Everything's Coming Up Roses!

I forgot to tell you, Merle has had more, even more tests done and there is absolutely not one darn thing wrong with him---physically anyway.

Last summer/fall, he had blood tests, colonoscopy, tread mill test, wore a Holter heart monitor, had a ultra sound on his heart, Doppler on his carotid arteries, MRI's (plural that is)-from head down to his feet,  Nothing wrong with him.

So, he still doesn't feel well and sort of shuffles when he walks, and sleeps a lot.  So, three months ago he had even more extensive tests done.  CAT scan on his brain.  The most up-to-date cancer testing.  More blood work done, looking for Lyme Disease, West Nile Virus, Meningitis, you name it, they searched for it.  Two more MRI's from head to foot.  Urine collection.  Kidney tests.  Bladder tests.  Liver scan.  Gall Bladder ultra sound.  Scope to look at his Prostate gland.  Endoscopy into his lungs.  Sleep Apnea overnight study.  

There is not one thing wrong with him and all docs and specialists told him, he'll probably live into his nineties!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Does this make he and Pearl overjoyed?  Nope.

He still drags around and she's still mad because he isn't 50 anymore.

I suggested to Pearl that I think he should take an anti-depressant.  Just a mild one--Celexa--like I take.  Pearl's response was, "He isn't going insane!  He doesn't have mental illness!"

I tried to explain that Merle had a big shock last year when he came to realize that he was no longer capable of lifting heavy things, working as much as he always had, that mowing the lawn makes his legs tired and that his balance is off.  I said, "That was probably a hit to his manhood and it probably didn't help that you kept telling him, 'you just aren't the man I have always known. I didn't expect you to end up this way!' "

I quietly said to her, "Psychologically, that could put him in a very depressed mood.  His symptoms of sleeping a lot, not wanting to go anywhere anymore, not talking very much, that is typical of depression.  A lot of people have depression..especially when they get older."

*crickets

Guess I'm done with that too and now when she tells me how, "I just hate him anymore.  He won't talk to me, he doesn't want to do anything, he just sits in his chair like a lump! He is not the man he has always been, and I don't like him this way!"  

I just reply, "Oh?"

She didn't realize he was going to get old?
She still thinks he should act like he did when he was 20?
She won't let him quit work?

Looney Tunes!
================================
So--the Roses part? (up in the title)

Yesterday, I took a couple of hours to figure out my budget.  Not the budget of the last few years, but a newer one--a separate one, which includes the work I do for My Sweet Girl, Chris.

I have gone back to the way I once operated--budget-wise.  A certain amount of my "pay" will go into my checking account.  The rest will be divided into envelopes--for the rest of my car repairs in the spring.  For my glasses.  For the doctor bills still present in my life. For miscellaneous--because for the last three years, my Budget has had no Misc. money.  (Hair cut.  Eating out.  New shirt. Ink jet cartridges. Kids birthdays. Pizza delivery) Those things I need, but don't have room for in my normal Budget.

AND I know myself well enough that if, I put all my work related $$$ into my checking account, it would soon be spent on something stupid.  I do best working with envelopes for certain emergency type things I will need.  I never Rob Peter to Pay Paul that way. It's untouchable until I have enough to pay for what I need.

I figure, if I continue to work for Chrissy, until I am 85-87 years old--I just might get all my debts paid off!  HAH!

Anyway, you just can't imagine the weight that has been taken off my mind.  I'm no longer not as scared anymore.  
===================

ARGGH!!

I caught a ride into Brighton with Dar this morning and picked up my car.  This time, after she dropped me off, she didn't get lost getting back to work.  The Meijer store, where she works, is on the same street as the service garage, where my car was, but last time, she got lost going back!  It's all of four blocks!

She is more than just directionally challenged and on the ride in, I discovered why.  She keeps up a non-stop conversation.  She never looks at side streets, or buildings for reference points, she barely sees the traffic around her.  So, when she gets somewhere, she has no idea where she is, how she got there and certainly no idea how to get back.  Kind of scary!!

