Tired

In regards to the popcorn, because I have it three or four a couple times a week, I am going to get one of those poppers that is used IN the Microwave, but with regular popcorn.  Pam and Jennifer have one and really like theirs.  Then I can add my own REAL butter.  They say, this one is the best.  You have to use disks in the bottom to concentrate the microwaves.  Walmart--about $13.00.

===================================

So--Dar stopped in.  ARGGH!  She was in hospital last week for 3 days.  She had a fast heartbeat, caused from a reaction to a Flu medication she was on, plus dehydration.

She was in the same hospital I stayed in last spring and had to have a cardio-inversion, to get her heart back to normal sinus rhythm, just like I had.

To hear her tell it, "They tried to kill me!"

"I tried to tell them,, I am allergic to everything!  But, they wouldn't listen to me.  They acted like I was a  hysterical, old woman!"

"Did you get in one of your hysterical fits?"

"Probably.  I remember crying and talking very loud. They were trying to kill me!"

"How did they try to kill you?"

"With the inversion!  They put something in my IV and I went out like a light!  When I woke up, they told me they zapped my heart to get it back in rhythm.  They didn't tell me they were going to do that!"

"I'm sure they did.  When I had it, they explained it all to me and I had to sign a paper giving them permission.  Did you sign anything?"

"Yes, but I didn't know it was for that!"

"No one explained it to you?  They just put something in your IV and you went out?"

"I thought they were giving me something to calm me down!"

"And it did, didn't it?  Fentanyl works great that way.  You get a nice nap and feel great when you wake up." ( and I giggled.)

"Then I had to have a stress test and once again, they put something nuclear in my IV and my heart rate went up and I started yelling.  I must have been allergic to that too!"

"They probably used Thallium as the tracer dye to show if your blood flow is sufficient for your heart.  Did you lay on the table, with the electrodes on your chest while they did the procedure?"

"Yes.  But my heart rate went up."

"It's suppose to.  Like if you were exercising or on a treadmill."

"Well, they didn't tell me that was going to happen!"

"Were you nervous?  They probably told you, but you didn't hear them because.......well, you know how hysterical you get when you are in the hospital."
==============
Then we dropped that subject (thank you Lord) and she went off on a tirade about how her brother and sister-in-law are trying to kill her ninety-four old father.

"I know they are controlling him!  I would like to get him out of there, but he can't come live with me because of my son and grand kids being here."

"I thought you gave him the option last fall and he didn't want to live with you."

"He didn't.  He said I was a woman and women are controlling.  Besides, he is afraid that people will talk if they see me living with a man." (What?) 

"Why doesn't he go live with your other brother.  Take him up to their new house....like for a two week visit.  He'd enjoy being near the water.  Then, he could just stay there."

"I have already thought of that.  Pat (SIL) always took such good care of him when he used to live with them.  I plan on calling her when I get home and set it up.  I'm off work so I can take him up for a visit tomorrow."

Well, tomorrow came and went and her car didn't leave her driveway, so I guess Daddy is still stuck in the house with the son who is "trying to kill him."

I suggested two years ago that Daddy move into one of the many Senior housing places around here.  We have half a dozen of them.  Very nice and expensive--like $3,500.00 a month expensive.  Since Daddy is a millionaire, and loves to be around a lot of women, he'd probably enjoy it.  But, that is out of the question because, "We don't want Daddy to think we are sticking him in a home."  So they never suggested it or took him around for a tour of the places.

Dar did not ask how I was doing, nor did she notice the cedar chest just 3 feet away from her.  She hasn't noticed as yet that the tall media cabinet is no longer there.
===================
John and Maizey stopped in this morning.  He sat in the same chair Dar occupies when she visits.  He talked while I cooed to Maizey, petted her and gave her a few Cheerios as a treat.

John told me the very same things he told me last night, when they stopped in.  He has to have an ultra sound on his foot.  That is Monday.  At the UofM in Ann Arbor.  He is going up north Tuesday, to visit his sisters/brother, he will be back next Friday.   He got upset with his neighbor playing music too loud at 2:00am and turned him into the office.  (That is the 4th time he told me that), and he has to take Maizey to the groomer tomorrow.

John did not ask how I was doing, but did caution that it was raining very hard and I should be careful if I had to drive today.

