title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Monday, November 2, 2020

A Shocking Experience

 

I had not felt well most of the week.  My blood pressure was high as was my pulse rate.

I woke up in a sweat on the morning of October 29th.   My blood pressure was 197 and my pulse rate was 135 beats per minute.  My balance was off and I found it difficult to walk.

I had started a new drug—Metoprolol Extended Release on the 9th of September and it had been working well to keep my pulse rate and BP within normal ranges.

On October 7th, I had a heart monitor to wear for a week.  The results had come back that there had been “no events” with my heart and everything was normal.

On the morning of the 29th, I took my Metoprolol Extended Release pill.  An hour later, I found I couldn’t stand or walk without becoming weak and faint feeling.  The rest of the morning and early afternoon, I stayed in my chair, only getting up to go to the bathroom.  I had to hold onto the table and the wall to walk to the bathroom without fainting.  I thought perhaps I had a mild stroke.  I prayed off and on most of the day for God to help me.

Around 4:00 in the afternoon, I was sitting in my chair, reading, when all of a sudden I felt an electric shock hit my upper right arm, cross my body and go out my upper left arm, it jolted me.  This was immediately followed by extreme cold inside my body.

I didn’t have a chill.  My skin wasn’t cold.  It was icy cold in my body core—from chest down to my hips.  This lasted for a few seconds and was gone.

I put my book down and laid back in my chair, trying to breathe normally and relax.

About a half an hour later, I noticed that my head was clear.  I got up and walked to the bathroom with no feeling of faintness nor weakness.

I felt quite well, although tired, for the rest of the day and evening.

I had an appointment with the Cardiologist on October 30th.  I woke that morning feeling well.

I walked from the car into the Cardiologist building with no problem, my balance seemed fine.  My BP was 174/68.  My pulse rate 66 bpm.

When the Cardiologist came into the exam room, we talked about the heart monitor test and she said it was great.  I had no problems with my heart.  Then I told her of what had happened the day before.

She said she had never heard of such a thing and asked me to describe how it had felt again.  As I told her of the “shock”, she just stared at me. 

“There is no physical explanation for that happening,” she said.  “I have never heard of anything like that.  Maybe you were touched by an Angel,” she said and then laughed.

I was still feeling good when I left her office that I drove into Brighton, stopped at the Meijer gas station, then on to the Meijer grocery store where I spent an hour buying groceries.  I drove home, carried in all the groceries and put them away.

Although my back hurt, which is normal after a grocery trip, I felt fine.  That evening, my blood pressure was 145/66, my pulse rate was 62.

I have tried to find out what caused this “shock”.  I have Googled it and searched.  There is nothing even mentioned about such an event.

I wanted to document it before I forgot the details.  I have no explanation.  It cannot be explained.  I give all the credit to God.  What else could it be?

Friday, October 30, 2020

 Proof of GiGi's Leaf  Dive.

I was telling a friend about my Snow Angel fall into the leaf pile and she wouldn't believe me.

"It didn't happen unless you have photos to prove it, "she said.

So---------------------







My two birthday girls.






Sunday, October 25, 2020

 Saturday Morning--

I have a big adventure this afternoon.
My daughter Karen and Great Granddaughter Della's shared birthday party and I get to go.
I'm pretty excited about it.
The power steering on my car has been quiet so I know the p.s. fluid tank is full and I am confident I can get there and back with no problems.
Of course, I will ask God to keep me safe, and I know He will, which gives me even more confidence.
See ya all later--Jude

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Saturday Night---

I would write about my adventure today, but I am sooooooo tired that I can't think clearly. LOL

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Sunday Morning---

My Saturday adventure.
I drove through Brighton on my way down to Karen and Mark’s for the October Birthdays party, I noticed a full-blown, block long, sidewalk Trump rally. People holding up signs and flags and cheering. Well, I got right into it, blowing my car horn, rolling down the car window and holding my hand up high with the thumb up, cheering inside my car. It actually gave me goose-bumps. It seemed every car, in all four lanes, coming and going, was blowing their horns and yelling out the car windows. Never any doubt which way this area votes in any election.

When I got to Karen’s, the little birthday girl Della and her little brother Harrison, along with the parents and grandparents were getting their jackets on to go play in the leaf pile. I looked out the window and, there was an enormous leaf pile. Della came back inside and said, “I want GiGi to come play in the leaves.” Wait a minute. GiGi? That would be me! YIKES!
The enormous leaf pile was down on the lower level of their yard. The last time I was down there, it took every ounce of strength and a day long back ache, to climb that hill back up to the house. Oh, what the heck--I put on my jacket.

