title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Grateful Day #19

Another e-mail from my grandson:

This friday I'm going over to a friend's house, but Monday would be fine!

On Nov 18, 2015 5:19 PM, "Judith Miller" <jjmiller6213@comcast.net> wrote:
What do you have going this Friday after school?

If not Friday, how about next Monday or Tuesday?
I will pick him up around 4:00 :-)

Today I had lunch with my Old School Gal Pals.  Quite a distance away.  Well, really not that far, but it seemed like it.  35.7 miles one way.  That's the most I have driven in months. :-)  A nice surprise, my BFF Arlene's daughter stopped in with her daughter and grandson, just so I could meet him.  My BFF's first great grandchild.  He is 11 months old and we fell in love immediately.  While we were eating, he kept pulling on my shirt, wanting me to pick him out of the high chair.  While I was holding him, I tried to pass him off to his mother and he turned toward me and snuggled his head in my shoulder and wouldn't let go of me.

I don't know if I mentioned here, a couple of months ago, how I physically longed to hold a baby in my arms.  He isn't quite a baby, but holding him seemed to do the trick.  He wiggled so much, I was worn out.  LOL

Tears after they left.  I miss Arlene so much and it makes me sad and a bit angry that she died just a few months before her grand daughter's wedding.  She was trying to hang on so hard, just to be at the wedding.  Anger that she never got to see and snuggle with this adorable little boy.

Anyway, it was lots of love from them.  Hugs and shared tears and I love yous.  Truly something to be grateful for.  I can't tell you much of what else was going on around me.  I did hear that one of our friends is in the hospital, recently in ICU and barely made it.  Apparently, she had a bowel blockage, but it or something, led to her not being able to breathe and problems with her heart.  Plus, her mind was very bad.  I suppose that could be caused by not enough oxygen.

We just go along, minding our own business, living a nice life and BAM, we get sick and die in a matter of a few days.  Another reason I am grateful every morning when I wake up and I'm still here.  As my BFF used to say, even when she was dying, "As long as I'm on the top side of the sod, it's a good day."

I didn't get out to The Farm on the way home.  By the time I drove out there, it would be time to head home before it got dark, so I called my Lil' Sister and explained.  Then, on the way home, I drove through my home town for a few minutes and headed on home.  Got here at 4:45--it gets dark by 5:15 nowadays.

I had to do something tonight that I didn't think I'd ever do.  I have a Face Book "friend"--I have only met her twice and that was 10 years ago.  I will call her Lynn, because that is her name.

She is a very Intolerant Liberal--the kind that preaches tolerance, but does not practice it.  She can't take an opinion that doesn't agree with her political leanings.  She likes to ridicule me on some of my political posts.  She wants to argue.  She says I am "hate filled" and once called me a "racist" because I disagree with the President's policies.  She uses crude language.  

If any of my other "friends" make a comment on my post, she gets into arguments with them.  I don't care how she rags on me, but to get into long winded "comment" fights with my other friends, really bothers me.  Plus, I believe it is so against etiquette.  Aren't you just supposed to comment on the original post and not what others comment?

I have her restricted so I don't see any of her posts.  I made a mild comment on one of her posts, years ago, and three of her "friends", commented that #1: I was stupid.  #2: I was a racist.  #3:  I was so ignorant that I had no business even commenting on her post.  YIKES.  These tolerant Liberals are kind of scary.

So, today while I was away from home, there was a lot of activity about a joke link I had posted.  She and another of my younger friends apparently were going back and forth with each other.The younger friend thought Lynn had disrespected me (which she had) and was standing up for me.  So, Lynn attacked her.

This has been going on for the last few years.  I have decided to block Lynn.  I never thought I'd ever do a thing like that.  It seems impolite, it seems rude.  I try to be nice to everyone.  However, considering the fact that this next year is going to be a heated one, I don't think I want the stress of her rants on my Timeline, on everything I post.  Considering the fact I have only met the woman twice and only for a few minutes each time, and the person we were connected through died five years ago--I shouldn't worry about her feelings.

But I do.   It makes me feel bad.  
This morning, I found out from Karen that Jennifer and Husband have sold their house.  They got what they were asking. $1M.  I guess right now, they are trying to figure out if they should pull the kids out of school and move them to a new one in January, or if Eric will go to NJ, start taking over his Dad's business and start building their house while Jen stays here with the kids so they can finish out this school year.

Personally?  I don't think they should pull the kids out of school mid-year.  It is going to be hard enough on them to start at a brand new school next fall.