An hour later, I stood up and said to Maizey, "Precious Pup, I have to get busy and you have to continue your walk."
(In other words, time for you to go, John)
==================
Sometimes, I gotta tell ya, these two people drain every ounce of energy out of me!

I need to go up and visit Pearl again, where she and I would have a TWO-WAY conversation.  Like normal people.  

Normal people seem to be missing from my life.
  

Stuff & Such

Maizey and her Daddy stopped in last evening and while we were talking, Merle and Pearl walked in to give me a box of Peeps, for Easter.

The four of us sat and chatted and gosh--it was fun!  Other than John interrupting a couple of times to turn the conversation back to him (he has a bad habit of doing that), we had a nice, generalized conversation for an hour.  It reminded me of "normal".

===========================
Today has been another "do nothing" day and I have to admit--I was bored all day!  Nothing to keep my hands busy.  Nothing on TV except news from Brussels.  Not in the mood to read, so just sat in my chair.
===============
No matter that the rail planter on the porch is filled with Squirrel food, there is always one maverick critter that thinks the bird seed far above is better.

===============================================

Quite often, I have popcorn and milk for supper.  I use microwaveable popcorn.

When I take out the bag to dump it into a bowl, the butter splatters on the counter.

I have to use Soft Scrub with bleach to get the stains off the counter.



I have been thinking, if that "butter" is that hard to remove from the counter, what kind of bad thing is it doing to my innards?!
===================
I posted this pondering on Face Book.  Do any of you "Seasoned Ladies" ever feel this way?

It's difficult to get older and try and maintain a positive attitude and youthful mind. We get stripped of our dignity.

We can't walk as quickly and steadily, as we used to. There are foods that are difficult to eat, because of our shaky hands. We have spots and stains on the front of our clothes, from those mishaps. We should wear a bib, but that would cause more dignity to be stripped from us.

If asked a question, we can't think or respond as fast as we used to. Everyone around us seems to talk so fast, and jump from subject to subject, we can't keep up. Hearing problems cause us to miss conversations. So we sit and smile and do the "bobble-head" nod.

Some days it takes so much effort to get up and dressed and drive to a get together. Sometimes all the noise and action involved in those activities just simply tire us out. We want to stay involved, to keep active, so we push ourselves. Which, in the long run, is good for us.

Sometimes we feel invisible. We just aren't as vital and vibrant anymore, which can make us feel not needed. Yet, in our minds, we are still 30 years old! We want to be quick of wit and walk. We want to join in with our humor. We are just slowing down, in all ways.

We don't want pity. We don't want looks of concern. We don't want offers of help up and down the steps. All that just proves to us, how old we are!  Some of us are stubborn that way.

Someone said, "Growing old is not for sissies!"

How true!! Anyone else my age feel this way?

.....and the beat goes on............

........and more terrorists attacks and we hear the news and see the pictures and say, "This is terrible.  This world we live in is in trouble."  Then we go about our day, as I did today because---I am becoming inured to it all.  When I see the Alert--"Breaking News"--I wonder, "Oh!  Where now?"  Then I sit down and watch TV a bit and then change the channel or get on with my day.  It's becoming part of our lives, isn't it?

==================

I moved the cedar chest over on my "fireplace-to-be" wall and took the Rattan trunk and put it at the end of my bed.  I am thinking of swapping out the handles with black iron or something, as these handles make it look too Early American style, which I have NEVER liked. :-)  My fireplace will have black iron handles on the doors.

So when I get it, and move the cedar chest back in front of the couch, they will match up really well.  Right now, I am a couple hundred dollars short of the $402.00 I need, but on a good note---I have $600.00 in my "Car Repair" envelope.  I am planning on getting the car fixed next month.  YAY!!!

===========

I did make a quick run up to Walmart this afternoon.  I was out of milk and Nestle's Quik, which I have for breakfast every morning.  Also needed a banana, two candy bars and 4 jugs of Pepsi.

This is what I noticed today with my Purry Furry's.

Oh. My. Gosh!

Where do I begin?  

Where did I leave off?

What a weekend!!

Of course, by now, you've all heard of my Spartans tragic loss.  One and done!  For the last couple of months, sports commentators and those in the know have been stating, "I see the Spartans going all the way and winning the NCAA Championship."  I have stated that, "I've heard that before."

In reality--I bought into the whole hype.  They won the Big Ten Tournament.  They had a terrific season.  We had the Big Ten player of the year.  We had the winningest coach in Big Ten history.  What could go wrong?