The going down the yard was pretty easy. I stood by the leaf pile and watched Della’s Daddy and Grandpa, “swimming” through the pile, under the leaves, playing shark. I started singing Baby Shark. Then, to this minute I have no idea what happened to my reasoning, but I spread out my arms like I was going to make a snow angel, and fell backwards into the leaf pile.
I sank down into the leaves and felt them cover me. It was sort of blissful…to peek up through the leaves covering my face and see the sky.

I sat up for a while and threw leaves at the kids, then it was time for me to get up.
Now I was faced with the consequences of my impulsive actions. I couldn’t get up. There was no way I could stand up from that position. I called Karen to help me. She grabbed my hand and pulled—that didn’t work. So she called Grandpa Mark, he took my other hand and they pulled—that didn’t work and it hurt my back and legs when I tried to push myself up. I asked them not to pull me, but just set their feet, hold my hands and I would use their strength to pull myself up—that didn’t work either. I have no leg or arm strength.

The thought went through my mind that we might have to call 911 for help. What I should have done is have my grand son-in-law Mike to come, stand behind me and while Karen and Mark pulled me, he could lift me up under my arms. Mike is about 10 feet tall and a strong young man. Didn’t think of that until afterwards………….Mark and Karen pulled and I tried to push with my feet and legs and finally I was standing up. The pain that was shooting through my hips, back and legs was…intense, for lack of a better word. Now I had to climb the hill to get back up to the house. Karen walked along beside me, I was holding onto her arm and we took that hill at an angle and…I made it.

The rest of the afternoon was wondrous. Oldest Grandson Marcus, whose birthday was Oct. 19th, opened his gifts, then Della and Karen opened their gifts—the amount of gifts Della received, looked like a birthday and Christmas combined. I got to play a little bit with Maddie’s little guy Ben, and Della’s little brother Harrison and talk to my grandkids and Della’s other Grandma. There were lots of hugs and laughter and fun.
Then at 4:30, I realized that I could hardly walk and it was time to head home. I was hurtin’ for certain.

The icing on the cake, so to speak. I found out I will have another Great Grand Baby this coming Spring!

The moral of this story—you just gotta dive in! You just gotta play and make memories. You can rest the next day, but you just gotta Carpe Diem!!!
Today, I am recovering and surprised that I don’t ache as much as I thought I would. I am remembering and smiling at each memory of yesterday. I am rejoicing in the fact that I got to experience it all.

Thursday, October 8, 2020

 Yesterday I got to drive up the road to the Cardiologist's office and get a heart monitor stuck on my chest.  Not one of those hold fashioned Holter Monitor's with the 20 leads stuck all over your chest and a heavy bag to carry around on your shoulder, this one is small.



It has a smart phone sized recording and battery pack that I have to keep within 30 feet of me and if I have a "symptom", like a rapid heart rate, I put the info into the smart phone thingie.

I guess this the newest thing out there and probably the Cardiologist is promoting it, as there were 3 other people in the office getting one stuck on their chest too.

Well, since, at my suggestion, they changed my one med to a time-released one, my heart rate has been in the 60's and my BP in the 126 range, SO--I don't think I am going to have any symptoms to record, but..............it's kind of cool.....to have a mini EKG recording all the time.

In a week, I take it off, bag everything up and Fed Ex it back to the maker, where they check the readings and send a report to my Cardiologist...which I see again on Oct. 30th.

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Did you watch the VP debate?  I didn't, but the big news seems to be there was a fly sitting on Mr. Pence's head for two whole minutes and he just ignored it.

I don't watch any of the debates anymore.  I am not an undecided voter and I don't need to waste my time listening to lies and misinformation and the interrupting and rude behavior that seems the content of our debates.

Which reminds me.  I gotta get my absentee ballot up to the township clerk's drop box.  It's only a mile away--an easy drive and drop off.

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My Jennifer is here from New Jersey, on a business trip.  The first time since the shutdown in March.  Karen is going to have a cook-out on Saturday so we can all get together.  I am going because it is the only way I will get to see Jen.  On these trips from NJ to the MI law firm she works for, she is always too busy to drop in--or at least that is the excuse I hear.

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I hope my son Mark will be there.  His cancer has come out of remission and he has been in the hospital-out patient for more tests.  

I am finishing up all my medical appointments that were canceled in March.  Got my Flu shot the other day.  The week of the 19th, I have an appointment with the Pulmonologist to tell me that my lung CT scan was fine--which I already know because I read the report on my Patient Portal and then the 22nd I have a dental cleaning.  I hate going to the Dentist.  Why do I hate going to the Dentist?  For a cleaning?  It's not like I have to have a root canal....or maybe I'm scared that she will find evidence that I DO need a root canal!

