Golly Gosh

I made a vow to myself that on August 1st, I would start walking up to the lake and back every morning at 11:00.

Today is the 4th and I finally did it.  Can anyone say, "Undisciplined?"  

Halfway there---

I stopped at Fred's Heart Tree because my back was killing me.  But, I pushed on.  I sat for awhile on the picnic table by the lake--beautiful sight.  I will take pictures tomorrow, so you can see.

Then I started back.  Hips AND back were screaming all the way home and I noticed, my balance isn't all that great!  I sometimes walk like a drunken sailor!!

But, it felt good to be out, with just my thoughts.  No matter how troublesome those thoughts can be, the beauty around me helps.
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I got a nice surprise today.  My electric company sent me an e-mail informing me that my monthly budget payment went down, from $40.00 a month to $30.00.  Now, I have an extra $10.00 to put towards all the dang doctor bills because of that STUPID Obama Care influenced health insurance I signed up for last December.
<sorry, I shouldn't sound so ungrateful.>

Went into Brighton to get my hairs cut.  It sure feels good to have super short hair once again.  I never have been one to "mess" with my hair.  I want to get out of the shower, towel it dry, give it a comb and a fluff and off I go.  I have Wash and Dry hair.

Then, around 5:30 Dar came over.  She walked in with a dress.  I thought perhaps it was her mother's or something.  It looked like an old lady dress for sure--with a jacket with sparklies on it.  Midnight Blue.  Dar has olive skin and dark hair.  Personally, I think she should wear more pastels or jewel tones, but all she wears is dark colors--because she thinks she looks glamorous.

Something else I don't get--probably just me, but...she bought the dress, and of course she told me, "It cost one hundred and twenty dollars," for her cousin's, daughter's, granddaughter's wedding.

Wait.  What?

A cousin three-four times removed?  "Do you even know the girl?"

"No."

"Why are you going to her wedding?"

I have attended my cousin's weddings and sometimes their kids, but I have never attended my cousin's grand kids weddings.  We just don't go that far "down" in the family for our wedding invitations.

We mostly invite close family and friends.  Ya know--people that we know?  Oh well--

Anyway, she said, "I brought it over because I said, 'if Judy doesn't like it then it is going back.' "

Well, I didn't tell her what I thought of it, although I may have said, "At first I thought it was a vintage dress of your Mother's."

She has bright red shoes and purse to go with it and a bright red necklace made of some kind of plastic stone-like beads.  The Midnight Blue jacket already has Midnight Blue sequins and beads on it.  And why wear that color in summer?  Well--I sure am not fashionista, so what do I know?

Then she said, "I have been so busy.  I had to get a clip board, like mine, for Jim because he wanted one.  Rodney is causing all sorts of problems at work....and..."

"Dar, I told you two weeks ago that I'm really not interested in hearing about your work and union problems and people I don't know. I have no idea who Jim or Rodney are.  Tell me news about people we BOTH know.  I'd much rather hear about your brother and Pat.  Have they closed on their house?  When are they moving?"
<I am not in the mood to tolerate her anymore!>

Thankfully, before I could get mad and make a fool of myself and have to apologize later, her phone rang and it was her brother and SIL telling her to come home because supper was ready.
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She left and Pearl walked in about 10 minutes later.

"I want you to look out your bathroom window.  Merle is in the back yard.  Just look at him and tell me what you think."

So I did and came back in the living room.

"He looks really, really sick to me, Pearl.  He is bent over and kind of dragging his feet when he walks--like he can't lift his legs and is shuffling."

"I know!  He is in terrible pain and sleeps all the time. He gets home from work, goes to sleep, eats supper, goes to sleep, I wake him up and he goes to bed.  What is wrong with him?"

"He also looks like he's lost weight."

"Yes...about fifteen pounds."

"Fifteen pounds?  He was skinny to begin with, he can't afford to lose any weight!  I think he should quit working."

"Oh--I forgot to tell you...he did put in his resignation.  He is going to quit at the end of October and not go back to work next spring."

"Why wait that long?"

"Because he wants that unemployment to get through winter."

<I had so many words, but I didn't want to say them. Then, she said them for me>

"Judy, I think he has cancer!"

"I do too.  When does he go for the test on his kidneys?"

"The last week of this month."

"Well, he's going to a urologist and he is going to have an ultra sound and an MRI, right?"