It is going to be hardest on Elise.  She is best friends with their next door neighbor girl.  They have known each other since they were 3 and have been in the same class for the last 6 years.

It won't bother Alex a bit.  He is so calm and unperturbed by anything.  He can make friends in half a minute and just goes on.

The little guy Evan, won't know a bit of difference.  The only problem he is having right now, is missing his Aunt Pammie.  He cries almost everyday for her.  Jen texts Pam and tells her how Evan cries for her.  It upsets Pam.  Does Jen think she is showing Pam how much Evan loves and misses her?  She's not doing it in the right way!

I don't know how Andrew feels.  I might find out Monday, without prying too much. He probably will adjust just fine.

I will not be voicing any of my worries to any of them AND NOT to any of the rest of the family.  Keep my mouth shut and just smile and nod and make appropriate noises in my throat.

Is it going to break my heart that they are moving?  Not really.  I haven't been part of their family for nearly three years.  It might make it even easier because now they won't be so close that I feel left out of everything.  They will be far away and that will be a good excuse?

I am anxious to know how Jennifer is going to get along--with a SIL that she can barely tolerate.  A FIL that treats her like she's a "woman" and of no consequence and a MIL that regards Jen like she is her son's wife and thus a slave to the family.  It should be interesting. 

The only REAL concern I have?  Them living on the East Coast and Eric working in Manhattan.    Can anyone say "ISIS"?


  1. Glad you got to hold a baby. I remember you writing about that desire a while ago.

    I don't blame you for blocking someone from your Facebook. I would have done the same thing considering you didn't really know her. I wish I could block the husband of one of my husband's nieces. He's way too judgmental about politics and posts a ton of things conservative 'trash town' I don't appreciate seeing. I took him out of my feed and solved the problem. I like to debate politics but don't think it's a topic for Facebook where friends or families gather. There are better places for that.

  2. I remember Lynn, and agree that it was probably wise of you to block her. Can't tell you how many times I wanted to tell her to "lay off" but didn't want to upset you.

    Hopefully, Jennifer will try to make things right with you before they leave. But, you do seem to have the right attitude about it; even though I know it hurts that the grands will be so far away.


  3. I worried all the time when my son worked in Manhattan. He was in the World Trade Center the day before it came down and was supposed to be there the day after if came down. After that, I was always concerned. I gave him lectures about walking/running in the opposite direction if anything ever happened.

    You have every right to block your "friend." Facebook is the village square of our times. When someone misbehaves, they should be put in the stocks. :) I don't think her attitude has anything to do with her being a liberal, though. I think she's just an obnoxious person who happens to be a liberal. :)

    I hope things work out for Jennifer... for the sake of the kids.

    1. My Jennifer was 7 months pregnant with Andrew and working in the tallest building on Boston's harbor front on 9/11. I could imagine and feared planes flying into that building and was scared to pieces. I couldn't get through to her on the phone those first few hours--very nerve wracking.

  4. I would actually unfriend Lynn if I was you! She's no friend of yours. I've seen her comments on your FB page before and I admire you for being so tolerant of her nastiness all these years! Have fun with Andrew!

  5. how sweet to have that interaction you had longed for. i find them to be quite wiggly at that age!!!

    i have not been on fb for a month because it was no longer fun. it should be, could be fun!!!!

  6. I noticed your comment about your friend's mind, and the possibility that lower oxygen might play a role. In fact, we thought my mother was developing dementia, and developing it quickly. It turned out that it was decreased blood flow to her brain, and when she had a pacemaker implanted, it was like flipping a switch. In about two days, she was back to normal. It was the most amazing thing I've ever witnessed.

    1. Isn't that something? That's why we need to keep our eye on our parent's actions. Or, I should say, my kids need to keep in touch with me so they know if something is wrong--because I would be too sick to figure it out.

  7. Just remember, Facebook should be named Fakebook. It's all fake and therefore useless. That's why people feel free to be rude and crass; the fake quasi-anonymity emboldens them. I've never had an account but my children have in the past, and I know this is true. So whatever you decide to do re the intolerant lib -- and they're ALL intolerant -- don't sweat it. My personal belief is that the less time people spend on Fakebook, the happier they are. I don't mean that as a judgement, just an observation.

    As to your family moving away, I'm sorry but I think it's sad and I think you'll miss them, especially the children. I may have said this before, but your daughter will regret someday her behavior toward you. I hope she'll be happy in New Jersey, despite proximity to her outlaws. That said: I could not live in the same town with my outlaws. Huh-uh. xoxo