YAY! YAY! WHAT A DAY...............

...I HAD!!!
My soon to be grand daughter's bridal shower.I was kind of dreading it--you know, the figuring out what to wear--especially shoes.  I had an Alfred Dunner top of navy and tan, and tan pants, wore a pair of navy heels I had from my work days.  I knew better than to purchase that top--I've tried two other times over the last 20 years, and Alfred Dunner does not bit me right.  Too short--too boxy--looks very grandmotherly, but--hey, that is what I am.

I even managed to put make-up on!  Hell must have frozen over.  I even managed a bit of mascara with my shaky hand.  Except when Karen arrived to pick me up, she said, "I brought mascara to put on you Mom."
"I already have it on.  Doesn't it show?"
"Not really."
"Well, that's because I don't have many eyelashes left.  It's good enough."

That was my first good thing of the day.  Karen picked me up for the ride up into Lansing AND also in the car were Madeleine and Helene and little one Della Helene.  Let the fun begin.   Della started to tear up when she saw me, so I ignored her.  She just loves everyone, except her Great Grandma.

It was an odd place for a shower--a bakery called "Glazed and Confused".  Well, ya know, it's a college city so they have to be hip or clever or something.  No air conditioning, but the front and back doors open for air flow.

Graduation week there.  We had to park a block and a half away.  That is way more than the 200-400 steps I can manage.  The girls were all laden down with boxes of flowers and snacks, and baby, so I told them to go ahead and I mainly just strolled along at my own pace.  I was over half-way there, when I met the girls coming back for their second trip to unload the car.

I got in, got sat down, introduced myself to unknown people and got served a Diet Coke.  Blech!! No diet Pepsi on the premises and no iced tea.  Ice coffee, coffee and Coke products.  I got up to look at some of the photos and the bride's mother tapped me on the shoulder and said, "You must be Gramma Judy?"
"Yes.  I am glad to me you."
"I wanted to introduce you to the other Grandma, my mother, Irene."

We decided to sit together on one of the cushioned seats along the wall.  She said, "I can't sit on hard chairs anymore."

...and, therein started the magic!

As we sat heads close because we could not hear each other over the swirling conversations, we found out---we have so much in common, that, as she mentioned--"are we long lost sisters?"

For two hours we talked--many times the phrase, "I feel the same way", was uttered.  She has been married twice, widowed 6 years ago, finds that living alone is more fun that she ever thought.

We played some of the games, but not the gift Bingo, as I sat there not having filled out my card, I noticed she hadn't either.  "Aren't you going to play?"

"I hate  Bingo," she said.
"Me too!" I answered.
"How are we going to share an apartment in the Assisted Living place if neither one of us likes Bingo?"
"We'll play Backgammon."
"Oh, I love Backgammon," she said.  "I haven't played in years.  I miss it."
"Me too."

I was sitting at the end of the bench seat so it was easier for me to get up.  I asked her if she'd like some ice water or a soda.  "Do they have Diet Pepsi?" she asked.
"Nope,  Diet Coke."
"Oh, yuck.  I'm addicted to Diet Pepsi.  I hate Coke."
"Me too!"
"Put a lot of ice in it.  Maybe I can swill it down."

Then she told me that when her second husband died, it was hard.  I thought she meant loneliness, but she went on to say, "He had been married before and had four children.  They always acted like they liked me.  I was real good to their Father.  I let them make the decisions for his funeral.  He wanted to be cremated, but two of the kids lived away, so his oldest daughter wanted him embalmed, so they could see him.  He was cremated after wards.  That cost a lot more for the funeral."

By this time I was mesmerized, as this was the same as Fred and my funeral story.  I didn't say anything, just nodded my head.

"His oldest daughter and son said for me not to worry.  They would help pay for the funeral.  It never happened.  They didn't pay one single dollar."

I nodded.

"Then to top it all off, after the funeral, they came to the house and roamed around and took anything of his that they wanted.  They even went out in the shed and the boys took tools that belonged to MY son.  Then, what I really thought was odd, none of them wanted his ashes.  I paid to have him buried with his first wife!"

I nodded again and then said, "Well, let me tell you my story."

Her daughter was listening by now.

"My story is exactly the same as yours, except his oldest son took his bike from the shed--a bike I wanted to keep for myself.  And, since none of his kids wanted his ashes, I paid for a stone and buried him at the end of my own family cemetery plot."

She looked at me with her mouth open.

Her daughter said, "Mom.. it sounds like you and Judy have lived parallel lives!"
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I have never connected so quickly and completely with another woman, other than my BFF.  We both stated that it felt like we had known each other for years and years.  We sat holding hands.

When the gifts were being opened, Irene said, "I can't hear a thing they are saying and I am only ten feet away!"

"I can't either.  It's all that extraneous noise.  I guess I need a hearing aid."

"Me too."

Then I said, "I can hardly see what they are opening.  They are sitting right in front of the sun, shining in the window and it makes everything look blurry to me."

"Me too," she said.
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When we left, Karen said, "Mom, I didn't get to sit with you.  You looked like you were having fun.  Did you know that lady?"

"No.  Never met her in my life.  She's Morgan's grandma, Irene."

"You're kidding!  Every time I looked down that way, you were deep in conversation or hugging.  I thought you had probably met her before."
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Well, Irene and I can't wait for the wedding and we are figuring out how to sit together again--no matter where our place cards are, at the reception, we will just move them, because as she often said, "We are old.  We can do anything we want and we don't care what people think!"

She lives in Pittsburgh, but is planning on moving back this way to live with Morgan's parents.  They only live about three miles south-west of my sister, on a farm.  Irene and I are making plans to get together after she moves.
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After we left, we stopped in for a quick visit to my other grandson, Stephen.  He lives on the Michigan State campus so more walking from the parking lot, but I got to see his apartment and get a big hug.

We left here at 1:00, got home at 8:00.  My feet, back and hips didn't hurt a bit, but I fell asleep quickly, I was so tired.  This morning a few aches from so much walking, but oh...........so worth it.

What an awe-some day.  I still can't believe it!!