title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Non communication can cause all sorts of problems.........

Lack of communication, miscommunication and misunderstandings can cause a whole lot of hurt.  It is such a simple thing to call on the phone or even send an e-mail.

The last thing I heard out of Pam was her statement, "I'm closing up the house, moving to New Jersey and I won't be back for two years."

Karen had said, "Pam is staying in New Jersey with the kids so that Eric and Jen can come to the wedding."

Going on what I (thought) I knew--I was so upset that Pam didn't have time to stopped for--- to me--a "Two year I won't see you", hug and kiss.  Or at my age, "I could die within these two years and never see you again!"

I called my sister after I posted my blog on Monday.  She is in their text "group", so she knows everything that is going on.

She said, "Oh, you know Pam.  She's like Mark.  They make these loud, I don't care, attitude kinds of declarations.  Pam plans on traveling back here three or four times a year."


"Yes and I heard her and Jen talking and Jen insists that Pam attends the wedding with her.  Jen said, 'Eric can stay with the kids.'  So you will see her the second of June."



"It still hurts.  They had time to spend an hour at Karen's, but not 15 minutes to swing by here."

"Yes--they just don't think.  Can you imagine either of us leaving, even on vacation, and not stopping to say bye to Mother and Grandma?"

"No.  We never would have done that."

Then she said, "Oh well.  I say that a lot about Adam (her son.)"

"Oh well, indeed.  Can't do anything about it now, so....."
I felt better after talking with her.  Got busy around here and such a sunny warm day, decided to go out and pick up branches and rake leaves for the yard waste pick-up on Tuesday.

I scrubbed and cleaned the porch furniture, railings and washed off the porch floor.  Then I got all the leaves and sticks into the yard waste bag, dragged it out to the road and walking back to the house, the old fast beating, pounding heart started in.

I thought it was just from walking and hurrying too fast, but then I felt the skipped beats and knew, it was AFib.

I hurried into the house, sat down in my recliner and put the pulse-oxometer on my finger.  100 beats per minute--not real bad, but the skipped beats were annoying.

I walked very slowly to the fridge to get a glass of water, sat back down, laid back and just watched the pulse-ox meter on my finger.

"They" say to give it 20 minutes and then if the heart beats are still pounding and skipping, go to the ER.

Because my resting heart rate is so low, 100 beats a minute makes my whole body shake.  Some people's AFib will go to 150-180 beats per minute.

By 15 minutes--15 very long minutes it seemed, my pulse rate was down to 85 and not skipping anymore.  At 25 minutes, it was at 72 (normal for most people), so I got up and went to the bathroom.

AFib won't kill you, but it can throw a clot.  That's why people with AFib are on blood thinners.  I never worry about blood clots, I just worry that I am going to have to go to ER and then hospital for a couple of days AND...I don't have time for that!!!!!!

The rest of the day I was tired.  Felt like I had run a mile race.  So I took it easy.  Walked down to visit Pearl--she's been home for a week and she and Merle recovering from the flu--that she contracted in the rehab house.
Tuesday, yesterday, I had an appointment at a recommended salon to get my hair cut.  Since my stylist died 2 years ago, I haven't had a decent cut.  Fantastic Sam's, Great Clips, none of those places, although I went into detail of how I wanted it cut, seemed to be able to do it.

I knew that I knew where the salon was, so off I went into Brighton.  The streets in that town are laid out in a peculiar manner, but this place was on Main street--which is very narrow, lined with cute little speciality stores.

I parked in back and couldn't find the place.  I finally stuck my head into one of the businesses and asked.  I was 2 blocks away!!

Back in the car, started down a street, that dead-ended, wandered around until I got back on Main Street.  Trying to watch traffic and check names on store fronts was a challenge, and then I saw it.

Went up a block, into a parking lot, back out on Main street, which is quite a feat as there is lots of traffic from the high school and NO traffic lights to stop the flow.  However, as I have noticed, the Brighton drivers are very courteous.  If they see you want to merge or get out onto the street, they will stop and let you.

Swung into a spot right in front of the salon. I was 2 minutes early for my appointment.

I figured the cut would cost me 35.00 at least.  I found out last Friday that Karen also goes there on occasion, and that is what her cuts cost.

The stylist was so nice.  She recognized me as she had worked at the other salon where I went for 15 years.  She listened and then she went to work.  My hair was a mess--sticking out in places so I looked like Bozo the Clown, different lengths on each side, longer on the back on one side, shorter on the other.

She did a great job!  Cost me $25.00, I gave her a $5.00 tip and am going back a week before the wedding for a clean-up trim and to get my eyebrows, waxed and arched.

I took this after I had walked in the wind
and rain and it still looks pretty good.
 What a mood lifter!!!

I stopped and bought groceries, carried them all in and felt strong and energized!  Although I did go to be early last night and slept for 12 hours!!
I have much to do today!  My water heater has been fixed for a week and still the clothes I had to remove to get to the WH, are laying in a pile on my bedroom floor--I have to step over them to get to my bed.  It might take me all of 10 minutes to put them away.  GEEZ!!

The dishwasher is full of clean dishes--might take me 10 minutes to put them away.  LORDY!!

Groceries still not put away.  Counter tops cluttered with all manner of things.  EGAD!!

A trip at 2:00 to Walmart to pick-up a prescription.

I can easily get that all done with no strain.

It's amazing how emotional stress can put me down and I don't even care about my surroundings.

Now--Oh well--I don't even care if Pam and Jen come to the wedding!  I don't care if I don't see them until Christmas.  I have bridal showers and a wedding to attend and I'm good to go!


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  2. Your hair looks great! You with that new dress are going to shine at the wedding!

    But I have to ask, is that a mole on your nose? If so, make sure you have it looked at because that's a common place for cancerous moles to grow and I have a one inch scar to prove it. And while I'm scolding you, (LOL) AFib's might not kill you but they can sure mess up your life with a stroke or a heart attack. That's what caused my husband's stroke---he was not on blood thinners and should have been.

    When my x-sister-in-law died she left a list of relatives who were not welcome to come to her private service. She had told her daughter, "If they couldn't bother to see me while I was alive and wanted to see them, then I don't want them crying at my funeral. Lack of communication sure can hurt people's feelings. One day your daughters will regret the example they are setting for their own children on how to treat an elderly parent.

    1. I've had that mole since I was 10. It is part of my face. Last time I had it checked (2 years) it was fine and dandy.

  3. you have the right attitude judy, but i surely understand the hurt. keep busy, keep active like you do...those things keep you happy and young!!

    i love the hair, you and it look great!!

  4. So glad you're feeling a bit better about that fiasco; if that was me I'd probably still be pouting.

    Your hair does look good; I like it. It's worth a little more $$ to get it where you're comfortable with the cut. I'm fortunate in that I do like my stylist and the cut is $15, $5 tip, $20. :)


    1. I can manage $30.00 a month--$25 and $5 tip.
      I used to pay $27.00 at the other salon.

  5. You look lovely! I understand how you feel. Overwhelmed with “stuff” to do. I’m in such a mess myself listing the condo for sale and trying to keep everything put away. Boxes everywhere. It’s really getting to me but I shall get there and you will too!


  6. Glad you got a good cut. Looks great. My last hair cut was not so great, even though I like my hairdresser and she usually does a fine job. She didn't make it short enough and now I need another one already.