<"In which direction does the sun rise, Dar?"
"That way."
"and you are driving into the sun, right?"
"Yes, and it's bright."
"Okay, so if you are driving into the sun, are you heading east or west or......"
"I don't know!">
=================

Anyway, my car is home with two new Serpentine belts under her hood and ready to drive her engine!  So--after two months I have, new front brakes, pads and rotors.  A new radiator.  New belts and hoses.  My list of five major repairs, is down to two...AND, I have paid for next months rent on their establishment!!!!!
========================
I didn't tell you that Sunday I went up to Pearl's.  You know, she has been bugging me to set up an e-mail account for her, because.........she wants to order things on-line and they need her e-mail address to send the confirmation.  I haven't wanted to do it, but....................

I tried and tried.  After all, we both have Comcast and we have to have an e-mail account/address with them.  Every time I tried, I'd get an error message saying she already had one.  So I asked pertinent questions of her like, "when you started with Comcast, did they give you an e-mail address or did Marge (her daughter) set you up with one?"

"I don't know.  Maybe.  I wasn't in the room when they did all that computer stuff."

"Do you have a paper where she or you might have written it down.  That and your password?"

"No.  Not that I remember."

"Do you check your bank balance on-line?"

"Yes--all the time."

"Well, in order to do that, they would request your e-mail address and password."

"They would?  They never asked me for that."

"Who set up your account information, so you can log in to check the bank?"

"Marge, but she never told me I had an e-mail address or needed a password."
<ARGGH>

So I gave up on that.  Her computer was also running slow and she is without any anti-virus protection.

I did a disc clean, but nowadays, that doesn't do much for these newer machines.  I did not do a registry clean, because you can get into all kinds of trouble with those.  I have done it on my machine, but I wasn't going to do it on hers!
===================
Yesterday she called.

"I can't get into Face Book.  They want my user ID and password."

"Well, just type that information on those lines in that little box."

"I don't know what information they want."

"Your user identification or name and your password."

"I don't have any of that."

"When Marge set up your Face Book account, she put in your user name and  you chose the password 'tiger09', remember?"

"Oh, that password has been changed.  It's now 'tiger11" "

"Okay, put that in."

"It won't work.  Somebody messed up my computer.  You were the last one to work on it......"
<AHA!>

"I think we should take your computer over to the store, where we bought ours last year, and have Holly put Outlook express on, and the virus protection program she put on it when it was new and clean up your hard drive."

"Okay...when?"

"Wednesday, after I get my car back."
=============================
So today at 2:00, I picked up Pearl and her computer and off we went.

When we got to the store, I explained what was going on.  Holly said to Pearl, "Who is your service provider?"

"Huh?"

I answered, "Comcast."

Holly:  "Well, if you have Comcast you automatically have an e-mail address.  You don't need Outlook, you just go to the Comcast website and can read all your e-mails there."

"Huh?"

Holly:  "What is your e-mail address at Comcast?"

Pearl:  "I don't have one."

Judy: "The e-mail I last knew for Pearl was, pearleo7794@comcast.net"

Pearl: "Oh, that's been changed.  Marge set me up a g-mail account last month."

I spun my head around and looked at Pearl.  "Then you do have an e-mail account?"

Pearl:  "No!  You don't hear very well, I said, Marge set me up a G-MAIL account, not an E-MAIL account." She looked at Holly,  "I keep telling her, she needs a hearing aid!"

I turned back to Holly, "Just install Bitedefender, clean up her hard drive, get all those icons off her start-up bar and put a g-mail icon on her desk top, so she only needs to click it to get to her e-mails.  That should do it."

Holly turned to Pearl, "Is that what you want done?"

"I guess so."

I said, "As soon as we get your computer back and hooked up, from then on, Marge will have to be your computer go-to person.  She probably knows more about computers than I do and....it isn't wise to have too many people messing on your computer because....one of them won't know what the other has done and that only causes more problems."
============
We both bought the same computer July 2014.  Four times in the last year I have either heard. "I hate this thing that you made me buy."  or "What did you do to my computer, it won't work."  Or words along those lines.  So......................