ARRGH!!!

See ya--Jude

 

Saturday, October 3, 2020

 I don't quite know what it is, but I just can't seem to tend to my blog.

Sure, I can use the excuse that I have been working on a large genealogy and after working for hours on the computer, I am not in the mood to get creative and post on my blog.

While that excuse is true, there is just something else.

Some sort of deep weariness or depression, or a feeling of dread at what is going to happen next, that has come to live in my mind for the last few months.  Plus, I'm lonely.

Which is real stupid!  I don't see my kids very often in normal times, but it seems now, I CAN'T see them, so I guess it makes it feel worse.  It's like when we get snowed in and I look outside and realize I can't drive my car to go anywhere, EVEN THOUGH I don't need to go anywhere--it's the knowing I can't that makes me antsy.

I should be elated!  I finished a large genealogy and mailed it off.  My client lives in Oregon and had to evacuate to her son's home, but her home was saved, so I could mail the genealogy directly to her.  I had already received her check--considering it was 3 genealogies, one of her, her son and her daughter--it was a nice check.

I have another, not so much a genealogy, but a family story.  My client had files and files full of information on each parent and sibling.  Her parents and grandparents from Hungary, so I had what I needed.  It was just putting it into chronological order, with the story written around it.  I love it and am nearly finished with it.  My client is a younger sister to a best friend.  My friend died in 1995, so when I got to her file folder and saw her photo, it brought back some teary memories.  Oh, she would have loved this book.

I have another genealogy waiting in the wings.

So, I am busy and my mind is flourishing with being challenged to be creative.

...and the extra money certainly takes the budget worries away, for a time anyway.

So.  What is the problem?  

My back hurts--normal in my life.

My left foot hurts and I walk funny--nearly normal.

I go days without going anywhere--normal in my life.

=======================

I just don't know.  I am weary.  I am nervous.  I feel like I am waiting for the next awful world event to happen.  What horrible thing is going to happen.

I pray a lot.  I talk to God a lot during the day.  I consider myself to have a deep faith.  Apparently I am lacking in that or I would be doing better.  

I keep telling myself to be grateful that I am in good health.  Be grateful that right now, I have no money worries.  Just be grateful...and I am, but...........................


 

Thursday, September 17, 2020

 Neighbor and friend Pearl was in the hospital two weeks ago.

I posted a while back that she has been "living" in her recliner.  Having such a hard time walking that she even slept in it.

Two weeks ago, she couldn't manage even to get up on her feet so they took her in.  She was having terrible pain in her legs and they thought she might have a blood clot.  She did not.

Then, they predicted that she had Leukemia.  She was sent home, but in bad shape.

I haven't been in her house to sit down and talk to her since her birthday March 1st.  Then the whole shutdown started.  Some days, I would walk down to her house and peek into her living window.  If she was awake, we'd try and talk and make sign signals and try and read each others lips and laugh.

Home Hospice came in this past Monday, complete with the requisite hospital bed.  Her daughter who has been with Merle and Pearl for the last couple of months, wasn't able to move Pearl around or get her up to get dress, so the taller bed helped.

Her daughter, with the help of the Hospice Aide did manage to get Pearl into her wheel chair and take her out into the sun on Tuesday.  Neighbor Jackie saw them and went over to talk to Pearl.  She said, Pearl only said, "Hi" and  just sat in the chair, looking down at the ground.

Jackie called me this morning at 9:00 to let me know, Pearl died around midnight.  I got dressed and scooted right down there.  

The daughter was there and Merle and her other daughter and the Hospice aide....and Pearl.  I happened to think that she looked just like I had seen her many times.  Asleep, with her mouth open, but....

this time...........................

I went over, bent down and kissed her forehead and tried to hug her.  I had forgotten how cold and gray a person is when they have died.

====================

Her daughter mentioned they were trying to find a good photo of her for the newspaper obituary and that they remembered I had taken some photos of Pearl at her and Merle's 60th wedding anniversary.

So, I scooted home, turned on my computer and into the picture files and found a couple that were okay.  I printed them out and took them back down to their house.  By then a couple of her grandkids had showed up and were visibly upset, so I scooted out of there.

When I got back home, I looked again at the photos and I must have missed looking at all of them them the first time because there was one, in the center of the file that was the best photo of her taken in 2013.  So, I printed that one off and back down to the house---it's only 60 steps away.

I wondered why the funeral home hadn't come to pick Pearl up.  She had been gone 10 hours, but as I walked home, I saw her son and his wife and kids drive up.  

