Tentatively Peeking Out At The World

Today's high temperature was:  46 degrees

Partly sunny--quite breezy

Frost on the rooftops every morning now.

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Breakfast every morning since I was 15.

Note--I even have the bunny spoon I use.

Put cup with milk in microwave, push 1 2 3, hit go--perfect temperature

Sometimes a dollop of marshmallow creme on top--as I had this morning.

As Farfel would say, 

"N E S T L E S--Nestle's makes the very best

Chook-lit!"

(then he snap his jaws shut.)

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I am experiencing a new thing in my life--procrastination.  I hope it is a fleeting issue.

I think about something that needs doing, like dusting, vacuuming, going to the store--and think, "I don't feel like it.  I will do it tomorrow."  Then tomorrow arrives, and the same feeling. 

I did not go to church on Sunday--did not go anywhere on Saturday.  Only went out for two hours with Andrew on Monday evening and that seemed like a real effort--until I did it.  A call--prescriptions waiting for me at Wal-Mart--last Friday!  Another call on Monday to remind me.  I decided to go Tuesday--but didn't.  Another call to remind me.

Yesterday was a perfect day for a nap.  It was dark, very windy and raining all day long.  At 2:00, I kicked my recliner back to get a nap--then said "NO!"  Put my shoes on, found my old raincoat and jumped into the car.

Up to Wal-Mart and saw that the summer long construction on the intersection is all done!!!  Beautiful!  Got the prescriptions and took my bottles back.  The store seemed a bit cleaner and didn't smell--too bad.

Back in the car, across the highway to the Meijer's store.  Went in on the Pharmacy end and walked clear to the back, looking at things along the way--picking up some photo paper, suet blocks for the birds and back to the Soda Pop area where Pepsi products were 10 for 10 with the 11th one free.  Loaded up.  Back out to the car.  It was raining like mad, the wind blew my hair straight up on top of my head.  Rain falling down my neck as I struggled to the car and then blowing in my face as I loaded up my trunk.

Home and backed in close to the porch so I could unload.  Pearl called, "Are you nuts?  Going out in this kind of weather?"

"Oh well...I needed something to get me out of the house."

.....and...I felt better last night.

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Had terrible nightmares during the night.  I woke up kicking and swinging my arms and yelling.  Fighting with ghosts, I suppose.  Sub-conscious anger coming out at the step-mother?  Weird, because in my "normal" state, I am not a confronter/arguer/fighter.  Suppressed rage will come out--one way or another.

Woke up again at 8:00--Buddy was patting my face and nudging my shoulder--touching my chin with his wet, cold nose. 

Dar came over a couple hours later.  She's a mess--probably not any worse then me.  She got in trouble at work for telling the young manager he didn't know what he was doing.  She got in trouble at church for confronting the young woman who testified that Dar was seen abusing her grandchildren.  Apparently the Pastor told Dar that "church is not the place to be berating another person."  She's gained almost twenty pounds and is angry about that.  She wants to sell her place and move to North Carolina (oh, please do.)  Her neighbor's dog acted like he was going to bite her because he came to the steps when she was sweeping them and she hit him with the broom.  She bought a real expensive garbage can (I told her to buy a cheap one because they get so abused by the garbage men) and the first week, they put the garbage can upside down on the ground and bent the attached cover.  She will report them to the office.  

I don't remember--there was more with pacing up and down my living room and flinging her arms around during her rant.  Then--she was done--and off she went.

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I don't seem to have much of interest to say lately.  I will sign off now and talk tomorrow.--Jude

Wordless Wednesday

I got this image off the net because I didn't have my camera

It pulled into the gas station in front of me.

I had to get out and talk to the salesman and tell him I LOVE Nesquik!

Have it every morning for my breakfast.

Time Change

Today's high temperature was: 52

Cloudy and grey

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I am old enough to remember when we didn't have the time change.  We just stayed on Eastern Standard Time all year long.  The seasons changed, as they should, with earlier darkness at night and later darkness in the morning.

My Daddy was a farmer.  He had about 50 Holstein cows.  Dairy cows need to be milked twelve hours apart.  If they aren't milked regularly, every day, they can get mastitis, which is a disease of the udder.  Imagine, if my Daddy milked his cows at 5:00 one night and then the time changed and he had to milk them at clock time of 4:00 the next morning.  Or, in the spring, at 6:00 the next morning.

So for him, and most farmers, the time change in spring and fall meant more work for them and a real change in their schedule.  Starting a few weeks before the time change, Daddy would have to either move back or move up his milking schedule--a few minutes each day.  I remember him ignoring it one year--he NEVER even changed his wrist watch!  Off course, this threw off our schedule for breakfast and supper.  If he had a township board meeting, he had to remember what time it was, according to his wrist watch.

