title explained

Onward and upward! something that you say in order to encourage someone to forget an unpleasant experience or failure and to think about the future instead and move forward.

My e-mail: jjmiller6213@comcast.net

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Tired Tuesday

The high temperature today was:  69
The humidity was:  34%
Could the weather be any more perfect?  
NO!
===========================================



After working outside yesterday, for a couple of hours--I was hurting so bad that I couldn't get to sleep.  I got up around 1:00 and rummaged in my bathroom cabinet until I found those lovely pain pills they gave me after my hip surgery.  These little miracles are called Percocet.  I took one and slept until 9:00 and got up with no pain and no stiffness.

SO--I decided, I should do more this afternoon.  Three and a half hours spent on the front garden!! I think another Percocet at bedtime is in order.


This is what it looked like in 2006--Fred put an edger around it for me.  It was to showcase my spring flowers.




Fred started giving me lilies for Sweetest Day and I planted them in this garden.  Then I transplanted my Momma Iris and a beautiful purple iris in this bed.



Now it was an Iris and Lily garden, along with the spring bulbs.  I also had a large Lemon Lily, that had been my Mother's, in the middle of the garden.

Then, Jackie, from across the street, thought I needed some Rudbeckia, so I planted one little plant on the west side of the front garden.

Well--four years of not being able to weed or take care of the gardens and--the Rudbeckia  took over--choking out the other plants.  

When Pearl came down this morning, we went outside and discussed what to do.

"Well, that Rebecca has certainly taken over the entire garden!" she said.  (Notice, what she called it :-) )

"You mean, Rudbeckia?"

"You call it what you want--it's name is Rebecca or Brown-Eyed-Susan."

I am not going to fight with Pearl over a plant name--not any more!!  She worked in a garden shop and she knows the name of all plants--remember?

"Well--I'm going to tackle this garden this afternoon and by dusk--there will be NO Black-Eyed Susan's or Brown-Eyed Susan's or Rebecca in it!"  

This has taken over the entire garden.  It looked like a huge planting of just Rudbeckia!

I still have a bit on the west end, but now my garden is back to being Iris and Lilies!!

The pots are filling in nicely.

I wanted to water everything--didn't think my new hose would reach all the way around the front, so I put another section on and watered with Miracle-Gro on everything.

When I was done, I turned off the water and went to un-screw the other hose and--it exploded water all over me with such force--kind of like being hit with a fire hose!  I had forgotten to open the nozzle and drain the hose first,  

OHMYGOSH!!!  I was soaked!!!  I laughed my head off.  Since there was no wet T-shirt contest in the area, I went in and changed.  Water dripping off my head into my eyes---I had just had a shower this morning--I did not need this.  So funny!!!

Come to find out--when it expanded, one length was plenty long enough to reach to the front.  GEEZ!!!

So--tomorrow, I tackle this garden--where I transplanted some Hostas.  It is an area under my Lilac
and Rose of Sharon bushes.  
I need to cut back the spring blub leaves.



This is what it looked like this spring.


Then, I noticed that my back porch was listing to the west--it is NOT on a cement pad.  Over the years, I have put shims under the back and front corners and the outside.  I pushed up on the railing to raise the porch and saw that I needed boards or something to put under the outside edge.

I walked down to Merle and Pearl's and asked him if he had some old wood--"I need a one by four."  He said he did.  I went on home and he came down in about an hour with three pieces of 1x4, about 8 inches long.  I raised the porch again and he put one under the back edge, one under the front edge and I shoved one under the side--in the middle.  Nice and sturdy and level!!!

I thanked him.  He went home.  Then I thought, "Why didn't I have HIM lift the porch and me put the shims under?"  Oh well!!!

"If I have to, 
I can do anything.
I am strong.
I am invincible.
I AM WOMAN!!!!!"

...and my back and arms are screaming tonight!!!










Monday, June 3, 2013

Strange Things

The first Saturday of the month, at precisely noon, the tornado siren west of here goes off--just a test.  They do it every month, starting in May and going through August.  Everyone in the park knows this.  Last Saturday at noon, the siren went off.  No big deal--right?  WRONG!

