. Do you want me to pick up something for you?"
I said, "No. Instead of a pick-up, can I get a drop-off?"
So I rode into town with them and got my car.
=================
Today, I've just been basically sitting in my chair, watching college football and crocheting or knitting for Chris. She has come up with another idea for a lacy shawl--crocheted. I cannot wait to test that one! Gotta get the Queen size bed cover and bath mitt done first however.
It is turning Autumn here. Lovely sunshine, nice breeze, but cold at night and only in the high 60's during the day. My kind of weather. I have a whole lot of garden work to do too. Cutting back the perennials and cleaning up the gardens.
I need to drain the water heater too and buy and install a new furnace filter. Fasting Cholesterol blood test and flu shot at the docs.
I think the first week of October, I am going to have to let my handiwork sit and get outside and do my chores.
I think I need to make a list because my mind/memory seems to be going. I never had to make lists in the old days. When I worked, I never carried a Franklin Planner with notes written in it.
All of what I had to do, or where I had to go, or whatever, was stored in my brain and I never missed. Now, even though I put everything on my calendar, in red--appointment wise--I forget things I need to do around the house.
Things as simple as, "don't forget to clean the litter box." Simple things like that. It worries me that my memory is failing. I can tell you the exact year and day I lost my virginity, but I can't tell you what I ate for supper last night. It is very weird!!
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
And The Beat Goes On
...and I am really tired of being beat up!!
I had to run up to Brighton yesterday. Glad I stopped and got a Subway for supper and today's lunch.
I pulled into my driveway, parked my car and heard a strange, wet sound.
Got out to look and apparently the small leak in the car radiator had given way, because a lot of green tinted liquid was pouring from the front of my car.
On August 29th, John told me that rather than me taking my car back to the service garage to get a new radiator, he knew a guy who did car repairs out of his home and would get that guys phone number, right away.
"It will be half the price the service garage quoted you."
So, here we are, three weeks later. Every time I asked him he'd say, "Yup. I know right where that phone number is and I'll call you today." Every. Damn. Time. I. Asked!!
He and Maisey stopped in last night for a porch chat and he noticed the large puddle of anti-freeze under my car.
"What happened?"
"The radiator gave way and I lost all the coolant."
"What are you going to do?"
"Get a new radiator."
"Well, you better wash that anti-freeze off your cement. It is poisonous to dogs. I wouldn't want Maisey to lick it."
If it wasn't for Maisey, who was enjoying treats out of my hand, I would have kicked John out of his chair and off my porch! I mean--literally kicked him!
It was all I could do to hold myself in and not slap his face or yell at him.
=========================
This morning, I called the towing company and had them take my car into the service garage. I hope my Road Service pays the $86.50 for the tow.
I got paid today, for work I've done for Chris and I think I can squeeze the rest for the repair, out of my checking--if I don't buy any groceries.
AND--when I get my car back, I am going to drive out to where John said the guy lives and I will stop and get his phone number and an estimate on what it will cost to get the 2 new serpentine belts put on.
AND--when John wants work done on his car, and can't remember or find the guys number, do you think I'm going to tell him I know it."
Ain't happening!!!
I have always despised procrastinators and do not/will not be held captive by their bad habit!!
I had to run up to Brighton yesterday. Glad I stopped and got a Subway for supper and today's lunch.
I pulled into my driveway, parked my car and heard a strange, wet sound.
Got out to look and apparently the small leak in the car radiator had given way, because a lot of green tinted liquid was pouring from the front of my car.
On August 29th, John told me that rather than me taking my car back to the service garage to get a new radiator, he knew a guy who did car repairs out of his home and would get that guys phone number, right away.
"It will be half the price the service garage quoted you."
So, here we are, three weeks later. Every time I asked him he'd say, "Yup. I know right where that phone number is and I'll call you today." Every. Damn. Time. I. Asked!!
He and Maisey stopped in last night for a porch chat and he noticed the large puddle of anti-freeze under my car.
"What happened?"
"The radiator gave way and I lost all the coolant."
"What are you going to do?"
"Get a new radiator."
"Well, you better wash that anti-freeze off your cement. It is poisonous to dogs. I wouldn't want Maisey to lick it."
If it wasn't for Maisey, who was enjoying treats out of my hand, I would have kicked John out of his chair and off my porch! I mean--literally kicked him!
It was all I could do to hold myself in and not slap his face or yell at him.
=========================
This morning, I called the towing company and had them take my car into the service garage. I hope my Road Service pays the $86.50 for the tow.
I got paid today, for work I've done for Chris and I think I can squeeze the rest for the repair, out of my checking--if I don't buy any groceries.
AND--when I get my car back, I am going to drive out to where John said the guy lives and I will stop and get his phone number and an estimate on what it will cost to get the 2 new serpentine belts put on.
AND--when John wants work done on his car, and can't remember or find the guys number, do you think I'm going to tell him I know it."
Ain't happening!!!
I have always despised procrastinators and do not/will not be held captive by their bad habit!!
Monday, September 14, 2015
Our Last Day
Chrissy stopped on her way south. She was headed to Ohio and the expressway, just two miles from me, is the one to take to get to Ohio and parts south.
Love you Chrissy! Be safe and come back soon!