Not my circus.  Not my monkeys.  AND, this time I mean it!!!!!
=================
Oh yeah, as long as I am on a Pearl rant...I gave Pearl some Purple Hyacinth Bean Plant seeds.  I planted mine and the plant has flourished.  Hers have not, so I heard, "Something is wrong with those seeds you gave me.  What did you do?  Keep all the good ones for yourself?" 

I noted that she had them planted in a shady spot and they need sun, but she informed me that they got some late afternoon sun, so I didn't know what I was talking about...........................

Because, after all, as she will constantly tell me, she worked in a florist shop arranging flowers for three months, so she knows everything there is about plants!

How in the world has she been able to function in her life for seventy-seven years?

Rainy, Gray, Chilly, Fun Day!

Is that even possible?  For someone to be almost 30 and be gay and not even know it?  Could he just be non-sexual?  Perhaps born with not enough testosterone?  He certainly doesn't act gay in the least. Interesting.  I will be so happy when sweet Susanna finds another nice man, who is a "real" man.
====================================

Look what I found this afternoon: "Asexual people, though lacking sexual attraction to any gender, might engage in purely romantic relationships, while others might not.^[9][18][19] There are asexual-identified individuals who report that they feel sexual attraction but not the inclination to act on it because they have no true desire or need to engage in sexual or non-sexual activity (cuddling, hand-holding, etc.), while other asexuals engage in cuddling or other non-sexual physical activity."

That's him!  I have seen them cuddling and kissing.  They do almost everything together--like best pals.  The way he proposed to her was so romantic that the whole family thought it amazingly wonderful.  He appears to be very romantic, thoughtful to her with sweet little surprises.  Such a mystery!

Wow--something like this could really tear up a woman's self esteem.
==================
Pammie and Evan arrived just as my Soap was coming on.  I quickly determined that Evan's visit was far more important.  I had bought him a whole bunch of stuff from the Dollar store and he loved every single thing!  Especially the paddle ball that lights up when you bounce it.

Evan does not like/will not pose for pictures.

I had a cupcake and I put a candle in it and we sang Happy Birthday to him.  He wasn't a bit shy about that.  Usually kids hate to have that sung to them.

He's scarily smart, as was his older brother, Andrew, who he is the spitting image of.  Curious and wants to know how every things works.  Lots of questions and lots of explanations.  Today, he was curious about my floor registers and wanted to know what they were. 

So I took the vent off one and let him look down inside, then explained how it was a long tube that came from the furnace to carry the warm air to all the rooms.  I sent him seeing how many he could find and he figured out, they all laid along one straight course.  Bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, living room and den.

Then I showed him the furnace and explained how it worked and turned on the fan, so the air would blow up from all the vents.

He came back in the living room, looked around and said, "There should be another vent there---under the couch."

Well, there is, but you can't see it and it is shut off.  What mystified me was why would he think that?  How did he deduce that?

Then Pam told me of an instance last week.  Evan's dad was trying to figure something out on the panel for the outdoor sprinkler system.  He had tried a couple of different switches and Evan said, "Dad...look..if you push that switch and hold it and then that switch, at the same time, I think it will work."

His Dad said, "Nah...I don't think........well...wait a minute..." he tried it and it worked.

This little boy just turned 4 yesterday.  Andrew was the same way and by the time he was 6, usually I had no idea what he was talking about, when he explained how computers worked.
==============

Scary!


Just before they left, I said, "Evan, come here.  I have something to tell you."

He came close, "What?'

"Every time, before you leave, you are supposed to give Mimi a hug.........." and he went to scamper away.  I caught him, leaned back in my big chair and hugged him and kissed on his cheek and nibbled at his ears.  Of course, he squirmed to get away, squealing, giggling and laughing, but I held on tight.
==============
This late afternoon, I drove my car to the service garage and John met me there after he got out of work and brought me home.  The Serpentine belts were there waiting for my car.  They thought they might have the job done before closing time, but I decided to come home, instead of waiting.  

After all, John was already there to pick me up and, just my luck, if I had stayed and waited for the job, something would have happened to make the job longer and I would have been stuck in Brighton.

Better safe than sorry. 

Weird--Full Moon, Monday.

