title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

A Nice Day

Look what came in the mail today!

I finally saved up enough $$ to order 10 copies of my last print book.  



Speaking of books, I have been writing my How To book in Book Wright by Blurb.  They will print it out for me, BUT, it is too many pages long, with too many photos and would cost me an arm and two legs to afford to get it printed for distribution.

Speaking of books, I also finished my Family History book that I want to give my kids, also with Blurb.  BUT, it is too long and has too many photos and would cost me over $100.00 PER BOOK to get one printed.  

SO--I am copying them off the Blurb site and putting them into Word.  THEN--I will go on a search at Staples or somewhere and find the kind of paper I want and...print them out and bind them myself!!!
OR, check at the printing company just up the road.

SO THERE!!

I want to get some sort of paper that is kind of like what they use in a magazine--kind of shiny, but not as heavy as photo paper.  It will probably cost me $100.00 in paper and ink, but that will cover at least 5 copies of the Family History book.  For the How To book, I will do the same and then if anyone wants it, I can print and bind a copy for them.  Figure out how much one copy costs, and just charge them that and postage.  I don't need a profit.  I just need the cost of this fun book.

SO THERE!!!

Now, my surrogate daughter Chrissy, (my daughter from another mother) wants me to test one of her crochet patterns.  This sounds like fun and will give me a new project to work on while watching baseball games.  She will pay me for my time and supplies.  Win-Win!

SO THERE!!!

I am a woman on a mission.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

I Feel Even Better!

Yesterday I decided that I would go to the doc's office to get a blood draw to check my Potassium.  Pearl mentioned that she had an appointment with him at 10:30 and I told her she could ride with me.

I picked her up.  When we got to the office, she walked up to sign in and the receptionist said, "Are you Pearl Johnson?"


"No.  Pearl Ott.  I have a ten-thirty appointment."


"Ah-hh.  You have a ten-thirty appointment this coming Thursday, not today."


"What's today?"


"Tuesday."


"Oh."


So Pearl sat down next to me and, even though I had heard the conversation, she repeated:


"I'm here on the wrong day.  I have to come back...ah...wait..." and she got up and went back up to the receptionist's desk.


"Tell me again.... when am I suppose to come in.  Tomorrow at nine-thirty, right?"


"No, this coming Thursday--April thirtieth, at ten-thirty.  I will give you a card."


So Pearl sat in the waiting room while I got my blood drawn.


On the way home we talked.


"I could have sworn on a stack of Bibles that my appointment was today.  I know I wrote it on my calendar."


"Did you think today is Thursday?"


"No!  I know what day it is.  Good Lord!"


"Maybe you should start taking your Aricept again."


"I took it for two days and I didn't think it helped."


"You have to take it at least two weeks for it to start having any effect."


"I hate taking pills!"


"Not me!  If it helps me, I'll take anything they got!"


"I don't want to take Alzheimer's medicine.  I hate the thought."


"But if it helps--at least it will help stop your forgetfulness from advancing so rapidly."


"I hate this!  The same thing happened Sunday.  We had plans to go out with Bonnie and Earl for supper and at five, Merle asked me if I was ready.  I said, 'ready for what?'  I thought it was Monday--all day."

======================

This makes me sad!!!

Monday, April 27, 2015

Hip Hip Hooray!

I can't explain how great I feel today!

I think I found the one new med that was causing all my problems.  Didn't take it yesterday and today, I have not been wobbley or disoriented and only a bit dizzy and I know that is from the water pill.

I researched that new med--Clonidine.  It helps lower BP, but it is also used for ADHD, anxiety, to help people stop addictions, etc.  So, it is also an anti-psychotic med and I sure as heck don't need that.  I recognized my symptoms because they were exactly like the ones I had when a doc put me on Seroquil and Effexor and when I tried Chantix years ago.  I was falling down, having mini seizures.

I already take an anti-depressant, anti-anxiety med, I sure didn't need another one messing up my head.

My BP has been so good today--in the 130-140 ranges with diastolic in the mid 50's.  While my pulse rate is still in the 40's low 50's--it's been that way for two years now.