When our State voted on changing from EST to DST, it was voted down.  But--you know how government is--the Governor at the time, put it into effect.  For years all I heard was how the farmers wanted the time change to be able to get more done in the daylight hours at night.  THIS IS NOT TRUE!!!

The time change, at least in this State, was pushed through by the auto workers unions who wanted more daylight hours after they got off 1st shift work.

I remember how difficult it was to get my kids on a different waking and sleeping schedule.  Now--I am going through the same thing with my cats.  Normally, I feed them their night time snack at 9:00 at night.  With the "fall back" time change, they start pestering me at "clock time" 8:00.  I have been trying to ease them later a few minutes each night.

In the spring, they will be pestering me in the morning to get fed an hour earlier then "clock time".

Last night, as I was driving Andrew home, he said, "Look outside.  It's pitch black and it isn't even six o'clock yet!".  

Not good for a grandma who has trouble driving after dark!!!
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I don't feel like doing much of anything lately.  I had my shoes on this afternoon to go to Wal-Mart to get a prescription and to Meijer's to buy Diet Pepsi, which is on sale for $1.00 for 2 liter jug.  Then I remembered my prescription will not be ready until tomorrow morning, so I just took my shoes off and came in here and did some more work on researching self-publishing.

I have no ambition.  Lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about Fred.  It's been over 22 months since he died.  I went for long periods of time when I didn't think of him for days.  Now, it seems, he is all that is my mind.  So--I get distracted--thought I was over that foggy feeling.  I don't even remember going to bed last night.  I don't remember what time I got up this morning.  I hate this feeling!!!  Hated it for the first few months after he died, but knew about it and expected it.  Now?  I shouldn't be having this.

I was in the bathroom this morning and I had the feeling that he was sitting in his recliner in the living room.  I was so tempted to step out into the hall and peek around the corner.  I KNEW he wasn't there.  But it "felt" like he was.  I didn't look.  I got my toothbrush and brushed my teeth.  I went back into the bedroom and got dressed.  I made the bed.  Then, I walked out into the kitchen and I didn't look toward the living room.

I don't know why I am getting these feelings now.  I can feel like he is near--and I know, that cannot be.  If I "feel" he is near, it is something my own mind has conjured up because dead people do not come back with their spirits flitting around us.  Their souls are gone to another place and if that place is Heaven, they couldn't care less what is happening back here.  

Scary Kid!

Today's high temperature was:  46 degrees

Cloudy

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While I prefer the "fall back", rather then the "spring ahead", these time changes always mess with my Circadian Clock and I am discombobulated for a few days--a week.

I like waking up in the morning, thinking it's 8:00 and seeing the clock say 7:00--early for me.  However at night, it is real dark at 5:00 but I am ready for bed and the clock says only 9:00.  My cat's get their nightly treat at 9:00, so now, Buddy starts complaining at clock time, 8:00.  Such a mess.

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I walked up to Pearl's and we had a good chat this morning.  She is finally going to get a new computer and wants me to go along to help with what she needs.  We decided to go to the movie this Friday--I want to see "Last Vegas" and she agreed.  I need to see a funny movie where I can laugh and laugh.  The time change does not bother her in the least.

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Went to the dentist for my 4 month cleaning at 2:40.  Today the hygienist decided we needed to "chart" the depth of my "pockets"--that is always unpleasant because I have about 4 teeth with deep pockets and when she puts that sharp metal instrument to measure them--it touches the nerve and has me jumping.  She finally got done, I was sweating, a tear had rolled out of the corner of my left eye and she was busy apologizing.  Hey--it has to be done and my teeth are beautifully clean from the ultra sound cleaning tool AND some nice scraping!

I had to get home as Pammie was dropping Andrew off so he and I could go out shopping and supper for his birthday.  He was 12 yesterday.

This kid scares me!  I mean really.   We had a fantastic talk--we forget to eat we were talking so much--which is great--when I could understand him.

He is going to go to MIT for college.  Jen has a couple of clients that are big wigs at MIT and they have sent Andrew a paper with the requirements he will need.  One of the projects he is working on now--building a super computer that will only be used for gaming.  He explained how it worked and the components he needed--and lost me about fifteen minutes into the explanation.  

(Remember?  He is the one who invented a marshmallow toaster when he was 4--and it worked great!!!)

