title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Thursday, June 12, 2014

The E-Mail

Received this e-mail late last night from Jen.



Hi there,

Thank you for your card.

 I do not hold any grudges against you. However, it is not going to be easy for any of us to trust you again.

Sorry, but Eric doesn't want to be at Madeleine's open house with you. Do you know what times you plan on being there? I figured you'd probably go early, and you usually don't stay too long, so we'd go after. Does that work for you? 

I hope you are well, J=
==============================


Pammie told me that Eric didn't have a problem with me--however--I guess little Miss Passive-Agressive still does?

I waited all day and just replied:  "I will leave at 7:15."

You know why?  Because I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable with both of us there--even though we could be on opposite sides of the lawn/house and never see each other, AND--I don't want to make it any more difficult for Maddie to see her Aunt/Uncle/Cousins and for all of them to be able to see her.

Onward and Upward--Ever Forward!!


Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Fun Times?

Today's high temperature was:  71
Humidity:  62
Off and on showers and heavy rains in the afternoon and evening
===================================
Woke up early to a soft rain, that stopped by 9:00 and the sun came out.  I was going up to The Farm to visit my sister and see her new gardens, but knew heavy rain storms were expected in the afternoon, so decided to stay home and clean up the house.

At 11:00, I got a bright (?) idea.  We know that Pearl wants two Delphinium plants.  We also know Merle doesn't want her to buy anymore plants.  After I weeded her garden and took out some Iris, she had a nice big empty spot for---Ta Dah--Delphiniums!!

I called and asked if she wanted to go across the road to the garden center--where she had seen the plants she wanted--get them, put them in the ground, before the rain and before Merle got home, BECAUSE, we all know, a man is not going to notice--they are so tunnel visioned.

I dropped her off at the door.  She knew right where the plants were and off she trundled.  I parked the car and was in the store before she was.  I went up to the desk and asked where the Delphinium's were.  The girl showed me.  Before I could call out to Pearl, she was half-way across the store and WITH NO CART!!!  She needs a cart to lean on or she can't walk very far.

I scooted out to patio and grabbed a cart.  One of the employees also grabbed a cart and took off ahead of me.

Of course, you guessed it--SHE was giving her cart to Pearl and I came up and said, "I got you a cart!"  We all laughed and then I had a cart to lean on too.  Win-Win.

"I can't find those Delphiniums," she said. "I know they were right in this aisle!"

"I asked the girls at the check-out.  All the Delphiniums have been brought in and they are at the front."

So off we walked.  Well, I walked and Pearl limped and moaned.

Four Hundred and Eleven Thousand Delphinium plants--and--

"This isn't the kind I want.  The one I want is Sapphire blue and isn't all bunched up like these."

Now--when I think Delphinium's, I think:
Tall, spikes

"These?" I asked.

"No.  I don't like that bunch."

"Bunch?"

"That bunch of flowers all on top of the stem."

"You are going to plant them in the back of the garden.  You need a tall something or your Peony plants, in front will cover it up."

"Let's go look outside in the nursery section."

"There aren't any Delphinium outside.  They have brought them all inside to mark them down and sell them."

An employee came by, Pearl said, "Do you have Delphinium outside? "

"No.  We have brought them all in.  These are all the Delphinium we have."

"I want to go out anyway."

So we did--it was sprinkling.  I am stretching and craning my neck, trying to see Sapphire colored plants, so I could walk right to them and Pearl wouldn't have to walk so much.

Pearl said, "I'm sure it was this store.  I don't think it was Lowe's where I saw it."
<I must admit, my shoulder's did slump a bit>

"The name started with an "L".  L something, Delphinium."

"Oh," I shouted with glee.  You want a Larkspur!!"




"Yes!  I think that's it!  I know it has an "L" at the beginning of its name!"

Back inside we went and Pearl asked the check-out girl where the Larkspur were.

"They are all there with the Delphinium.  Larkspur's are a form of Delphinium."

"Well, I KNOW that," harrumphed Pearl.

So we looked some more.  They only had a pinkish color.  DRAT!

"Well--let's go," says Pearl.

"Okay.  I will go get the car and drive up.  You wait at the door until you see me, Okay?"

"Yup."