All I have is a cheap, point and shoot digital camera, so taking pictures of the eclipse didn't turn out real well, but................

I stood outside watching and then my back got too hurting.

So, I opened the back doors on my car, and laid down in the back

seat, with my head near the open door, with legs sticking out the other door,

and just watched.  I almost fell asleep!!

It reminded me of the many times I used to lay out in my back

yard and just watch the stars and moon as they crawled across the sky.

==================================================

==================================================

Please, please....tell me I am not the only one grossed out by this new invention.
http://www.shethinx.com/pages/how-it-works

I dare say they aren't for menopausal women and the hemorrhages.  At that time, I needed Depends--two of them, one worn over the other!!!!!
===========================

 Well, look what I spotted at 8:30 this morning.  Pearl visiting Jackie.

Such cute, short, little chubby ladies. :-)

Pammie called me.  She and Evan will be coming over tomorrow around 1:30!!! YAY.

Then, I was just sitting in my chair, knitting and in walked Karen.  How wonderful that she feels comfortable enough to just stop by without having to call first.

I haven't seen her in 3 months.

I got caught up on all her kids--sadly, my second grand daughter Susanna, the runner who works for New Balance Shoes in Oregon, is divorcing.  She and her  husband have known each other since they were both on the college track team---about 8 years.  They married 3 years, but they just remained friends.  There never was any passion or that kind of feeling in their marriage.  In fact, I found out today, their marriage was never consummated!  They were both virgins when they married and still are!  Weird, isn't it?

So, thankfully no children to add problems to the divorce, no large house, nothing of any great value.  They just divided their own stuff, Susanna moved to another apartment and.....that's it. Her husband is such a nice guy--perhaps he should have been a priest?  Because to my way of thinking, what man could refuse this beautiful girl?

Maybe he's gay?

Very sad for Susanna, but she will recover and be just fine.

=======================

Karen and I yakked away as fast as we could for over an hour.  Then she wanted to know about my car.  i told her all I needed was the two Serpentine belts and it should be good to go for the winter.

"Mom!  You can't be driving around with frayed belts!  We had that happen and we were stranded.  If one of those belts go...your car is dead--you can't go anywhere!"

"Yes, I know.  I am going to get them done the first of the month."

"How much will it cost?"

"I....one hundred fifty dollars."

...and she whipped out her check book and said, "I want to pay for the belts...or your glasses.  Which one?"

"No...now----"

"I wanted to pay your dental bill last spring and you wouldn't let me.  Now don't argue!  Which one?"

"The belts.  I can still see pretty good, but I need the belts before winter."

==============

When she left, I called and made an appointment to take my car in Wednesday morning.

What a dear, dear child!!!

Plus I found out, her youngest daughter, Madeleine the ballet dancer/Guatemalan house builder, is taking RN classes in college AND working in elder care!!!

So nice to know that I have someone to take care of me.  LOL

<like I'm going to let my grand child change my Depends.  I think not!>

Plus--under advice from her Gramma Judy, Maddie has realized that her "summer love" in Guatemala will never come to anything more than that and she broke it off.  YAY!!

I think it was the story I told her about my summer love, Richard Spencer Dunham.  Or the one her Aunt Jennifer had when she spent a summer in Spain. 

"These summer loves are wonderful, but they rarely ever go on to anything more.  The distance is too far to work.  But, you'll have great memories, when your Gramma's age."

(and she still has her Purity ring ensconced on her ring finger, so....................................nothing important lost.)

Paranoia

I have NEVER been paranoid in my entire life--but since the last 2 years and having my words misinterpreted, and the fact that Jen's husband is waiting to strike if I goof up again--I get scared.  Especially when I am in their home, which isn't very often and not for very long at a time.

Pam called me this morning.  She only just now found my voice mail on her phone.  She thought the way we left it Wednesday was....if they had the showing she would call and let me know when she and Evan were coming over.  Since the people cancelled the showing, and she and Little Guy weren't coming over, she didn't call.

WHEW!!!  Off the hook!  Of course, all day Thursday and Friday, I racked my brain, trying to remember every word I had said to the kids.  I laid in bed both those nights, not being able to sleep and praying to God to "fix it". 

