BREAKING NEWS!

Item #1:  The influenza virus has mutated!  Our influenza vaccines we do dutifully received last fall are not as effective as we hoped.   This is how civilization will be wiped out.  Not my nuclear war, nor earthquake, flood or famine, but by a microscopic, mutated bug that there is no vaccine for.  We will go out, not with a bang, but with a whimper while we lay in our own vomit and diarrhea covered beds!  Stiff with pain, and coughing our lungs out.

Item #2:  There are no greeting sized envelopes in this county!  I always make my own birthday cards to send to friends because...have you seen the price for one birthday card sold in stores??!!  I was out of greeting card size envelopes.  No big deal you say?  HAH--that's what you think!  Last week on my venture to Wal-Mart, I went to the mailing section and they had no envelopes that size--I usually get them there.  I had to go across the road to the Meijer store, so I checked there--NaDa!  

I have finished making my Christmas cards, so, today I decided to make a quick trip up to the Staples store in Brighton.  They have hundreds of boxes of envelopes--none for greeting cards however.  So, I drove over to the Target store and walked to their mailing supply section.  Again, hundreds of boxes of business envelopes, thank you note card envelopes, medium envelopes, no greeting card envelopes.

Considering the fact that I was now on a quest, I drove on over to the Meijer store in Brighton.  Of course, the parking lot was full and I had to walk at least 175 miles to get in the store and I purposefully and quickly strode way to the back of the store--their typing paper and mailing supplies area.  They had one box of greeting card envelopes--in assorted, lovely pastel colors.  I do not want to send out my Christmas cards in pale pink, blue, violet or green envelopes!.  I strode back to the front of the store.  By now, hips, back and legs were nearly incapable of carrying me along.  In fact I noticed, I was staggering a bit and walking quite like a person who had tasted a bit to many glasses of Peach Schnapps!

Just as I was exiting the building, a lady with a cane said, "Where are all the shopping carts?"  I looked, and there were none.  "I'll get you one," I said and promptly staggered out to the parking lot and the nearest cart corral and brought back a cart.  

"Oh!  Thank you my dear, that was so nice of you."

"Merry Christmas", I called as I staggered out of sight.

175 miles back to my car, dragging my right leg the last 100 miles and there, on the ground by my car, was a Meijer bag.  Inside was...8 Christmas cards WITH ENVELOPES.  I grabbed the bag and groaned, then staggered back to the store and the Customer Service to turn them in.  I so wanted to keep the envelopes, but you know...it isn't worth going to Hell for stealing 8 envelopes!!

I sat in the car for a moment to see if I were still capable of returning home--to my simmering pot of spaghetti sauce left on the stove because the trip was only going to take 20 minutes and said, "Dear Lord--what is the chances of this area having no greeting card envelopes?"

He didn't answer, so I just came home.  Got on the computer and ordered from staples on-line.  I should have them by Monday.

Item #3:  Although Maggie The Cat knows that it is a "No No" to mess with the Christmas tree and although, during the day, Maggie is quite the wonderful kittie and does not disturb a thing, apparently she is quite smart enough to know that once I am either out of the house, or sleeping soundly, it is her chance to tug the crystal beaded rope from the lowest branches and take down a few ornaments also.  There they were laying on the tree skirt and Maggie?  She was quite contentedly napping in the sun by the window.

Item #4:  The way "they" pack ground beef nowadays, if you want to brown it into separated crumbles like, you have to keep chopping it with a spoon or something like that.  Otherwise, it will brown into chunks of meat.  I do not want chunks of meat in my spaghetti sauce, I want crumbled up browned ground beef.  Because the pot I use is so tall, I have to elevate my arthritic right elbow and keep chopping with a long handled spatula while the meat browns.  Chopping, turning, chopping, turning.  By the time I am done, my right elbow and shoulder kill me!!
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I guess that is all the Breaking News and griping I have for today.  Have a nice weekend, I will for sure.

See ya Monday!