I walked out to my car, in the rain, and drove up to the entrance.  I waited....and waited...and then I waited some more.  I was going to go back into the store--wondering if Pearl was all right, but I was in a NO PARKING zone.  Just then--here she comes with two Sapphire blue plants.  Smallish, short, bushy Delphiniums.  I put them in the back seat and we came home.

"Let's plant these so they can get a good soaking from the rain that's coming."

"Okay."

I walked into their shed. which has a five foot, eight inch height and slammed my forehead into the entryway.  I backed out a bit, shook the "stars" out of my head, scrunched over to get inside and found the shovel and back out to her front garden.  I dug a hole by the back edge, then picked up the Delphinium pot and looked at the tag.  Their full height?  12 inches.  Spread? 18 inches

"I don't think these are going to work back there, Pearl.  They only grow to a foot high.  You won't be able to see them behind the Rudbeckia plants.  Do you want to take them back and we will go to the other garden place and look for a Dark blue Larkspur?"

"It's called REBECCA, or Brown-eyed Susan!"
<or is it BLACK-eyed Susan?   I'm not fighting that fight again>

"Okay.  Do you want to take the Delphinium's back?"

"Nope.  These will be okay.  They were twenty percent off.  They probably wouldn't take them back."
<a deep sigh tried to erupt from me, but I quelled it>

"Okay then.  Can I move the Obedience and REBECCA plants back near the house and put these plants in front.  I think they are like plants for a border."

"Sure."

So, I raked away the big chunky, stupid bright red bark mulch they put on the garden and dug a hole for the other plants--dug them out, trying to keep a lot of soil with them, put them in the holes and then planted one of the Delphinium in the hole where they had been.  

Raked all the mulch back into place...by now it was raining.

"I will come back Monday and plant the other one, okay?  You set the pot where you want me to plant it.  It will be all right to leave it in the pot for the next few days."

I just hate that she got a plant she didn't really want.  I understand why she did.  I was in her shoes four years ago.  It is so painful and tiring to walk all over a huge garden center (or store for that matter) trying to find just what you want.  You start out with energy and hope and, within fifteen minutes, you hurt so bad you just want the whole shopping trip over and done with.  Thus, you "settle".

That is why I tried to do most of the running around for her this morning.  Telling her where all the Delphiniums were. Getting her a cart.  She just trundles on, not listening to or taking any one's advice.  Then she gets so worn out and in such pain and then....grouchy.

So, now she has Sapphire border plants.  They will look beautiful in her garden, BUT she didn't get the tall spike of Sapphire Larkspur that was what she really wanted.

I am going to go out tomorrow and see if I can find her one.  Then, I will take it down Monday.  If she doesn't want the damn thing, I will plant it in one of my gardens!!!  That will probably make her mad that I took it upon myself.  

Hm-mm.  Maybe it is better if I just go out looking tomorrow and then, if I spot one, Monday I can kind of steer her to the garden center that has it and to where they are displayed.  

Yup.  That might be better.

Onward and Upward!!
=========================
I almost forget--I did a bad thing last night.  Tami (of the neighbor that doesn't know enough to water a new tree), has put those large solar lights all over her side lawn.  Four of them are quite near my bedroom.  I like to sleep with my bedroom blinds up a bit and the window open.  When I lay on my left side, two of those lights shine right in my eyes.  She has them in a raised bed of Bee Balm.

She and her husband worked nights--leaving at 5:00 and returning at 2:00 in the morning. So---last night, after they left, and it got dark enough for the lights to come on, I sneaked over and took the two offending lights out of where she had put them.  I moved them in front of the Bee Balm plants--which are large enough now to shield my eyes from the lights!  

AHA!!!!!

I am quite sure, she will never notice.



Monday, June 9, 2014

Just Another Day On Lakeview Lane

Today's temperature: 59 degrees at 8:00 a.m.--75 degrees at 8: p.m.
Sunny
============================
Woke up with a real sore foot--checked it out and it had a long scratch on it.  I must have moved my feet during the night and Maggie took offense and nailed me with a claw.  This has happened before.

Got up and pulled on my jeans and long sleeved shirt.  Don the Lawnmowing Man was here and I went out and told him how I wanted him to,"Take your trimmer and please, massacre that Myrtle vine creeping out onto the lawn!"  Which he did.