I heard yelling, looked out the windows in my computer room and Dar was running up and down her driveway yelling, "Tornado!  Tornado!"  I got up from my chair to go out and tell her--but then I saw Pearl's husband, Merle at the end of his driveway.  Dar ran over to him yelling and then...she stopped--he was talking to her and then, she walked back to her house.  That poor woman!!!

===========================================

You know what is really weird?  I don't think about Fred everyday--anymore.  It's been 17 months now.  I'm pretty comfortable living alone--except when severe storms come.

We have a donut shop in town that has been there since 1950.  Fred loved the place and really liked the owner.  Yesterday, I stopped at the donut shop--I had the "need" for a cream filled triangle.  When I went in the owner looked up and said, "Well, how are you? I haven't seen you in a long time!  Where's that hubby of yours? Did he give up sweets?"


I so wanted to say, "Yes he did---permanently", I have that morbid sense of humor.  But instead I went on to tell the owner that Fred had died New Year's Day, 2012.

He got such a look on his face and I noticed that my eyes were tearing up.  What's up with that?  Haven't I said those same words to other people that Fred used to do business with?  The car repair place, the car detail place, his favorite check-out person at Wal-Mart, the ophthalmologist?

and yet--my eyes teared up.  

I guess the knowledge of a loved one's passing never quite goes away?  The pain is there---just under the surface...and it comes out at the strangest times.

Oh--he didn't have any Triangles, but he gave me a free jelly filled Bismark.  
==========================

Today was a perfect day to be outside and playing in the garden.  I put a new edge on the one by my steps--and cut back all the spring flowers--tulips and daffodils, got all the weeds out.  Had to raise the stepping stones as last May, the kids had covered them with mulch :-(.  The only thing--when I put a new edge on my gardens--they somehow get wider and wider,LOL

Many beautiful "gifts" from Fred--lilies coming up nice and big this year.  (Notice--the chair-- for resting :-) )



So--then I tested out my handy dandy green snaky-looking expandable hose today. What I like the most, is the light weight of the thing. I pulled it out to my veggie garden, then went back and turned on the water--the thing grew and grew! Nozzle worked good, but it is cheapo, so it will probably break, but I've got a nice one to use when it breaks. I turned off the water, opened the nozzle to get all water out of the hose and it started wigglying its way through the grass back toward the water connection. Kind of creepy for a person who has a snake phobia, but....it doesn't roll up into a nice coil like they show in the ad, but it is so light weight, you can do it and then...................... I like it!!!


When it started filling with water, it started expanding and looked like
a regular hose.

I just coiled it up and laid it on top of my hose reel thingie.

Pearl doesn't want one unless it coils back up to the hose connection, in a nice neat, coil.  HAH!


As I was coming back up to the front porch--glad I had my camera--I spotted a Yellow Swallow Tail butterfly on my Geranium.  I haven't seen a Swallow Tail in quite a few years.   It was a strange and unexpected happening!!




Another strange thing--I opened up Face Book when I got back in the house and there are pictures of my grand daughter Susanna hanging with the Little Big Town band members.  I didn't even know she knew these celebrities!  I wrote a comment that "Gramma is worried that you are with celebrities and you have on shorts that are torn!"  Hope she understands my humor.  I am sure the shorts and the beat up denim jacket were purchased new looking like that.




I am aching tonight!!  Hard to get up from my chair and walk--everything is stiff and sore.  BUT--tomorrow will be a day just like today--68 degrees and sunny--and I will be back outside, weeding and cleaning up my other gardens.

Thank you, God that I CAN do all this.  I am having the best time!!!




Sunday, June 2, 2013

Monday Montage

One evening, I sat down across the room to eat supper, looked
up and this is what I saw.



One day, I sat down across the room to eat lunch, looked
up and this is what I saw.





Yesterday morning, I saw down across the room to eat breakfast, looked
up and this is what I saw.  
Maggie looking out the window at a large Mourning Dove, 
Scaredy Cat Buddy hunkered down, ears going flat, peeking
over the window sill.




Friday I went to the ortho surgeon for my 3 and 1 year 
check-up and this is what my replaced hips look like.  
How would you like to know all that metal is inside you?  
Creeps me out!!!  What if it gets rusty?



