Paranoia Will Destroya

Pammie called me yesterday to see if I was going to be home.

"Yeah--what time are you stopping in?"

"Around two--two-thirty.  I'm going down to Karen's.  Jen is meeting us there."

"Okay--see ya.  Bye"
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Why are they getting together?
Why wasn't I invited?
The woman who gave them life, even when they made their early presence known at an inconvenient time.  A woman who didn't believe in abortion, or Pam and Jennifer wouldn't have existed!!

Getting together to make out a plan on where to put Mom?  Which nursing home would Mom's money pay for so they didn't have to chip in?

Getting together with Jennifer to talk over her problems?  Wouldn't want Mom around, even though she knows all our secrets.  Secrets that we don't even know about each other.

Going out to supper?  Wouldn't want Mom around.  We might order a beer or a glass of wine and she'd give us "that look"
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So Pam arrived at 2:45, explaining that she was trying to quickly finish a book Karen had given her and, "So sorry I'm late.  I have to hurry."

"So...you're going to Karen's.  And Jennifer is joining you?"

"Yeah.  Eric and all the kids are in New Jersey, so Jen has a chance to get with us."

"Oh.  I thought maybe you were all getting together to plan which nursing home you want to put me in."

"Nope.  That's next week."
<she has her mother's sarcastic wit>

"Going to a movie together?  Supper?"

"Nope.  We are going down to the Ann Arbor Art Fair.  We haven't been in fifteen years.  That was the last time all of us got to go together."

"Oh!  That's wonderful!!!  I love it when you three get a chance to be together and do something fun!"

"Yeah.  Do you want us to get you anything from there?"

"Oh Sweetheart.  How nice of you to ask.  Nope.  I don't need anything."
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Okay--I gotta get going.  I wanted to drop off this crochet pattern to you.  I don't ever crochet baby things and I know you do."

"Thanks Honey.  How is everything going with Jen and Eric and the move?"

"I don't really know.  I try and stay out of all of it.  I'm just there for the kids."

"Do they really want to move?  I don't think Jennifer wants to."

"I don't think Eric does either and probably, this week working with his father will just reinforce that knowledge."

"Why don't they just stay here, Jennifer has wonderful opportunities, they can sell and get a smaller place--like Karen's.  It would be plenty big enough and cost about half as much to buy and maintain."

"I know Mom.  Jennifer just doesn't want to work so many hours.  Eric is perfectly capable of finding other work in Lansing, or Detroit.  He just keeps putting it off and keeping his whole family in limbo."

"Hm-mm.  That's not good."

"Nope.  He just keeps dinking around the yard or the house and there really isn't any more to do.  If it rains, he just sits inside and watches TV. Jennifer works to support all of them!"

"Geez."

"Eric needs to get off his ass and go out and find a job!"

<I love how Pammie is so bluntly honest!!>

"Okay Sweetheart.  See ya later."

"Sorry I couldn't stay and talk more.  I love you, Momma.  Bye."
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I saw this photo posted later on Face Book and I must admit, I felt a bit hurt that I was not asked to join them.  EVEN THOUGH I KNOW, I could not have walked as far or as much as they did at the art fair.  Still.....................

The Book

Click on the photos to see better

The tree on the cover of my family story book stands just west of the house where my sister now lives.  We always called it the Walts Family Tree.  A giant Oak--the oldest in the township, over 250 years old.  I found the saying under it on-line and I thought it was perfect.  Thankfully, we have many pictures of this fine tree because an ice storm in 2013, took half of it down and a high wind storm in 2014 took down the rest.  It was a sad for all of us, to see that tree gone.

 My introduction page

 Starting out with the oldest ancestor on my Father's side of the family and a map from where they lived..

The county they settled in New York--plus on the right, their names and their children with our direct ancestor designated by a *

A township  map showing their farms

Pictures and the story of the ones who moved to Michigan and bought the farm where Susan now lives.

and of course photos of then and now--

 Of course, I traced back the women in my family and that is how I found out we are related to Thorton Wilder and Almonzo Wilder (Laura Ingalls Wilder)

 and I made notations in italics--like these---

and to write about what was happening in the world at times in our lives

 and things that happened on the farm

and of course, headstones--just in case, 75 years from now, some great, great grandchild wants to go visit.

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I wanted to do this because, even though Susan remembers our great grandmother, she was 4 when Sophia died.  I am the last remaining descendant to remember the "elders" and the stories they told me about their younger lives. To remember out parents when they were young and hear the stories my Mother told me of their dating and early married years.

 I wanted my kids and grand kids to have those family stories and not just the factual dates; of birth, death and where they settled.

Now--if I can just live long enough to get this put together and give it at Christmas--I will have accomplished what I intended.