You should see the report I have kept and giving to the doc.  He will see exactly every med I took, when I took it, my BP every 4 hours and what I felt like each day.

I'm a good guinea pig!!!
==================
Dar was over today and I did not take my BP after she left because I was scared it would be way high.

She walked in and said, "Are you all right?"

I said, "No!"

and she said, "Me either.  I went over to tell my brother and sister-in-law goodbye, but they had left at 7:00 this morning.  My other sister-in-law told me that they said they were going to leave before I got there because they were afraid I'd get hysterical.  Well, I got hysterical all right, but it was because I didn't get to say good-bye.  Daddy is leaving on the 13th, my birthday and then...I will be all alone."

"Sorry."

"I just don't think I am going to be able to take it!!!"

"Good thing you have a job to keep you occupied."

...and the rest was all about her.  She didn't come over to check on me.  She came over to dump on me.  Once again--


but--I don't care.  I watched my soap, did the laundry and worked on my How To book the rest of the afternoon.

Then I watched an hour of the riots in Baltimore.  I swear those people act like ignorant savages.  They don't fear the authorities anymore and the cops are so scared of being sued, they don't do their jobs.

30 years ago, while visiting a friend in Baltimore, I saw how unreasonable the police could be to blacks--because I was with one, in a group of blacks that weren't doing a thing.  Now, they've killed this kid because they arrested him for "making eye contact" with them?  Similar to what it was like 30 years ago, so I know t his police brutality has gone on there for a long time.

But now, these damn black kids think they are entitled to loot and steal and burn and throw rocks at the cops?

Turn a water cannon on them!  Shoot them with rubber bullets.  Make them a bit scared so they will think next time.

This is a no win situation in our country and I place the blame for it squarely on the person who lives in the White House.  He has empowered them to think they can get away with this crap--telling them, "that boy could have been my son" and Sharpton and all the rest of the race baiters!

Dear Dr. King, God bless him,  must be spinning in his grave!!!

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Hello!

Toughest six days I've had in a long time.  BUT--I think I am finally settling in and I feel much better today.  I have switched around the new meds--like taking one at a different time of day, and splitting one in half and taking 1/2 at 8:00 and the other 1/2 at noon.  Yes--self diagnosing and medicating, but I have researched these meds and I am doing the same thing the doc would do.

My blood pressure is reasonable now..and my pulse rate has stabilized into the 40's range, which is still too low, but I can live with it.

I kid you not--I've have been through some interesting things.  Not only dizziness, and a mild seizure thingie, but hallucinations and hearing voices.  Really.

Friday, I came out of the bathroom and headed to my chair.  About half-way there, I thought I was going to pass out.  When I got to the chair, I put my hand on the arm and sat down on the box next too it.  I looked at the chair and couldn't remember exactly what it was or how to get on it.  Scary--thought I had had a T.I.A.

I was sitting in this computer room and saw a bright red, blue and yellow plastic ball rolling down the street out in front.  I stood up to get a better look and there was no ball there.  Another time I saw a man walking down the street in front, but when I looked out the window, there was no one.

I tried to heat up a bowl of Chili in the microwave and couldn't remember how.  I decided to put it back in the refrigerator, but later when I went to get it to try again, it wasn't in the frig.  I thought maybe I had eaten it after all, but I started opening cupboards and the stove and...found it on the top rack in the dishwasher!

I thought I had had a stroke or Alzheimer's had set in fast!!

I canceled all my appointments for two weeks, because I certainly can't drive.  I will go into the doc's office on Tuesday morning to get blood drawn to see how my Potassium level is,  I have a regular appointment with him on May 7th, hope to have this figured out by then.

Sorry I couldn't post much as my eyes were very blurry and I couldn't remember some words.
======================

I am feeling better and today, went outside and looked at all my gardens and set up my porch railing planters to get ready to plant in a couple of weeks.

I did get something accomplished, as I have mostly sat in my recliner for the past week.  I got my fifth quilt done to go into the great grandbabies box of quilts.