Saturday, Pearl came down and brought me a "tulip" from the 
Tulip Poplar tree behind her place.  
This is what SHE calls a Tulip Tree.

Loaded with yellow blooms, although you can't see them.


Saturday afternoon, I looked up and this is what I saw.
"Yoda" taking a bath.

Then he took a nap.


Sunday afternoon, I looked up and Yoda was taking another bath--
this time sitting on the floor.

Then, he took another nap.


Meanwhile--Maggie stares out the bedroom window at the bushes.


A bloom off my "Momma Iris"--it is more peach then it looks.
My Mother planted it in 1968--the fall after she died, I went
up to the house and dug up one tuber.  
I have since given tubers to my daughter's and sister,
and everywhere I have lived since 1970, has this Iris
plant in a garden there.
======================================================

Life is cut short.  

The extra lap for Buddy and Maggie is gone.  

My Mother has been gone 43 years.  

Yet--life and Mother Nature go on. 

I wish they made replacements for broken hearts! 





Wednesday, May 29, 2013

The Forty-Two Year Secret



My sister and I, now, are the only two people on this earth that know this secret.  It has hounded us for 42 years.  Sometimes, in anger or in retaliation, we have wanted to shout it out and say, "You think you know everything?  Well--you don't know anything.  How about some truth, for once in your life!!"

It will do me good to get it written out.  You don't have to read it--it is more a "purge" via journaling then anything.  A catharsis for my mind.  Glad I didn’t post it on the last blog, but--now I can.  I need to do this.
=========================

In 1940 a young man from Detroit moved out onto the farm bordering my parents farm. It was war time.  If you were a farmer, you were deferred from serving.  His mother was wealthy--the farm next to her brother's came up for sale.  She bought it and sent her son out to live on it.

This man, Clarence and my Daddy became very good friends.  My Daddy, a farmer all his life, helped the man learn how to till and plant the fields.  He went with him to an auction sale to purchase some cows.  They hunted in the woods that separated their farms.

My Daddy and mother had been married about 2 years--I was 1 at the time.  My Daddy and Mother's best friends in our small town, had a sister.  All these "kids" knew each from high school.  She was 2 years younger then my parents.  My Daddy and Mother set Clarence and this young woman, Helen up on their first date.  They were married in 1942. Of course, the four of them were now fast friends.  They did many things together, spent a lot of time together.

Clarence and Helen had a daughter in 1945.  She and I became play-mates.  They had another daughter in 1949--my sister was born in 1952.  The four of us girls were together--like sisters.  In fact, until we were older, we thought we were related.  We all loved each other a lot.  We went camping together--spent many happy times together.  Helen was so nice to me.  She made Salmon Patties, which I loved, and if I was down at their house playing, she'd ask me to stay for supper when she made them.  We had so many wonderful times together.  

My Mother didn't have a best friend type of relationship with Helen.  Helen liked to gossip and my mother would never say a bad thing about anyone.  They had another friend Florence.  If Helen was with Mother, she'd talk about Florence.  Mother told me once, "people that gossip about others TO you, will gossip about YOU to them."

Things were good though--Florence and her husband Richard were also friends and the three family's had hot dog roasts nearly every Sunday evening in the summer, card parties every other Saturday during the winter and they vacationed together about once a year--when the men hired men to come in and do the milking and chores for them.
===========================

Fast forward to 1969.

It was June of 1969--near my birthday, but I don’t remember what day.  I had been to the doctor for my annual check up.  As I drove home, I decided to stop in and visit my folks.  As I was about to turn into the driveway, I saw Clarence driving out, so I stopped in the road, knowing that as he turned to go home, he would stop and chat.  He waved out the window and turned right to go south on Vernon Road.  I wondered where he was going. 

Mother and Daddy were sitting on the patio.  As I walked up, I noticed Mother was crying and Daddy was leaning forward, his arms propped on his knees, his head in his hands.

I asked what was the matter and Mother told me that Clarence had just come from the doctor.  He had not been feeling well, had a bit of pain in his chest and had some blood tests and x-rays done a week before.  Today, he had been told by the doctor that he had a blood clot, traveling in his blood stream.  It would either lodge in his brain, his lungs or his heart.  There was nothing they could do and he told Clarence he had about six months to live.