A bit too cocky perhaps?  Thought playing a 15th ranked team was going to be a walk in the park?

The biggest upset in NCAA Basketball tournament history.

This says it all:

=================

After I recovered from that--well, actually I still haven't recovered and probably never will! 

Anyway, a kid that used to play softball for my Dad and graduated with my sister and a Friend on Face Book, is moving and had a cedar chest for sale.  A LANE cedar chest.  I have always wanted one.  My Mother had promised I could have hers, someday, but apparently when my little sister was in her teens, Mother also promised it to her.

I did not get one for my graduation, as most of my girlfriends.  I was getting married.  I needed mixers and electric fry pans.  I didn't need a "hope" chest.  Then when Mother died and my little sister was two weeks shy of her 18th birthday and about to graduate, of course I didn't say a word and let her take the cherished cedar chest.

So, I inquired as to the price and he wanted $200.00 for it.  Sadly, I could not afford to pay that.  I loved it though.  It was just my style and the wood matched my furniture.  I didn't respond to his comment on the price, but last Thursday, he personal messaged me and said, for me, he'd sell it for $100.00 AND deliver it!!!  I took the bait!!

He brought it over on Saturday.

I have felt guilty ever since for spending that money, but....I DO love it!!!

and, Guess what?  It was manufactured in 1956-57.  The year I would have picked it out for my hope chest!

===================

Sunday the Big Day for Maddie's ballet.  I had no idea what a BIG DAY it was going to be!!

I always leave early for these kinds of things.  Just in case.  I usually get there a half hour early, find a nice up close parking spot and sit in my car and people watch.

The ballet was to start at 2:30.  I left here at 1:30 to make the 12 mile trek.

I thought I knew where I was going, but when I got there?  I wasn't where I was supposed to be.  So, I back tracked and started again--3 times I did this.  Then I got out my "for emergencies only" Obama SafeLink phone and called:  Karen--Pam--Jennifer.  I found out later, they didn't recognize the number so they didn't return the call.

I decided to try one last time and go beyond where I thought the high school was.  As I sped along, I could see the big school off in the distance, but for the life of me, I couldn't figure out how to get there.  Finally, I just turned on a road that looked like it might be near the school and ended up at the middle school, wended my way around the paths and ended up at the school.  2:15!!!

Luck was on my side, as the parking lot was filled to the brim with ONE handicap parking slot open.  I pulled in, searched for my handicap thingy (that I rarely use) and whipped it over the rear view mirror

I got in the school, ran into the ladies room and there stood Jennifer!  We glanced at each other and didn't even recognize each other at first.  She washing her hands and me racing into a stall.

The ballet was lovely.  Of course.  There were 3 starring roles, Maddie had one of them.  Of course.  I got to meet my oldest grandson Marcus' girlfriend Lauren.  Karen was right.  She is a lovely girl.  Not pretentious in the least.  Very real and normal.

 LtoR: Karen, Mike, Helene, Lauren, Marcus, Mark, Jennifer, Pam

Then, we all went to supper at a nearby Mexican restaurant.  I knew right where it was and was the first to arrive.  HAH!

My oldest grand daughter and her boyfriend Mike, Mark and Karen--left

Marcus, Lauren, Jennifer and Pammie on the right.

I sat down, across from Pam and next to my oldest grand daughter, Helene.  Helene leaned forward a bit and said to Jen, Pam and I, "You know how grandma always says it's so nice to have a new baby for Christmas?  Well, I'm pregnant.  I'm due October nineteenth."

Thankfully Jennifer and Pam started in with the squeals and the congratulations, so that I had time to recover, gain my composure and instead of saying, " YOU'RE WHAT?"

grabbed her in my arms, hugged her and whispered, "Oh my Sweet Girl.  How wonderful!"

Then I went around and over to Karen and hugged her.  "Oh Honey.  You're going to be a grandma.  You are going to love that so much!"

The family ALL appears to be very happy?  I had all these words running through my mind.  "My grand daughter is Catholic and dating a Jewish man?"  "My strict Catholic grand daughter is pregnant and unmarried?"  "They act like this is some how normal and worthy of celebration?"

Of course, I had to put those thoughts right out of my head and join in.  After all, she is my first grand child and I love and adore her unconditionally.  True acceptances comes into play because, after all...........what can you do about it now?  Mike adores her and takes such wonderful care of her.  She is 31 and it's now or never?  There is going to be a marriage--sometime.  Plus, it is none of MY business!