Then we had a conservation on Global Warming--did I believe it or not.  I tried to explain to him that Mimi is not a black or white person.  There are a lot of grey areas in life and yes--I did believe in Global Warming, but I am also convinced it is also part of a Geological sequence that comes around every few centuries.  We talked of how the glaciers are disappearing and I told him I had seen that with my own eyes out in the Teton Mountains, but it could also be a Geological cycle.  Global warming may occur and then we will probably have an Ice Age--as the earth has undergone before.  

He said, "There is a girl in my class from California--she has that kind of accent.  She said, "My Mom doesn't believe in global warming and...like... neither do I."  How can she be that dumb?  To just take her parent's viewpoint and look at the scientific proof.  Science never lies!"

So I said, "Well of course your parent's have a lot more experience then you do and they are more educated and know more about life.  You need to respect their views.  You will find out as you get older, that they are really quite smart.  But...you will also come up with your own views as you get older.  You will find your own beliefs and that is the way it should be."

"Yeah, but...can't she see the scientific data?"

"I know...it is probably difficult for you to be with other kids that aren't quite as smart as you are.  There are all different kinds of people.  Some are really smart in math and science and some are really smart in writing and spelling.  How are you in writing and spelling."

"Not too bad.  The teacher can't read my writing and, sometimes I mess up in spelling."

"Well--you are a "left brain" person.  I am heavy in the right brain things.  See how my head always tilts to the right?"

He laughed.

Then he asked, "Do you have Windows 8 on your computer?"

"Nope."

"What are you using.  Vista?"

"Nope.  I still use XP."

"XP!  Mimi--that was around when I was a little kid!  You really need to download Windows 8."

"I thought they were having problems with it."

"No.  They got them all fixed.  What do you use your computer for?"

"Nothing real scientific.  Games on Face Book.  I use Excel for spreadsheets."

"What kind of spreadsheets?"

"Oh--lots.  I have one for my checking account.  I keep track of my expenditures in my check register in my check book and then also on a spreadsheet and the two have to match, along with the checking account balance at the bank. I have one where I put the results of my blood tests--year after year, so I can compare them.  I am doing research for a friend right now.  I have spreadsheets with the information on them.  I am trying to find out what it really costs me to live each month, so I have just made a spreadsheet to track my November expenditures--down to the penny."

"That's...well...kind of obsessive...isn't it?"

"Yes.  I do have an obsessive nature."

"Yeah...me too.  I like things very organized."

"Well, I think you come by that genetically.  If we don't have to wash our hands fifty times a day, I guess we are all right." 

Then I asked him, as a scientist, how could he put science and religion together.  Was he an Atheist?  Of course not--he explained it all to me very simply and very logically and how of course there was a Big Bang, but that was when God created the earth.  That he has read many biographies of scientist, who were Atheist's and then through study and proofs, have turned to Christianity--that's the word he used not religion or God, but Christianity.  

Then we talked politics.  I told him of how my interest in politics and the workings of government started when I was his age.  He kind of wrinkled up his nose and said, "All I see about politics is people wanting to fight each other and not compromise a bit.  They want to blame each other instead of working together to find a way to fix things."  (12 years old!)

Then I asked about his school and church--he had some views about religion that I could tell were very Lutheran--seeing's as how he goes to Lutheran school and church, it was expected.  He is quite a spiritual boy.  Then he told me that now, he sits in the balcony and runs the technical side of the service--the computer system, sound system, video system.  12 years old.

What scares me about Andrew--he is so smart.  His mind is constantly thinking of inventions, how to do things, science questions.  I want him to be more well rounded.  He does like football and baseball and soccer, but I am afraid he will be perceived as a real nerd.  He wants to be the next Steve Jobs!  His manners are impeccable--he is very polite, holding the doors open for me, talking to the waiter very grown-up like and thanking him.  He speaks up and doesn't mumble.  

Maybe I am just worried.  I just don't want him to be one of those "know it all" kids!  He seems way to mature for his age--a lot like his mother was at that age.  I don't want him growing up to be a snob!!

I'm 5'10"--how tall is he?

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Oh well--I had a wonderful evening with him.  An amazing evening actually--a conversation like I would have with an adult friend.

Next week, I am taking Elise out for supper and see what is going on in her life.  Much different I imagine.  Probably all drama and girl gossip--like a typical nine year old.  I sure hope so!!    

  

Victory For MSU!!

Michigan State University--29     

University of Michigan - 6

Ever Forward

Today's high temperature was: 51 degrees

Rainy, very windy, cloudy

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Well--what do you do?  

Being betrayed.  

Knowing you were a sucker.  

Knowing you were too trusting--again.