"Yes."

"I think they will probably finally find out what is wrong."

"Well, he's got to work until the end of October, no matter what they find out.  We need that unemployment."

"No you don't!  You won't have it next fall, you can learn this year how to get along without it."

"But...we need it!"

"Well, if they find out something really bad, he won't be going back to work.  He will be in a hospital!"

"I sure didn't expect my life to be like this."

"What?  We are getting old.  What did you expect?"

"He's always been so strong...and now...he's just so weak and not good for anything.  I didn't expect that. He doesn't even help me anymore.  He doesn't even talk to me anymore and he's grouchy all the time!"

"Well...he's seventy eight years old and he's in pain and tired and probably worried about his health."

"I'm the same age he is and I don't act like that!"

"Men age faster then we do."

"I know he has cancer!  I wonder what kind?  Remember, they couldn't find a thing wrong with him last year."

"He may have bladder cancer...or kidney cancer.  He didn't have an MRI of those organs.  Those cancers can grow slowly and for a couple of years before they show up with bad symptoms.  Don't jump to any conclusions.  Wait for the tests."

"Well, he has to work until the end of October, no matter what!"
<sigh>
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After Pearl left, I decided I needed a treat, so I ordered myself a pizza delivery.  It gets costly because I order 5 toppings, but I only get one every month or so.  I was delish!!!

Then my sister called and we talked for almost an hour, which is no big deal for us.  She has heard no news from up the road, but did say that 3 neighbors have asked Chuck, so I guess pretty soon, I can talk about it here because soon, everyone will know.

Then Maisey and John were on the porch, so I went out for a porch-chat, until the skeeters became too much of a nuisance.

Now--I will play a couple of games on FB, take my Melatonin and go to bed and have a nice sleep.  

Tomorrow morning--I walk to the lake and back again!!  No matter how much it hurts!  Oh Yes I will--dammit!!!

A Lovely Sunday.

Maisey stopped by for a porch-chat today--Sunday.  She had a lot of things to tell me.  Like Cecil the Lion's brother had also been killed. Not So!  That Hummingbirds catch migration rides down south under the wings of Geese.  What?  Geese and Hummingbirds don't go to the same place for winter.  Not So!  Also Maisey thinks that autumn begins Labor Day. Not So!  It begins on or the day before or after September 21st.

I don't argue with Maisey, she has a lot of myths and things she truly believes.  If it were a matter of life or death, I might correct her, but............................................not worth it.  "Really?" is the best response.

I had a lovely chat with my Wee Sister.  We talked of many things--feelings, ponderings, events.  It is always nice to have someone who understands me so well--and doesn't criticize or condemn my feelings, but will on occasion, if needed, say, "What?  Really?  I don't agree."

It was quite warm today, but with low humidity.  The warm is so different without high humidity.  No need for A/C with the nice westerly breeze coming in ALL windows and front door.  The weather-man says this is the last hot day.  We are turning toward autumn and cooler temps--especially at night.  We have had a lovely summer.

Sunday, I mostly sat inside watching movies or H2 or a baseball game.  Our Detroit Tigers are really PIT-EE-FULL this year, but I watch, if there is nothing more interesting on the tube.  Saw a great movie on H2 about "Revelation--The End Times."  I dig that kind of thing.  I enjoy reading and watching apocalyptic stuff.  I don't watch stuff about Aliens--ancient, past, present, or future.  I just don't believe there is life on other planets.  At least not alien people.

I do get quite a bit of crocheting and cross stitching done while watching TV.  I just can't sit and watch!  I get to fidgety.  I need to have my hands busy.  I once was working on a big Angel cross stitch picture while watching an MSU basketball game.  The next day, I realized I had left out about 10 rows of stitches in the midst of the pattern!  The slowness of watching baseball is much more conducive for cross stitching.
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My minister, Pastor Lewis, from the Howell United Methodist Church, married the Pastor Sherry Parker, from the Brighton United Methodist Church.  He is a widower, she never married.

Do you remember when I told you, 3.5 years ago when he did Fred's funeral, that I thought he was in his late sixties?  Found out later, he is only 56!!

Cute, Huh?

I Shoulda Known!!

Mitzi in Byron Center, please send me an e-mail
jjmiller6213@comcast.net
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Today is Karen's youngest, Madeleine Sophia's, 19th birthday.  I call her, Precious Girl.  The years slip by so quickly!