Clarence had stopped to tell Daddy and Mother and asked them to “take care of Helen” afterwards.   He also made them promise not to tell her EVER that he knew he was going to die.  He wanted to protect her now and in the future.

Mother and Daddy promised him and he left, on his way to Florence and Richard's to tell them.  I learned later that he asked Florence and Richard if they would go up to the cottage at Christmas time in case something happened to him then.  He didn’t want Helen to be alone way up in Michigan's UP.

He quit smoking immediately as the doctor had told him, smoking would make the blood clot move faster.  Within the next few months, he bought a self-propelled combine and a new camper.  He told Daddy that he paid for credit life insurance on them so that when he died, they would be paid for and that he wanted Daddy to have them and work on the farm, until Helen could get things straightened out. 

Clarence died December 26th 1969 up north, while the four of them were out riding snow mobiles.  Richard and Florence were with them and brought Helen home.

Helen use to call my Daddy to come down and help with things.  She couldn't figure out how to turn the thermostat up to get heat (?)  She didn't know how to use the garage door opener (?)  My Mother thought at times it was a ploy, to get Daddy down there, but then she knew Helen was lonely and she knew my Daddy had promised to help and she trusted my Daddy.

When Mother got very sick, in February, 1970, she told Susan that if she died, Daddy would fulfill his promise to Clarence and marry Helen and take care of her.  She told Susan to "be nice and get along."  Our Mother died about six weeks later--from unknown causes. 

Helen and Daddy got married July 4th, 1971.  Daddy, Susan and I never told Helen or her two daughter's that Clarence had known he was dying.  That he asked my Daddy to promise to take care of Helen.  It was a giant secret--but we have kept our word--all these years.

Now it is written here for you all too see.

Susan and I have always said, someday we would tell our step-sisters.  Wouldn't they want to know?  Even if just for medical history knowledge?  After Helen’s death, we decided not to tell her girls.  Helen and her girls have always been protected from bad stuff, so maybe we should keep the tradition going?

Scary Stuff

Tornado just 5 miles west of my kids and sister.


Skipped over a mile north of them.


On the north edge of my home town--2 miles north-east of my family.

Yes--I am still awake--watching the storms on the radar on my computer.  Flint, MI, took a big hit, as did a town east of there--people at a sports banquet in the school's gym--there are some still trapped.

This is all north of me, BUT--at 5:00 a tornado warning came on the TV for this county.  It looked like it was going to stay south of me, so I wasn't too worried.  I called Merle and Pearl--they didn't even know--of course you know Pearl's theory about tornadoes coming here.  There's never been one, so there never will be one.

Then--my friend Bethie called me and told me I was in the middle of it.  Just as I hung up, the tornado siren just 1 mile west of me went off.  It was raining like a s.o.b.  I didn't stand around and see on TV where it actually was.  I got in my car and grabbed Dar who was just getting home from work and drove a mile east to the small hospital--they have a basement.

I parked in the parking lot, near the entrance, facing the south west so I could watch for a funnel.  Turned on the local station to listen.  Pretty soon, a few more cars arrived from my park.  I heard on the radio that it was headed right down M-36--where Karen and her family lives--so I quickly called her cell.  She was on her way home!!!  Her hubby and Maddy were home so she called them.  That funnel never came down to touch the ground--thank goodness.

We sat and chatted with the other people in the cars and pretty soon, the rain stopped and the clouds cleared and Dar and I came home.

I was most probably in more danger driving in the torrential rain and flooded road, then if I had stayed here.  Now I will have to endear Pearl's teasing, but...............rather safe then sorry.

The thing is--that damn siren goes off if there is a funnel or tornado in the entire county!!!  I wish we had one just for this area--that storm was about 15 miles south of me.  The later one that went near my little sister's, about 20 miles north of me!!

Bethie was so concerned about me--the later storm went very near her home, by the looks of the radar!!!

Tomorrow morning, I've got to call and see if everyone is okay!!!