Sunday, September 13, 2015
Labor Day
Labor Day--Chris' last full day here.
I was up early, ready and waiting when she arrived.
I felt energized and alive. Her visit had renewed my mind and spirit.
I had a few chores for her to do too.
The night before, I tore my craft closet apart. gathered all my knitting needles and crochet hooks, threw them down on the floor and had Chris organize them and put them in labelled baggies.
Then, we were off for lunch at Outback Steak House. I had been wanting to go for the longest time. I love their Victoria Filet Mignon and baked potato and French Onion soup. It was her husband's treat, so she and I ordered all sorts of expensive stuff, ate and still had left overs for the next day.
We had to stop at Michael's again. I can't remember why, but there was some pressing reason. Something she had forgotten to get that was needed.
Back home, and I hated to ask her, but I have been wanting to flip the mattress on my bed. So we tore the bed apart and did that. My, that girl is strong. I hardly had to lift a finger. She also put back all the heavy boxes into my craft closet.
Then she remembered that she had forgotten to get some Michigan made Vernon's Ginger Ale to take back home, so up to the little market 1/2 mile away for that. She got two cartons.
I should have reminded her to get some Better Made (Michigan made) potato chips, but I completely forgot all about them, until I picked some up this week.
By now, it was 4:00 in the afternoon and she had to go get Maisey, at Animal Crackers, where she was boarded.
Maisey or some other dog, had peed on her blankie and Chris thought she smelled, So she took Maisey into the bathroom for a bath.
I peeked in and realized, Chris was in the shower WITH the dog. It seems Maisey will not take a bath unless Chris is in with her.
And..all of a sudden, it was 7:00 and time for them to drive back to the camper and get it ready to roll on tomorrow morning.
Chris promised she would stop in the morning, on her way to Ohio, for one last hug and kiss!
I was up early, ready and waiting when she arrived.
I felt energized and alive. Her visit had renewed my mind and spirit.
I had a few chores for her to do too.
The night before, I tore my craft closet apart. gathered all my knitting needles and crochet hooks, threw them down on the floor and had Chris organize them and put them in labelled baggies.
Then, we were off for lunch at Outback Steak House. I had been wanting to go for the longest time. I love their Victoria Filet Mignon and baked potato and French Onion soup. It was her husband's treat, so she and I ordered all sorts of expensive stuff, ate and still had left overs for the next day.
Back home, and I hated to ask her, but I have been wanting to flip the mattress on my bed. So we tore the bed apart and did that. My, that girl is strong. I hardly had to lift a finger. She also put back all the heavy boxes into my craft closet.
Then she remembered that she had forgotten to get some Michigan made Vernon's Ginger Ale to take back home, so up to the little market 1/2 mile away for that. She got two cartons.
I should have reminded her to get some Better Made (Michigan made) potato chips, but I completely forgot all about them, until I picked some up this week.
By now, it was 4:00 in the afternoon and she had to go get Maisey, at Animal Crackers, where she was boarded.
Maisey or some other dog, had peed on her blankie and Chris thought she smelled, So she took Maisey into the bathroom for a bath.
I peeked in and realized, Chris was in the shower WITH the dog. It seems Maisey will not take a bath unless Chris is in with her.
Maisey was finally done and ready to get out.
Chrissy dried her off and I threw her blanket in the washer and drier, while we talked.
And..all of a sudden, it was 7:00 and time for them to drive back to the camper and get it ready to roll on tomorrow morning.
Chris promised she would stop in the morning, on her way to Ohio, for one last hug and kiss!
Friday, September 11, 2015
Sunday, the 6th.
Chris arrived at 9:50. She said she couldn't wait until 10:00.
We decided to go to another Flint favorite eating place--Halo Burger, which recently has moved to Brighton. Halo Burger is famous for their olive burger.
The burgers aren't as good as they were, back in the 50-60's, but Chris did get a Boston Cooler--vanilla ice cream with VERNOR'S Ginger Ale. Has to be Vernor's, another made in Michigan product.
======================
Then, up the street, back to JoAnn's because she needed more yarn(?)
Across the street to Meijer's because she needed some Melatonin, some salads and some fresh fruit.
We did not find the LIQUID Melatonin she wanted, but I found a big plastic storage box to put all my new yarn in.
Back on the road and headed home. I was feeling pretty good. Not tired at all!
I pulled into Merle and Pearl's driveway so that she could meet them. We had a nice chat. They were very interested in what her little trailer is like.
Chris wanted to go up to Wal-Mart. So we put her stuff in the refrigerator and off we went.
On the way out, we saw John and Maisey and his next door neighbor, Jeff, standing in John's driveway, so I pulled in to introduce her.
John asked her about her little trailer then he started bragging about his camper. We left pretty soon and as I pulled away, Chris said, "You aren't all twitter-pated about him, are you?"
"No"
"Good!"
We got to Wal-Mart and she found the kind of Melatonin she wanted. Then we checked out their yarn department, then over to the meat department, where she got 3# of (Michigan made) Koegel Viennas.
Now, when she gets back home, she can make her own Coney Dogs. :-)
===========
Back home, I collapsed in my chair with an ice cold Diet Pepsi and we chattered on until 7:00, when she had to leave.
I was tired out, but not exhausted and feeling very content and happy.
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