These kids are not at all like Karen's kids.  They are very sensitive and take things quite personally.  (They are going to have a hard time in life, aren't they?)  So, I never know what I might say jokingly could be heard and repeated to Mom or Dad in a different context.

So--Pammie is bringing Evan over either Monday on his birthday or Tuesday.  It matters naught to me which day.
<this evening I was sitting out on the porch thinking and it occurred to me, if that family moves to New Jersey, I won't see them very often and...I just might rest a whole lot easier.  Not nice to say, but at least I wouldn't have to worry about every word that comes out of my mouth!>
========================
A nice thing this morning, around 10:00..in drove my sister and BIL and he had his chain saw and cut down the almost dead Rose of Sharon bush in my back yard, took 4 small Maple trees out which were growing up through my Lilac bushes and taller than the buses AND, cleaned out the gutter on the long side of my porch, where I had mini Maple trees growing and a 3 feet high corn plant with a baby ear of corn on it, plus four years of packed in dead, soggy leaves, as my porch is right under the giant Maple tree.

The bush to the right of my shed

Bush is down, now to tie it up in 4 feet length bundles for the yard waste people.

 

These kids work well together. 

Maple tree piles

My roof top garden!

Chuckie doesn't like heights so Susan is steadying the ladder for him. 

My corn plant.  Chuck wanted to know if I were going to boil it for his lunch!

I am so blessed to have these two living close.  These are chores that children or grand children should do, but....................................probably they would if I ever asked them?  Anyway--Susan, Chuck and I have a great time together.  Lots of laughing goes on.

Na Da

I have heard nothing from Pammie.  I know she was busy mowing her lawn today and probably tomorrow, so I will call her on Sunday afternoon to see about Monday.

I cut my perennials back this afternoon.  I found out something today---I can now bend over---way over to cut off the flowers.  Last fall I couldn't do that.  So, finally 3 years out from my last hip surgery and I am now flexible enough to bend over and way down. :-)

Of course tonight, my back and calves are a bit sore, but I am so happy.  When I had surgery, the ortho doc told me "nine months" before I'd be completely pain free.  The PT people told me, more like 18 months.  Others who had had hip surgery said, "more like two to three years."  The hip patients are right.  It has only been this summer that I can walk farther than ever and climb easier and now...bend over easier.  I have my flexibility back...and my balance.

There are an awfully lot of nerves that are cut in hip surgery, muscle, tendons.  It takes quite a long time for all those things to reconnect.  It is a very large area (inside) that is cut, removed and readjusted.  So, my scars have been gone for a year, but now...perhaps everything inside has settled down?

I Just Don't Know.....

I had a wonderful day yesterday afternoon.

Pammie called and told me I could come over to Jen's to see Evan's fish--as his mother had told him when I was there. visiting with Chris, the first of the month.

Evan will be 4 on Monday.  Yesterday was Jen and Eric's 15 wedding anniversary so they were away on a whole day trip of some kind.

I got my hair cut and stopped at Dollar General to pick up some toys Pam had suggested I get for Evan's birthday.  I have never been in a Dollar store.  I figured it was all a lie--that some stuff would be a dollar, but the rest wouldn't.

Well in this store, everything was a dollar!!!!!!!  I got him 5 toys and a Diet Pepsi = $6.00!  Amazing.

Then I drove on over to Jen's and parked at the end of their street so I could pick up Elise and Alex when they got off the school bus.  They have to walk a couple of blocks.

They seemed glad to see me and on the way uo to their house, we chatted about school and their new back packs and all good things.

When I walked into the house, Evan squealed and ran to Pammie.  I heard the oldest Andrew yell, "Dad?"

Pammie said, "No, it's gramma Judy."

Andrew came bounding up the stairs from his bedroom in the basement and gave me big hug.  You could have knocked me over with a feather.  This is not like Karen's family.  This is not a huggy family and I don't think Andrew has hugged me since he was eight years old.

Nearly 14, he is almost as tall as I am, has his hair cut a bit long and it is curly.  He looks the spitting image of his grandpa, my ex did at that age.  I almost swooned!