I should have gone to the grocery store, but instead, around 10:30, I pulled on a T-shirt and shorts and walked up to Pearl's to finish off weeding her garden.  She had decided that instead of just getting the remaining grass out of her garden, she wanted me to dig up 5 trillion Iris, 6 million Obedience plants and a Partridge in a Pear Tree!  

She can work about 5 minutes and I can work about 15 before we have to quit.  She usually sits in a lawn chair and watches and chats while I dig.  She has wooden bark on her garden and I have to rake it away so I can get the dang shovel down into the dirt!  She stood up and went to bend over to pull out some of the Iris I had loosened, and she fell face first in the garden.  

"Stay right there and I will get your chair to help you up."

But she rolled over onto her back and there I was---trying to help a turtle get turned over--a very large turtle or a "beached whale" as she said.  I finally got her to roll over and brought the chair up close.  Then, I sat on the chair to add weight, took both of her hands and we both huffed and puffed and finally got her on her knees where she could pull herself up, by holding onto the arms of the chair, while I sort of pulled on her upper arms and shorts to hoist up her butt.

"Next time you do that, I'm calling Corrigan's towing and have them bring a winch to haul you up??"

I knew she wasn't hurt or I wouldn't have said that and she was laughing and so was I, but a bit worried as she was very dizzy.  She still suffers from bouts of Vertigo from her fall in the driveway when she hit the back of her head.

We decided it was time to quit.  She wanted the extra space so she can plant 2 Delphiniums!  After Merle told her not to buy anymore plants and she promised she wouldn't--but--she wants Delphiniums so we are going to get Delphiniums!!!  Merle won't even notice there is a new plant there.

I can't hardly take care of my own small gardens and now I think, I will have an extra chore next spring, weeding time.  It's okay--if I can, I will.  We both wonder why our kids don't offer to help us, but.....well, you all know how that goes.
===========================
I came home and did two loads of laundry and cleaned the bedroom, than watched my Soap.  

I kept thinking I should get up and go shopping for food, but kept finding things that needed doing...now!  Like moving the bird bath to a new location.  Filling the feeders.  Watering all the annuals.  Sweeping off the porch.

I got done, came in to rest and Dar was at the door.  She was carrying some brocade fabric over her arm.  It was beautiful--heavy with silver threads.  Then she opened it up and it was a Caftan!

The dang thing was huge--wide and long.  White, with silver braid and buttons all down the front and sleeves.

"My Daddy had this made for my Mother in 1962.  Custom made in Spain.  It cost a thousand dollars.  I don't know what to do with it."

"It would make beautiful drapes," I said.

"WHAT?!"

"What do you want to do with it?"

"I want to have it altered--an empire waist.  I want to wear it to my nephew's wedding so my Daddy can see it again."

"Don't you think it might be a bit too formal?"

"Probably, but I don't care."

"Don't you think it might upset your Daddy to see your Mother's special dress on you?
"Oh.  I never thought of that.  It might.  Hm-mm."

She pulled the Caftan over her head.  There were two ribbons, inside, at the waist line to tie and snug up the waist a bit.  

She looked kind of like Cleopatra--or an Arab queen--or...I don't know.  I don't know why I didn't grab my camera!  Missed chance, dag nab it!






"Oh my gosh!  It's heavy!" she exclaimed, as she wrestled it off up over her head.  The waist ties got caught under her armpits and I helped free her.
================================
She left and I was sitting in my recliner with my feet up--my right foot is swollen.  I jumped when neighbor, Tami, started talking to me through the open window behind me.

"I'm going to have to dig up that @#@*& red bud tree and take it back to Home Depot.  The F#@@*&G thing is dying."

"Have you watered it?"

"I watered it when I planted it."

"You planted it when?  Memorial Day?"

"Yeah.  Why?"

"It is a living thing, Tami.  It needs water.  Just like you do."

"We had rain yesterday."

"We had sprinkles.  Put your hose on an easy trickle and flood the area where you planted it."

I got up and walked out.  She bought the tree for "us".  She planted the tree on "our" property line.  "Now you will be able to see it too," she said.