AND--I do love having a new baby around at Christmas time!!  and I told them, "It's going to be a girl!  Grandma's know these things."

I will have to review my baby afghan and quilts, I have stored and let Helene pick out the one she wants.  

YIKES!!  I'm going to be a Great Grandma!!

 ========================

Then, there's this one, with her sweet, innocent nature and her Purity ring firmly worn on her ring finger!!  Let's keep it that way.  Okay?

The Stuff of Life

Lately, when John and Maizey stop in, Maggie has come out of hiding.  She goes over by the TV and lays down to watch Maizey.  Saturday night, Maizey laid down on her belly and crawled over to Maggie.  They touched noses and all was well.  

Sunday night, Maggie stayed on the couch and Maizey went over and put her head on the edge of the cushion where Maggie was laying.  All was well.  

Monday morning, Maggie sat over by the TV again.  John did not have a short leash on Maizey and she went bouncing over to Maggie.  Maggie just watched and didn't react.  Then Maizey wanted to play and as dogs will, lunged a bit toward Maggie.  That's when Maggie bopped her in the face.

John called later and told me that Maizey had a bit of blood on her fur.  "Oh!  I'm so sorry." I said. He was a bit incensed that my cat had ATTACKED his doggie.  
When they came back Monday night (yes, two visits in one day!), I told John to keep Maizey on a short leash.  Maggie came out of hiding, laid on the floor by the TV and the two animals (about a foot apart) just looked at each other and then, both fell asleep.

It will be nice when it gets warm enough for John and I to sit out on the porch and then the two animals can nose each other through the screen door, like they did last summer.  
============================
I am having an unusual week--for me anyway.  Something going on every single day!!

Monday I went to the Chiropractor and tried to get (and failed) my hair cut right after wards because the Salon is on my way home.  Tuesday, I went for my 2:30 hair cut appointment.  I had three large bags of pop bottles to turn in and I usually go to Walmart or Meijers for that.  I was near Meijer's, but tried to make a left turn out of the Salon exit onto the busy street and got tired of waiting, so I turned right an up a mile to the Rich People's store.  They have a wonderfully, working and clean bottle return area.

I went into the main part of the store to turn in my receipt and get my five bucks and noticed--Pepsi was on sale.  10 for $10!!  YOWZA!! and because this store as the best "their own made" salads, I got two for $5.00.

Then off to the check-out lane and there, bagging groceries, was a friend of Maddies' I had met because of his involvement in the  High School band.  So I had to get a hug from him.  He is--oh how did we used to describe these people?  Slow.  Mentally slow and so of course, as they usually are, (stereotype) a very nice, happy, polite young man of 19.  All the kids in the band that I knew, treated him as one of their own, which has given him a lot of self confidence.  The Rich Peoples store hires a lot of these types of kids and pays them a good enough salary.

I got home, backed into my parking space and left the trunk of my car open and up--knowing full well (hee hee) that when John drove by on his way home, he stop and haul in the 10 heavy, liter bottles of Diet Pepsi.

Before he arrived, Merle was out on a walk and all of sudden, he was walking in the front door with bags in each hand.  Plus, he put them into the cabinet where I store my Pepsi.  For his help, he of course wanted a full frontal hug, which I gave, but stepped back before he could do his usual "thumbs along the under arm--side of my boobs" feel.  I am becoming pretty adept at this avoidance maneuver!

Today I had a dentist appointment at 3:00.  Actually looking forward to the X-rays, cleaning and dentist check-up.  After my soap, I took my required anti-biotic and was getting ready to leave when a huge bout of explosive diarrhea hit!  I called and cancelled and am kind of relieved.  Thankfully, I was still at home.  Maybe if it is a bug, the anti-biotic will stop it?

Thursday, is lunch with the Old School Gal Pals and stop out at The Farm to see my sister, unless the stomach distress persists!    

Friday morning it is off to the food bank.  Friday afternoon at 2:30, another Chiropractor visit.  My back continues to feel better every day.

Saturday, well nothing so far, but lots of basketball games to watch as the NCAA Tournament gets fully underway.