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When I was a little girl and actually on, until I got overly positive with life, at around 70, I would never make statements about anything really good.  I figured if it was good and if I acknowledged it, it would soon go all wrong.  I didn't know about "fate" back then, nor do I really believe in it now, but in January, when I proclaimed to the world: "I am so glad this is an odd numbered year, because they are always the best for me. "   

 I shoulda known! 
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My daughter Karen stopped in for a visit, on her way to her dental appointment.  I just flat out asked her--told her I had a bad feeling about (her daughter) my second grand daughter and her husband.  I was right. Trouble in Paradise, way out there in Oregon.   

CRAP!

Second question--because I have had a bad feeling about my youngest, Jen and her husband.  "Are they separated?"

"Not yet."

CRAP!

Third question--because I got wind of something and had, not a bad feeling, but a worried one.

"How did Pammie's skin biopsy turn out?"

"Oh.  I didn't know you knew.  It was fine.  She's all right."

THANK YOU GOD!!

Fourth question--she filled me in on the latest.  Worse than I thought.

CRAP!!

Remember me telling you when the girls got together two weeks ago?  I knew darn well something was afoot!!

It is better for me to know what is going on, instead of having these bad, worrisome intuitions.  When I know, I become much more able to cope and become tougher and stronger!
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So--it is as it is!  Life gets hard and sucks a lot of the time.  BUT--life can be good, most of the time.  We just have to get through the sucky times, not make any rash decisions, not go off half-cocked out of emotional feelings.
<keep telling yourself that Jude>

Pray for strength and just keep going--Onward & Upward--Ever Forward!

WOW!

A really nice day!

Thanks for the support you have given, via e-mails.  Glad to know I'm not the only one who would feel hurt as the MAMA!  You know, sometimes I feel like I am losing a grip and my mental state isn't all it should be.  Like perhaps I am reacting oddly.  Then I get a comment or a message from someone who  says, "Yeah, I feel the same way," and that lets me know.  Well, it lets me know either that others are also losing their grip with mental stability or as woman, you all can identify.  It's comforting no matter which way.  LOL

Pearl came down for a nice hour long porch-chat.  She was on her way to visit Jackie, but stopped in here first because Jackie was napping.  We had a great talk.  Giggled a lot and out-right laughed. 

"Oh, your Azalea's are so pretty."

"Azaleas?"

"Yes--those bushes behind you."

"Those are Rose of Sharon bushes."

"I get them mixed up."

"Azalea flowers are much smaller."

"Oh I know!  Just drop it!"

"And they don't bloom this time of year."

"Yes, I know!  Just drop it!"

"And Azalea bushes this tall usually only grow down south."

"Okay.  DROP IT!"

"These flowers remind me of Holly Hocks--which I can't grow."

"OKAY!  We will call them Rose of Sharon Holly Bushes!"

"Okay."
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Just like my BFF, back in the day, Pearl and I can go back and forth and tell each other when we think the other is being stupid and it is all right.  It has taken a while, she is overly sensitive, but I think we are finally there and it is great!!
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"By the way," she said.  "My three kids are getting along with each other---finally after all these years."

"That is great!"

"Yeah--they still don't like me too much and never tell me much, but at least they like each other.  At least at this exact moment."

"My kids all like each other.  It's me that a couple of them have a problem with."

"Did I ever tell you that six years ago, our son Vic had a heart attack and was in the hospital two days before anyone thought to call and tell us...his parents?"

 "No--I didn't know that.  Why are kids like that?"

"We didn't guilt them enough....like our parents did us."

"Yeah.  I guess."
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One of the e-mails I got today was a real surprise.  A woman, who has been reading the blog for awhile, told me her name and where she lived.  She said she had commented before and then I remembered.  

Earlier this year, she told me the name of the Chinese restaurant, up in Howell,  that I was trying to remember.  Come to find out, her Mother lives directly across the street from me in the Condos and goes to the church where my Jennifer and family used to go.  Also, this woman, lives in a new LOG HOUSE directly on the road I drive on every time I go up to my home town, Byron, and The Farm!!  I've probably seen it and oohhed and aahhed, but now I will be sure and look for it.  

Now--how cool is that?  What a coincidence--or not.  I think there are NO coincidences in life.  Things happen for a reason--good things anyway!!