I couldn't see it unless I opened up my bedroom window and climbed out onto my hedges!!

"I gotta go to the F#@@*&G dentist!"

"How long will you be gone?"

"About an hour."

"That's perfect.  Let the hose run on a slow trickle and give it a good watering---way down to its roots."

"Won't that be too much?"

"Nope.  We don't have to pay for water, so drench the tree really good every week."

I told Pearl and she said, "Tami planted a Sweet Pea tree on my lot line last spring.  She never watered it.  I felt sorry for it, so I watered it in June.  Then, I figured it wasn't my responsibility and I stopped.  The thing was dead by August.  Dumber than a box of rocks!"
<and she talks filthy even though Pearl, Dar, Jackie and I have told her we don't like her cussing>

Maybe tomorrow things will be calmer and I can get to the store?




Sunday, June 8, 2014

Simply Sunday and Feeling Vital

The high temperature today was: 78 degrees
Sunny and lovely
===============================

I woke up to rain.  It was supposed to rain all day.  I checked the Internet weather map for this area and saw that the rain would leave around 11-11:30.

Maddie's BFF was having her graduation party today and she posted on Face Book that she was worried about the rain.  I messaged her back..."I promise you--the rain will stop--the sun will come--the day will be gorgeous--the party will be a success."

I left at 1:00 to drive the 2.8 miles to her house.  Absolutely gorgeous setting.  Down a wooded lane, the only house ON the drive AND, they had the wooded lane paved a few years ago.



It appears that every friend of Maddie's, comes from a wealthy family.  Of course, the area is filled with residents who are doctor's, lawyer's company owners, or professors who teach at the University of Michigan.  Apparently they can afford to give their children private music lessons, ballet lessons, orthodontists, dermatologists--whatever they may need.  The really delightful thing about all these kids--they are so down to earth and not pretentious at all.  I found that out yesterday at Matt's party, when I met Casey.  He has been in special school most of his life and you can quickly tell, when talking to him, that he has some sort of disability.  His mother usually goes with him to all functions.  Matt was his room-mate when the band went to Disney World, to take care of him.  Yet--all these kids, every single one of them, treat Casey like he is just like them.  They don't talk down to him, they don't act like he is any different.  I love these kids.

This was a write-up about this Senior Class in the county-wide newspaper this morning:
Brighton Area Schools administrators said the Class of 2014 helped establish a new culture of giving and leadership at BrightonHigh School.
Just under 500 seniors participated in the graduation ceremony Saturday, which was organized by the students.
Principal Gavin Johnson said these students were freshmen when he and Henry Vecchioni took over as principals at the school as part of a staff reorganization. They encouraged the students to become more involved, and that’s exactly what they did.
“We’ve encouraged these kids to take over leadership of their school,” Johnson said. “They have created dozens of events, clubs and activities that are good for Brighton High School and the city of Brighton and the Brighton community.”
He said new events included Pink Week, Wounded Warriors Week, Safety Week and National Honor Society Survivor Week.
“We’ve really built a student-centered culture, and these students have really ran with it,” Johnson said.
He said more high school students are taking Advanced Placement courses, and the high school has won a state championship every single year.
Superintendent Greg Gray said these students have helped reorganize the high school along with staff.
“It’s a great place for kids,” he said.
Gray said students are taking more advanced classes, and there are more charity events.
He said these students “have helped to redefine the culture at Brighton High School.”
=========================================
When I walked up to the back of the house, Susanna saw me and came running to give me a hug.  Her Mother took a picture of us.


I just found today that Susanna is Chinese.  I thought she was Korean.  They adopted her when she was almost 3.  

 I took a stroll along the boardwalk to the lake
 Coming back I could see their seating area, so lovely
 Susanna's "board" up on the porch

 A close-up of her and Morgan and Maddie


I thought this was a cute little table area, with tiny lights, off
to the side...

and it seemed like the perfect for the little ballerina's to sit
These are Maddie's ballet and home schooled friends.  When I walked up to the table to ask if I could take their picture, they all said, "Hi, Gramma Judy!"  Strange because I don't know any of them! When I usually see them at performances, they have their stage make-up on and look about 25.  Without that, they look like little girls!  I get confused!