Sunday, Maddie is dancing in the Max Lucado "Punchinella" ballet at the high school.  Jennifer, Pam, Karen and I will be going, along with my eldest grand daughter and eldest grand son, where I will get to meet his new girlfriend.  We are going out afterward for supper.  I will miss Michigan State's second game for this, but---------for Maddie?  I would do anything for Maddie and not once mention the game. :-)  Sunday, with my girls and some grandchildren, will be a good day to keep my mouth shut unless asked and just smile and do the "doggie" head nod.  HAH!

Beware the Ides of March!

My Mother used to say, "Beware the ides of march", in a deep, powerful voice, then hunch her head down and look around as if someone were sneaking up on us.  My sister and I would have such a laugh. It got so every March 15th, we'd go through this tradition, the minute we came into the kitchen for breakfast.  

I started it with my kids when they got a little older and first thing in the morning, on that day, I'd call my Mother and in my deepest, most foreboding voice say the phrase and then hang up the phone.  The Ides of March was a very superstitious day for us--much worse than any Friday the 13th.  

My sister and I still say it to each other, but it is no longer a funny tradition.

I posted this on Face Book this morning.
==============

This is personal, and many would say, “Why does it matter now?”

I thought this might be a good venue for my family and cousins to finally see the truth and as information for others who might come up against this disease.

===============================

Our Mother died 46 years ago today, 3 months shy of her 54^th birthday.  I was 31, my sister 17.  There was never a cause found for her death. She had been extremely healthy all her life.

 Every year, on March 15th, I wrote a letter to Henry Ford Hospital, requesting ALL her hospital records.  I wanted to know if this was some sort of genetic quirk that we should know about.  

It took me 20 years, but I finally received the thick, envelope in the mail.  Inside were letters between her doctors at Owosso Memorial, Henry Ford Hospital and the Hematology specialist in Detroit.  Notes from the specialist saying, “I can find nothing wrong with this woman.” 

It has been very difficult for me not to know the “why”.  All we knew is that it seemed something was wrong with her blood.   Yes—a brain aneurysm (after a blood transfusion) ended her life, but that was not the cause of her underlying two year “disease”.  The autopsy showed nothing!

Fast forward to a couple of months ago.  An elderly lady (87), who (coincidentally) lives on my street, was hospitalized. She had the exact same symptoms as my Mother.  “They” thought she had internal bleeding so an endoscopy/colonoscopy was done, kidney biopsy, liver biopsy, spinal tap and finally a bone marrow puncture.  Exactly the tests our Mother had.  

“They” gave the lady blood transfusions until that didn’t help anymore—exactly what our Mother had gone through.  The lady passed away in December.  She was also seen by specialists.  It took them a long time to come up with a “maybe” diagnosis. 

(Coincidentally) My doctor was one that this lady had seen, so, when I had my yearly appointment with my doc in January, I asked him about this deadly, whatever it is, disease. 

They now “think” it is MDS—Myelodysplastic Syndrome—the prefix “myelo”, having to do with spinal or bone marrow.   Not Aplastic Anemia.  Not Leukemia.  Not Multiple Myeloma (blood cancer).  The bone marrow “simply” stops  making red blood cells, but also stops making white blood cells and platelets.  It usually starts in younger people.  They are (mis) diagnosed with anemia and given B12 injections and put on iron supplements.  It gradually gets worse.   

There is no known cure.  Possibly a bone marrow transplant could help, but that is not a guarantee. It is a rather rare blood disorder with about 8,000 cases in the US each year.  Because it is so rare, there aren’t a lot of research programs.

So—here we are, 46 years later, still with no real information on what causes this anomaly or how to treat it.

Why does all of this make me feel better?  Because now, I am pretty sure I know the “why” our Mother died, and I didn’t want to wait until I got to Heaven to get the answers!  Don’t we all want to know the “why”?

But, I also have to wonder—were these just coincidences?  That I would just happen to live on the same street as the elderly lady with the same disorder?  That my doctor just happened to be one of many that treated her?  

I rather think it was God’s way to finally ease my mind.

Maybe not the "why", but the "what"?
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One of the last photos of my Mother.  She looked as vibrant, happy and smiley as she always had.

Hm-mm

Trying to think of something profound or interesting to post.

I got nuttin' Honey!

Still going to the Chiropractor twice a week for my back pain.

John and Maizey stop in every day.  Tonight, Maizey got too close to my cat Maggie and Maggie whopped her a good one on the nose.

Oh--and my Spartans won the Big 10 Tournament.
================
I'll try to have a more exciting week so that I have something to post about.

Sigh