Then I got another e-mail from a reader that lives WAAAAAY out in Washington State.  I know she has been reading for awhile, but she doesn't often comment so I had no clue who she was or where she lived.  She told me a bit about her life.  We have similarities!

I LOVE THESE KIND OF CONNECTIONS!!!

It is also very good for my OCD.  I have made a list in EXCEL of all my readers, that I know of, and where they live and if they also have a blog.  If--on my right side-bar, I see in my Feed-Jit that someone from Ontario, or Oregon, or Washington, or Ann Arbor have visited but left no comment, I can look at my list and....."YAY!  Kathy, Dawn, Margie came by today."  Fills my heart way up to the top!!!

Again

I have said this before, but it needs to be said again.

It never ceases to amaze me how the blogosphere is such a close knit group.  I always get so much support and comfort from you ladies.  More than from friends I see everyday.  Weird, isn't it.  Thank you again!!
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Jackie (nice woman) who lives across the street had knee replacement surgery Monday.  She came home yesterday afternoon!!!  She lives alone, but her grand girl is staying with her.  She decided not to go to rehab.  I visited her for a bit this morning.  

She can't control the pain.  Her pain meds scare her so she won't take them.  She can barely walk to the bathroom.  NOW--if she were in rehab, they would monitor her, help her to the bathroom, check on her every hour, bring her food, on and on.  She is 78 years old.  

I was awake early this morning--garbage truck roar woke me at 7:20.  Got up, fed the kids, staggered in here and saw Darlene walk over to Jackies.  Nice of her to check on Jackie.  Darlene was smoking, she stood on the driveway for awhile, then bent down to snub out her cigarette, walked over to one of Jackie's plant containers, and buried her cigarette butt in the pot.

Is this woman entirely clueless to the fact that this fall, when Jackie cleans up her annuals, and cleans out the dirt in the pot, she will find that cigarette butt?  Is there enough nicotine in that butt to kill the roots on the pretty tangerine Tuberose Begonia that blooms so prettily in that pot?

When Dar goes for a walk, she always smokes and when done with her ciggie, she just throws the butt down on the street.  In front of someones driveway?  So what!

She used to smoke on her way over here and I'd watch at she threw the butt on my lawn.  The first time I saw that, I asked her not to do that again.  

"What am I supposed to do with the butt?"

"Drag is on the cement to get the ash and residue off.  You have only the filter left.  Roll it and put it into your pocket until you get home and throw it away!"

The last time I went to supper with her, the second we came out of the restaurant, she lit up.  She wanted to take a walk down the sidewalk to look into some store windows.  She just casually walked along, expelling her smoke as she strolled, whether other people were next to her or not.  I didn't even want to be seen with her!!!!!!!  When she was done, she flipped the butt out onto the parking lot.

Of course, I did tell you about the time I had to take her to the ER and on the way out, me pushing her in a wheel chair, she lit up while we were still in the lobby!!!  I said, "You can't smoke in here!"

"Well, hurry up and get me outside."
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Ya know what?  The more I am around that woman, the more I dislike her!  She is becoming even more bossy, boastful, and pushy since she got her Union Rep job where she works!

The other day, I was over to her yard, talking to Pat her SIL, whom I adore, about the garden she was working on.  Dar kept butting in to tell Pat things like, "Oh Judy doesn't like to do that."  "Judy is the kind of person who wouldn't....."   "Judy feels like..........".

I so wanted to say, "Look, I am not a five year old that you have to tell Pat how I think, act or feel!  You don't know me as well as you think!"

But of course I didn't, but I saw Pat roll her eyes, when Dar was distracted and not looking.  She does it when I am present around her and another friend of hers--she has two.  I think I just might say that next time, because the temperament and mood I am in these days, I just do not suffer fools very well!
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I worked on this bulletin board/collage picture thingie I have in this room.  I have put it back together about 4 times in the last 12 years.  After awhile, the photos fall out.  This time, I put a tiny drop of Elmer's glue behind each one.  Maybe they will stay in place longer?

Today it was so nice and cool with low humidity--until about 1:00.  I dead-headed the annuals, and checked on the perennials, washed out my garbage can and sat on my porch for awhile.

Maisey stopped by this morning, for a pet and a treat.  John was with her, but he didn't get a pet or a treat.  We had a nice chat however, while Maisey nosed the screen on the front door and Maggie The Cat nosed the other side.  I was amazed Maggie didn't run away.