I got some food--up and down the treacherous stepping stones and steps, and came back down to where the tables were.  All of a sudden people came and sat down and we got to talking.  Home school parents.  Missionaries from India.  The ballet teacher and her husband.  Of course, they all knew Maddie AND they all knew Karen.  So many times today I heard, "Karen is your daughter?"  "She tutored my kids in Algebra."  or "She came to the house and brought us supper for a week when we had our tenth baby."  of "She and Mark volunteered at every Nutcracker performance."

Then I got up to move around a bit and that little girl, in that picture above, sitting on the right with the colored skirt, came up, put her arm around my waist, leaned her head on my upper arm and said, "Gramma Judy."

"Yes.  I don't remember your name, Honey."

"I'm Morgan."

"How do you know me?"

"Everybody knows Maddie's Gramma Judy!"

So for half an hour, she stood like that and we talked and others came up and we talked some more.  She is such a delicate, little young woman and yet--she is in 4-H, raises hogs and shows the huge boars at the fairs and at Michigan State.  The boar is bigger than she is?

Then my Maddie showed up with flowers in her hair (she looks like a 1960's hippie girl) and ran to me before she even said Hi to her ballet friends to give me a hug.

Then Karen and Mark arrived.  They had chaperoned the all night Senior Party last night--they were on the Segue way station.  Showing the kids how to ride them and then watching as the kids played.  Karen said they got home at 3:00, but had a ball!  This party is quite the big deal, I guess.  There are different activity stations with different games and that sort of thing for the kids to do.  Magicians come in.  Hypnotists--Maddie said he suggested they were all floating on ice bergs and she said everyone was shivering from the cold.  HAH.

So--I had been there for almost 3 hours and decided to head home while I could still walk.

I went in to say good-bye to Susanna's parent's--Woody and Ingrid and informed that as soon as they had a spare bedroom, I would be moving in.  They thought it was a great idea.  Then I informed Woody, "The only thing is, Woodrow--I will need railings put in along the steps, the stepping stones and and the rocky descent so I don't fall."  He agreed.

Then Susanna came up to hug me good-bye.  As we were standing there, she said quietly, "I don't have a grandmother.  Ever since I first met you, I have always felt like you are my "kind of "grandma. You always come to my ballet performances...and you always remember my birthday and give me Christmas presents.  You ARE my Grandmother.  I love you, Gramma Judy."

I held her close and whispered, "I love you too, Sweetheart."

and I had to walk away because I was just about to lose it!!!
=========================================

It is hard for me to describe how I have felt about these kids I have met in the last 5 years--Maddie's friends.

When Karen was in high school, we had a lot of kids out to the farm all the time--especially that last Senior year.  I had no idea, when I woke up Sunday morning, how many kids might be sleeping on the living room floor--how many I'd have for breakfast.  Those kids called me "Momma Miller"--they came to me with their problems.  I hauled them around in my 9 passenger station wagon--to volleyball games, or track meets, or baseball games.  Chaperoned their dances--I was very close to her friends.  They thought I was "cool".

I haven't felt that needed for many years--except these last four with Maddie's friends--especially the last two years.  These kids will come up to me and want to talk.  They aren't just being polite and nice (although they all are), they actually like me and will go out of their way to talk, hug, laugh--whatever.

I once again feel useful, needed, vital--all because I am giving something to the kids.  I praise their performances.  I hear a trumpet solo at a band concert, look in the program to see what the kids name is and then ask Maddie to point him out to me and go over, introduce myself and tell him how wonderful his solo was.  They tell me they see my Face Book comments on their friends pages--when I praise the ballet company or the band and how much that means to them.

I was there at their pre-prom picture taking session, and although I only knew about 4 kids, the rest of them now know me and come up and talk.  They all call me Gramma Judy--even the boys.

I haven't felt this alive in a very long time.

Now--if I could just remember all their names, LOL!!

Saturday, June 7, 2014

A Beautiful Saturday

Saturday--the weather was sunny and 78 degrees
===============================

I was just sitting here, finishing up Maddie's "Gramma & Me" album when I realized that I had never completed one for Stephen, who graduated two years ago and will be starting his Junior year in college in the Medical School!!  EGADS!!!