We still have a long train of storms coming in--clear back to Kansas--tonight and tomorrow.  Storm all the rest of the week.  As far as I can tell, it looks like the worse of it will remain north of me--Lansing, on over my sister's head and into Flint.  She is probably sleeping like a log!!!!  and here I am, still awake with my eyes crossing from tiredness!!!







Monday, May 27, 2013

Memorial Day

I looked out my front windows this morning at 8:15 a.m. and this is what I saw.  It kind of creeped me out.


I have never seen a sky like this in my life.
Sort of light on top and that grey area underneath, 
but so defined...straight across.
It almost looked like a hill or mountain range 
behind the trees.

I tried to call Pearl and Dar and Jackie to look out their west windows and see this, but they didn't answer their phones.
I wondered, "What in the world is coming at me!"  Is it a Wall Cloud?  


Half an hour later--it started to break up.




15 minutes later


and now--just going to be a cloudy, cool day.

I won't say Happy Memorial Day because, I don't see how any "memorial" day can be "happy".  

When I was a kid, we called it Decoration Day.  It was on the 30th of May.  We went to the cemeteries where our ancestors were buried, we cleaned and scrubbed off the grave markers and planted flowers. 

My grandmother was the sexton for "our" cemetery, so it was my job to help her get flags on every soldiers grave.  We didn't have the little brass flag holders back then--grandma knew every person that was buried in that cemetery--we'd start at the north end and she would point out the graves and I would carefully push a flag in front of the marker.

"There's the Horcha boy.  Oh, I remember when he went off to the war.  He was such a nice young man.  Terrible...just terrible."  On we'd go--she remembered every person from World War II on.

The flags were only left up that day and the next.  In respect to the flag and country, we went back in the late afternoon of May 31st and took them off the graves and carefully put them away.

When I got older--high school--I marched in the parade in our town.  I was in the band.  We'd gather at the high school and get in line.  There were the old vets who marched in front of us.  Their uniforms strained across their now ample stomachs.  They stood so proud as they carried the flag and their rifles.

Little kids rode behind us with their decorated bikes and--the horses and riders came last--so the rest of us didn't have to watch for horse patties along the way, LOL.

Of course, there were the local fire engines and one or two floats, pulled by a John Deere or Farmall tractor.

We'd march downtown--there was a bandstand where we put on a concert with appropriate military music--The Star Spangled Banner first and then ending with Stars and Stripes Forever.  In between songs, there was honoring of vets in the crowd--each one getting a red carnation pinned on their shirt. Prayers by the two town ministers.  Every single one of us in that crowd--even the little kids, knew what this day was all about.

Then, down through the rest of town to the cemetery.  No playing in the cemetery--the drums were muffled just to keep the beat for our, right, left.  Right, left.  The crowd was quiet!

We'd stop at a monument in honor of the army, marines and then on down to the millpond.  The soldiers lined up facing the water and shot off a three gun salute to the navy--the WRC women threw flower wreaths out onto the water.  I usually had both ears plugged with my fingers while this was going on.

Up on the hill, my friend Bethie played taps on her trumpet. It always gave me goose bumps.  Then we marched out of the cemetery--muffled drums, until we got out of the gate, and then a regular nice loud cadence and playing of marching songs back to the high school.

It sometimes rained a bit at the beginning of the parade, then the sun came out--nice and hot.  We had wool band uniforms at the time and they got wet then hot and itchy, when the sun dried them.

There usually was a baseball game after the parade.  The alumni against the high school team.  A couple of years, my boyfriend was pitching for the high school team and my Daddy was pitching for the alumni.  I didn't know who to root for.

Then home for a late afternoon hot dog roast.  One year, my uncle who sold eggs and chickens to a market in the Big City, got a watermelon from that market.  The first watermelon of the year--it was a big deal, let me tell you.

All this in a town that had around 600 population.  

They still have the parade.  It always gives me a thrill to look up the street and see the soldiers and the marching band coming over the hill.

My hometown--Byron, Michigan.  Small town USA!

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Did you know this day wasn't officially called Memorial Day until the mid '60's and wasn't on the last Monday in May until 1971?  The unions pushed for that so their workers could get a nice three-day weekend.

Don't forget.