I was trying to be nice, so I asked John where I could buy a new garbage can with wheels.  (As if I didn't know!)  He told me he bought his at Lowes, it is square, with wheels, and a handle, with a locking lid    "I think I paid around twenty bucks for it."

"Okay.  Thanks.  I love Lowes.  I will check there."

He SOOOOOOOO needs to feel needed and useful---maybe I made his day?  I should have given him a $20 and asked if he'd run up to Lowe's and get me one.  I know he would have--he is so easy to take advantage of.  However, my independent self would not allow that! LOL

Wednesday

It IS Wednesday.

While most of you know that, with no sleep Monday night and in an emotional and mental fog yesterday...I don't even remember going to bed. When I woke up this morning, the first thing I saw was my "day reminder" hanging on the bedroom closet door.

Thankfully, John called and said, "Remember to get your garbage out tonight.  The guys are coming at seven in the morning now.  I don't want to see you out there, still in your nightie, dragging your garbage pail down the street, trying to catch up with the garbage truck!"

"Oh.  Is it Wednesday?"

"Yes.  Are you feeling better today?"

"Yes.  Thanks for reminding me.  See ya."

"Oh wait--remember not to use the water today.  They are flushing out the wells and the water pipes.  All you'll get is rusty water."

"Yes.  Thanks.  I DID remember that."  HAH

I went into the bedroom and flipped the card over to Wednesday.  It IS Wednesday.
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Look at this.  My best Buddy.  He's looking out the east window--keeping an eye on the Wiccans' next door.  Ever vigilant.

He came and stood by my chair and meowed, it sounded like, Mom?"

When I stood up, he trotted over to his food area and sat down by the water bowl and meowed again.

I walked over and looked down, the water bowl was completely dry.  I must have forgotten to fill it last night before I went to bed AND this morning when I fed them.  GEEZ!!!

Not wanting to give either one of my kids water from the tap, I filled the bowl with bottled water.

See how he drinks from the opposite side of the bowl?  Apparently he doesn't want to get his nose wet, so he laps from the other side and gets his chin wet.  He must have drank for 15 minutes.

Then he jumped up on the couch and took a nap in the sun.

All these years of having pets, I didn't know it was possible to love an animal so much!
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This was posted on Face Book this morning.

"August 8.  Can't wait.  I'm going!"

In Detroit.

At least they have the decency not to have this peculiar event on a Sunday.

This statue was recently shown in Detroit also.  

"The Satanic Temple of Detroit revealed a new, 9-ft.-tall statue of Baphomet at a ticketed event shortly before midnight on July 25. Hundreds of supporters turned out for the show and cheered and chanted "Hail Satan" when the statue was unveiled. 

About 100 protesters showed up Saturday afternoon to challenge the statue, claiming it was "disrespectful" to other religions. Jex Blackmore, the director of the Satanic Temple of Detroit,described the Temple as "non-theistic" to WJBK-TV and said the participants do not celebrate "the Judeo-Christian representation of Satan." 

The group originally planned to display the monument on the Oklahoma State Capitol grounds next to a monument of the Ten Commandments, as an objection to the placing of a religious monument on government property. Blackmore said Saturday the statue would be transported to Arkansas next – earlier this year, Governor Asa Hutchinson signed a bill authorizing a Ten Commandments monument near the state Capitol."
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Living next door to these people is a real test of my belief in "religious freedom." 

It's Complicated

Bad day--heavy, really heavy, bad stuff going on that I can't write about.  Oh--I'd like too, but it is a confidential thing.  Someday, I will be able to lay it out here.

I went down to Pearl's to talk with her about it and fixed her computer while I was there.  I knew how Pearl would react.  Just listen and NOT give advice or try and fix it--just what I needed.

Later, up to Wal-Mart to get some cat food, as they were completely out and they kept looking at me like they might attack and take out a bite of meat.

When I got home, I couldn't take a chance on Dear Dar bothering me, so I put a sign on my door, "No Company, Please", and I took a nap.

John and Maisey stopped in for a Porch Chat for an hour.  It was nice until the skitters tried to carry us away.

Fire Flies drive Maisey crazy.   She's scared of them.

The bad/heavy stuff hasn't/won't go away for a long time, but I feel better tonight.

It is all in God's hands!