I tried to remember back and then realized, that was the year Fred died.  So I sat and thought and to tell you the truth, I remember very little of that entire year!  I have photos to prove I went to Stephen's Eagle Scout ceremony and his graduation open house, but other than that......I have no clue what I did on my birthday or anything.  AND, much to my dismay, if I had any other photos of those events, I did not print them out and put them in my scrapbook, I put them in my Blog and guess what?  I deleted that blog in May of 2013 and all those photos are lost!

I had kept the kids Gramma and Me albums caught up--on computer file, but I see that I stopped in 2009 and a lot has happened since then!

So now, I am scrambling to get Stephen's pictures organized and printed and put in his album--albeit a bit late!

I knew I was weird the whole year of 2012--but I didn't realize my memory was so compromised!!
=============================
This morning was the kids graduation.  I sure wanted to go, but was told, I would have to walk much farther than I can, so......then photos started appearing on Face Book.


 There Matt is, up on the big screen, giving his speech
as President of the Class.

He mentioned that this was a class of firsts,
then to continue in that mode, he turned around and
took a selfie of himself--another first

and here's my precious girl

and my other two "adopted" grandkids, Drew and Brian 
Matt's open house was at 3:00, so I meandered over.  His father has a nice home on a lake, a lovely setting.



Matt saw me and came running up.  "Grammy!"  Then he took me by the hand and out to the canopy we went.  "I want you to meet someone."  He led me up to an older (my age) couple sitting at one of the tables.  The lady looked up and said, "And who is this?"

I said, "I'm Matt's Grammy."

She replied, "No you aren't.  I am!"

So I sat down with her and her husband and we had a grand time!  We had so much in common, including, they didn't go to graduation either.  Their son told them it would be too far for them to walk and too uncomfortable to sit for such a long time.  So, we griped about how our kids think we're too old to do anything anymore--and we might be, but...............
I had a wonderful afternoon with them.

I got to meet Matt's aunts and uncles.  Enjoyed a real nice talk with his Aunt.  She is an author also and we talked about where to get our books published and sold and how to market them.  She loves the marketing part--I like the writing part, LOL.  She is very knowledgeable.  She is probably 25-30 years younger than I am, so she has the energy and gumption to do it all.  I'm too tired anymore. :-)

I had wrapped up and given Matt a copy of my Hidden Treasure book--about the little boy named Matt.  I hope when he gets around to unwrapping it, he will like it.  I also told him that Matthew is my favorite boy's name and that Mrs. Rivard (Karen) was suppose to be a Matthew.

I also got to meet his twin Audrey, that I have never met in all the five years I've known him.  She is drop dead gorgeous.  They are Fraternal twins so if you put them side-by-side, you'd never know.  She looks like their Mom and Matt like his Dad.  I also got to meet their older brother--looks like Matt, only with dark brown hair, like their Mom.  He's a handsome young man for sure!!


Impressive!  I don't know how just one person could
accomplish so much in just 4 years.

John Phillip Sousa Award 


The the kids started rolling in and the love was poured out.  Each one of them came up to me and sat down and talked.  Some I had never met before, but for some reason, they knew Gramma Judy.  Thrill of my life.  When I got home, I had 3 Friend's Requests from them on Face Book. :-)



Then Maddie arrived and told me how strange it feels to know she is never going back to that school.  How she won't be seeing all her friends everyday.  Kind of sad, to be sure.  I remember feeling the same way.

To think, there I was with my favorite kids and my camera and never thought to get my picture taken with them.  I will have to remember and get a group shot at Maddie's open house--the same kids will be there.

I was so tired, I decided I better start home before I got too tired to drive.  I went in the house to find Matt's father because I wanted to tell him something.  I said, "I have worked with young people over the years--mostly boys and I just want to tell you that Matt is an exceptional young man.  I have never met a kid that is more gracious, thoughtful, giving, polite and talented as Matthew."  I think parent's need to hear that sort of thing--especially when it is true.

I am exhausted tonight.  Tomorrow it is suppose to rain--I hope not because I am going to this little, beautiful young lady's open house!   Who also calls me Gramma.  Maddie's ballet pal and BFF, Susanna