As Pearl is going to be cremated, they must have been waiting for family members to arrive to "see" her one last time?  Too bad they didn't come to visit while she was still alive?  But then--Pearl had alienated her two oldest kids, so..............

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Finally at round 1:00 this afternoon, a black, unmarked SUV showed up and took her away.  Done so swiftly and carefully that none of the neighbors would even know what was going on.

In fact, Dar called me shortly after they left and asked, "Do you know what's going on over at Pearl and Merle's?"  Her house does not face the street so she wouldn't have seen all the cars coming and going.

Their daughter said, "Now we have to worry about what to do with Dad."  Merle has Parkinsons Disease, but he is strong, walks everyday and some days, rides his bike around the park.

I said, "Well, you don't have to worry about that right now.  Wait and see how he does.  Let him feel his way along for awhile.  You'll be here everyday and you can keep track on if he is taking care of himself."

I said that because it was almost like she was ready to ship him to a home tomorrow and I know, as an old person, that I would want to be alone for awhile to get over the shock and used to the idea of being alone and just see how it went.  

Two weeks ago, Merle had requested that his daughter (a cigarette smoker) give him one of her cigarettes.  When she refused, he asked her if she would buy him a pack of Swisher Sweets--little, thin cigars.  He'd smoke two a day, out in his shed.  When she told me, she said, "Are you shocked that I'd do that?"

I answered, "Heck no. Why not?  At 85 years old, let him enjoy the days he has left."


Pearl Elaine Ott
March 1, 1936-September 17, 2020

    




Saturday, September 5, 2020

It's been awhile, hasn't it?

I have been working on a genealogy for a client that has taken on a life of its own.  She decided she wanted one done for her son, which is like hers, but with photos of his family added.  Then she decided she wanted one for her daughter, who has a different father, and then the daughter notified me that she also wanted her husband family done too--so that their daughter and grand children would have all their ancestor's in the same book.

My client's book is 162 pages, her son's is 170 pages and her daughter's is 240 pages.

I am starting to print out the books this weekend and of course am having printer problems--because that is just a Murphy's Law kind of thing.

Other than that, my grandson that was supposed to have a big wedding on June 6th, and ended up having a small wedding, on June 6th and their big reception this past weekend.  Most of us that attended the small wedding stayed home from the reception so they could invite more of their friends---because of the social distancing and only a certain number of people at gatherings in our State.

It was waaaaay too far away and too long of a weekend for me to tolerate anyway.  
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Other than that--I spent some time in the ER last week, chest pain and come to find out, it was nerve pain coming from my neck/shoulder blade.  They would give me nothing for the severe pain, telling me that nothing unusual showed up on the heart scans or lung x-rays, so they had no idea what was causing the pain.
I guess if they couldn't "see" the pain, it didn't exist and I was just some old, gray haired junkie trying to score some opiates?
One good thing came out of all of it, I found out my heart is strong and perfect and my lungs are clear and perfect too. The scans also showed my liver, kidneys, pancreas, gall bladder and even spleen are in great shape.
================
Other than that--I got my hair cut Friday.  This lady that Karen referred me to, is the best stylist for short hair that I have had in many years.  She is also expensive, or what I view as expensive=$40.00 for a cut and style.  I did her genealogy for her in a barter for my hair cut two months ago.  Friday I had managed to save $40.00 all month.  When we were done, she wouldn't take any money.  I asked if she would accept a Tip and laid a twenty dollar bill on the counter.  She didn't want to accept that, but she has a small salon and has been closed down.  Then she said that from now on my hair cuts would be $20.00.  I am thinking to myself that $25.00 sounds better.  I can get that much out of my budget every month--that's what I used to pay the stylist that couldn't cut short hair decently.
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Other than that--I am finally over the anxiety that going back to the grocery store all masked up, hampered me for the first 2 months back.  Karen had done all my grocery shopping for 3 months and the first time I tried it on my own, the mask got so hot I couldn't breathe, there seemed to be too many people and I got anxious.  Well, I have now conquered that.  That's mainly how I get my exercise.  To the grocery store every week or 10 days and walk clear to the back and then over to the grocery department, up and down the aisles and finally out--about 3,000 steps.  My legs muscles are getting stronger now too--since I am back on schedule.
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Other than that--I have a bunch of doctor's appointments and yearly tests that I canceled in March to attend to this month.  AND, I have another genealogy awaiting me and still another one on the horizon.  I probably will be busy with them right up to Christmas time.

Are we going to get to celebrate Christmas with our families this year?