I asked him if he liked High School and if he was still taking Karate and playing Lacrosse.

"Yes, I'm still in Lacrosse.  No I gave up Karate for Lacrosse, but now, I am on the schools boxing team."

"What?  You are going to ruin your handsome face!"

He just giggled.

"Are you taking any advanced classes this year?"

"Yep.  Calculus, Trigonometry and Chemistry."
<yikes>

I walked into the kitchen and talked a bit with Pammie and Elise and Alex and then Evan finally came up and said, "Mimi Gramma Judy, come upstairs and you can see my fish."

So up the 19 steps we scampered.  Well, he scampered and I struggled.

He was waiting for me at the top.

"Now, show me which room is yours," I said, even though I knew.

So he gave me the tour of Alex room and then Elise and then his--which was used as the nursery for all the kids.

"Wow!  How many fish do you have?"

"I has free...I mean thu-er-eee."

"What kind of fish are they?"

"They aren't special--no.  They don't need special water.  We got them at the fair.  We had eight, but most of them died."

"What is that motor for.  The one with the tube on it?"

"Oh...that is to pump air bubbles into the water.  Fish need air...ah...ox-ee-jin, so they can breve."

He went running across the "bridge" that is open to the entry way below, and threw a toy into his parents bedroom.

Pammie must have heard his foot steps from down below because she came and looked up at us and said, "Evan, get out of your parents bedroom.  You know you aren't supposed to go in there.  Aunt Pammie isn't even allowed to go in there."

There I stood, in the doorway of this forbidden room, not wanting to step inside, but trying to find where he had thrown his toy.  They were having a "showing" today so I knew, we had to keep things picked up and clean.

"Can you go in there and get your toy.  It's under the bed and Gramma can't get down there to get it."

He ran and went sliding in on the wood floor.  Then he slid and wiggled under the bed.

Pam yelled again and I explained, "He is just getting his toy out from under the bed.  We'll be right down."

As soon as he came out, "Good job,"I said and then closed the door.

He slide down the stairs on his bottom and I limped down.

Pretty soon it was time for Pam to take Alex to Soccer practice, so I made my goodbyes.

I limped down the 15 steps to the basement, knocked on Andrew's open door and told him I was leaving.  He showed me his new computer.

"Wow, that is a beauty," I said.

"I built it myself," he said.

"Is it one of those super CAD ones--with all the power?"

He looked at me like I knew what I was talking about.

"Yeah.  It's got .........................bandwidth and...................mega hertz and...................."

I was completely lost.  

"Well, I gotta get going."

"Okay Gramma."

and I got another hug.

I floated back up those 15 steps.

As I was leaving, Pam said, "Evan and I might come over tomorrow during the showing.  Are you going to be home?"

"Yup.  Come on over."

"Okay.  If not tomorrow, for sure on his birthday Monday or Tuesday.  They have a showing both of those days. I'll call and let you know."

"Great!  I can't wait!"
==========================
I got up early this morning and got the house cleaned up and vacuumed.  Found the box of toys Evan's siblings used to play with when I took care of them--which, at one time, was often.

I didn't know what time the showing was, but I was eager and waiting and...................anticipating--with expectations.

How many times have I told others with tenuous family relationships not to anticipate or expect a thing?

At 3:00 I called Pam and left a message on her voice mail.

She has not answered back and it's 9:00.

Now, I worry and wonder, what did I do wrong?
Did I say something wrong and the kids innocently told their parents what Gramma Judy said?
Did Evan tell his parents that I was in their bedroom?
Do they have nanny cams or security cameras that show me standing in their bedroom doorway?

I have been racking my brain all afternoon and I cannot come up with a thing except...I offered to help Elise pick up her room for "the showing tomorrow" and she said, "we aren't having one tomorrow."  Perhaps her parents hadn't told her and I let it out?

Now--I'm worried that Pam won't be able to bring Evan over first of next week and I will be back at square one of 3 years ago.  

The evil, bad, Gramma.

I almost hate going over to their house.  There are "egg shells" covering every floor and it makes me nervous trying not to step on them!!!
=========
Well at least, I got to see all of them yesterday and that was a good thing.