Apparently, she took her own money, her investments and she locked them in place in a trust, not even using the interest.  Then for the last five years, she had a money market, checking and savings account--our money from Daddy's estate, and that is what she lived on.  Her $3,000 a month retirement condo, all new furniture for that condo, her trips, her mani-pedi's, her daughter's trips, a new diamond ring setting, bi-monthly massages;  her girls as the beneficiaries on those accounts.

What do you do when there is absolutely nothing you can do?

You can become angry.  You can rage and scream and cry and pound a hole in the wall...throw a chair through the window--none of it will change a thing.

You can hold that anger and thoughts of revenge inside.  You can become cynical, bitter and hold the grudge for the rest of your life.  Allowing all those feelings to ruin the rest of your life.

OR

You can take a deep breathe--put it behind you and continue on--forward, with hope and faith in the knowledge that God will continue to take care of you.

...and that's all of this matter I will ever post.

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I didn't think I wanted a quilt or a flowered fabric over my insulated back door.  I am not a flowery person and don't like a lot of "fou fou" in my house.  So--I took a Queen size flat sheet, folded it in half and tacked it to the top of the door.  It blends in with the walls and make me feel a lot better. At least I don't have to stare at insulation backing for the next four months!  Plus, the writing on the backing was upside down and you know what that will do to an obsessive person?  Drive her nuts!!!

So yesterday morning, I drove up to The Farm.  My cousin came in from a town west of here and met my sister and me there and then we all piled into the cousin's car and drove up to Frankenmuth to pick up another cousin and go out for lunch.  As you may or may not know, Frankenmuth, Michigan is a little town, famous for it's year round Christmas store, other neat stores and two wonderful restaurants, known for their chicken dinners.  My mother and I used to always go shopping there during deer season--while the men are away, Frankenmuth is bustling with women.  We ate at the Bavarian Inn--I had been contemplating a nice dish of fried chicken livers, which is just what I had.  They were delish and completely over priced.

Afterwards, we all went downstairs to the bakery to get some Stollen bread and the Frankenmuth cousin bought a lemon meringue pie and we went back to her house for desert.

We did not stop at the Christmas store on our way out of town, which was a great disappointment to me as I haven't been there in years, but I was already tired from all the walking and really just wanted to get home.

Sister Susan requested the lady play "Roll Out The Barrel," 

which she did and we all sang along--robustly!

Cousin Carolyn, Sister, Cousin Yvonne, Moi.

(Gosh--I look like my mother!)

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I got home at dark, and it was rainy, but I didn't have too much of a problem driving.  Last night was Halloween and since I detest that "holiday" with every fiber in my body, I did not turn on my porch light.  We only had one car come through anyway.  The most trick or treaters I have ever had here in 10 years was 4, so no one missed out.  Everyone around here knows this is the old people's side of the park and we don't do trick or treat.

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Unfortunately, (YAY) because I didn't get home until late, I missed the wedding of Tami and her live in, next door.  Both of these people are beyond weird and their main holiday is Halloween.  They had rented a large barn/pumpkin farm/haunted house for their reception.  They got married in the Howell cemetery.  She claims he is her Barnabas (he had a black tux and ruffled white shirt on) and she is his Rosette, and they will live together past eternity.  This is one of their pictures, taken in front of some family's small mausoleum.

Their whole wedding based around undead spirits flitting about, the devil coming up out of the ground, witches and ghosts, Zombies and darkness.  How lovely.  

Apparently a Wiccan or Warlock married them--I don't 

know for sure.

She now wishes to be addressed as---

Not Tamara, nor Tami--but, Ta-MAR-ah.

Which of course means Pearl, Dar, Jackie and I will continue to call her Tami, LOL.

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Today, I put my huge bundles of stuff from Costco away--I have a large box of Zip Lock Freezer bags store in my bedroom closet!  I made a big pot of Chili and froze most of it and I made my tuna/macaroni casserole and froze all of it and next week, I will start my production of 30 quarts of spaghetti sauce for my "boy's" Christmas gift.

Tomorrow is the BIG GAME in this state--MSU vs U of M.  I have been trash talking on Face Book about how (U of M) Wolverines are members of the weasel family and that is why we call them Nasty Weasels and how a Spartan can take down a Nasty Weasel any day.  Of course, my one grandson, and other U of M friends do not disappoint with their trash talk back to me.  I am hoping it is a good game and not a total rout on either side.  We both need to win to be in Bowl contention--as well as bragging rights, so it will be intense.  I've loved this state rivalry since I was 12 and fell in love with MSU--so I will be nervous during the whole game.

  

Wordless