I think I need a new crochet project--kind of tired of cross stitching.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

What?

My blood pressure is down, but the new meds are making me wonder--who am I and where am I?

Such a disoriented feeling in my head.  I stagger when I walk.  

I get up take my blood pressure, take my meds and go back to bed for an hour.

I get up, take my blood pressure, eat, watch my soap and take a nap for an hour.

I wake up, take my blood pressure, stare out the window, eat, watch TV, take my meds, go to bed.

BUT--my blood pressure IS down.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Action Plan

So the doc comes in, after having looked at the reports I had left for him yesterday and said,  "I really appreciated these reports and suggestions.  I want you to keep recording your blood pressure for the next two weeks.  Three times a day, just as you have been doing."

"Okay."

"I have thought about this a lot.  It is going to be tricky to keep your blood pressure low and yet keep your pulse rate up."

So, he took me off two meds I have been on for years, put me on two new ones and double the Lasix.

We shall see, I go back in two weeks.  

I have tons of bottles of new meds and old meds, tried and stopped.  So if any of you want drugs, just let me know.  They won't make you high, but they will make you dizzy---if that floats your boat, LOL.

I no sooner got home and Wal-Mart called that my new prescriptions were ready, so back up I went.  Got some milk and English muffins.  Thankfully I had a Wal-Mart GC from my adopted daughter.  I was suppose to use it to buy myself a bouquet, but it paid for my prescriptions.

I now have $2.00 in my billfold, $10.50 in my checking account and $11.00 on my food card.  I should be good for the rest of the month.

Life sure can be interesting at times!

Monday, April 20, 2015

Egads and Little Fish Hooks!!!

Cold and rainy today with a bitter wind.  Kind of matches my mood.

To the doc's office early to get a blood draw.  A different nurse and she can't seem to find a good vein and have I mentioned?  I HATE NEEDLES!!!

I left a report for the doc to look at before I go back, late tomorrow afternoon.  A list of the meds I was on when the AFib hit and a list of the ones I am on now.  Also a list of my BP three times a day--that oughta scare him, I know it sure does me.  Questions and suggestions we might try to lower the BP again and in large letters:  WE NEED TO COME UP WITH AN ACTION PLAN!

The lowest my BP has been all week was 179/58.  Did you know if you have a high number that the bottom number should be higher too?  With the bottom number low, it is not a good thing.  With 179 Systolic, I should be in at least the 70's, diastolic.  

I went back to taking 30 mg of my BP med, twice a day, like I was on before, as the 20mg wasn't doing a thing.  Unfortunately, neither is the 30mg.  

Last night, my BP was 213/79--this morning 197/62.  Pulse rate: 48.  THIS IS NOT GOOD!!
=====================
Dar came over at 11:00, just as I was trying to relax in my recliner and maybe catch a tiny nap.  

"I got the glider chair."

"Cool.  What is a glider chair and why did you get one?"

"It was my Dad's.  Pat and my brother are moving next week and they sent Dad's chair home with me."

"Okay."

"I am really feeling forsaken."

"Why?"

"Well, Pat and my brother are moving to Arizona and Dad will be flying out to get a new place next month and....I'm going to be all alone."

"Your brother Mike and his wife are still here."

"I don't like her."

"Oh."

"I feel like I'm not good enough and that is why everyone is moving away from me."

"Oh good grief!  They are moving because your brother wants to live in Arizona and so does your Dad.  That's the only reason."

"It doesn't feel that way to me."

"Good thing you have a job or you'd drive yourself crazy."

"I think that is the only thing that will save me."

"I think YOU think too much!"

"I'm going to go get my hair cut at one today."

"That will make you feel better.  I'm going to have to cut this short.  I'm not feeling well and I wanted to catch a little nap."

"Oh...okay."
<not so much as a question on why I didn't feel well--cause you know--IT'S ALL ABOUT HER!>
===========================
Off to the Chiropractor at 2:00.  My neck feels better anyway

Got a Subway with my gift card, on the way home.

Hopefully tomorrow brings some sort of explanation of the BP and how to fix it!!!