What Day Is It?

Who am I?  Where am I?

How could I forget Monday?

It was a pretty quiet morning.  Then I went to the Chirocracker's--got a massage and the tapper up and down my spine and shoulder and walked out feeling great.

Oh yes--I remember now.  I stopped at Staples to get some more special paper for my family tree/story book I am giving to my kids for Christmas.  The first box I bought in March, was $20.00 for 150 sheets.  Must have been a half-price sale back then because yesterday, it was $39.95 for the same.

YIKES!!!

I wanted this to look like a book--or a magazine.  I don't want to use a 3-ring binder.  I want it to look more like a book.  With sort of shiny paper--the kind used for brochures.

I thought these binders would work.  Holds 200 pages.  I have about 100-front and back

 After I printed out my test copy, it was easy to use a two-hole punch and put it all together.  You gotta start with the back pages first.

I thought it looked nice

But--way way into the book, the pages won't lay flat and when I forced them, the metal tabs that hold the pages together, started to twist and deform.

The paper is wonderful.  The print quality, even with an inkjet, is super.  I can print on both sides and it doesn't bleed through.  

So, I need one of these machines: Comb Binding

So I can punch those rectangular holes along the side to make a book like this with a spiral 

only a clear cover, so it will open and lay flat like this.

Then, I could use that machine to make my How To book and another one I want to make of all the children's stories I wrote, which were on my website, which is now closed.

By the time I get done with my family book, it probably is going to cost me $100.00 a book!!  Which I could have paid to have it printed and bound by a professional company, HOWEVER--I have looong (17-24") family pedigree sheets that I figured out to make in Excel and need to go into the book, hooked in the book at different places and be able to unfold them. lengthwise to see them.

Yesterday, I took those pedigree sheets that I had printed, cut and pasted together to Staples to have them enlarge or downsize to a WIDTH of 11 inches to fit along the spine of the book, and whatever length needed to get all the names and dates onto.

$2.00 a copy and I want 7.  One for each book (4), one for my sister, her son and myself.  I have four sheets to print out.  What is 4 x 7?  $28.00.  What is $28.00 x $2.00?  $56.00  YIKES!!

 GOOD GRIEF!!

So I thought and thought and tried to figure out.  I don't need to print and put them together until late November, so I have time to get the money and buy a box of paper once a month and the folders and the machine and the plastic spirals used for the spine.

At least I have the book all finished and it turned out WUNDERBAR!!!

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But today, this Precious Girl showed up and spent 3 hours here and I didn't even think about the book.

We had a great talk and yes, we talked about Luis Fillipe and I told her about Richard Spencer Dunham and about aunt Jennifer's Miguel, in Spain, and how these, away from home for the first time, summer romances can be so wonderful, but sometimes, don't turn into lifelong relationships and she is a leveled headed girl and already knows all that, but........."Gramma, I wasn't looking, really.  I was there on a mission for God and I didn't want to meet any boys, but...he is so nice and sweet and he writes songs and plays his guitar so beautifully in church and his voice is so mellow, and smooth, 

and ......................................"

Oh to be young........

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This child loves me no matter what:

"I've missed Gramma's house!"

"I love you so much, Gramma."

"I love the way you have decorated your house."

"You've always been so wonderful to me."

"You always understand everything."

on and on................

My heart is filled up to the brim and overflowing!  

I am to my grandchildren, like my grandma was to me.  I don't discipline.  I never give advice, unless they ask.  I take their side always, no matter what.  I am their biggest advocate and they know how much I adore them and think they are the bestest people I have ever known!!

I admit, it is easier when they are nice, polite, level headed kids and none have ever been in trouble (yet).  If they ever DO get into trouble, I will still be their advocate--no matter what!

Some People Are Out of Their Minds!

On July 7 the Memphis City Council voted unanimously to exhume the body of Confederate General Nathan Bedford Forrest from its 110 year resting place and move it to another location.

The body of Forrest’s wife will be exhumed as well.

According to Local Memphis, the council voted to exhume Forrest’s remains from Health Sciences Park on Union Avenue. They plan to sell a statue of Forrest as well–they are thinking of “selling the statue to anyone who wants it.”

Anyone want to buy a statue?

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In an attempt to rid our country of anything that smacks of racism against Blacks, I guess we need to blow up Mount Rushmore?  Implode the Washington Monument?  Tear down the Jefferson Memorial?   Go to Gettysburg and tear down any signs that tell of a Confederate victory?

Remove and burn any "Gone With The Wind" books or DVD's in every library?   (I heard that someone actually wants to do this.)

Meanwhile, there is a "challenge" on Face Book for Blacks to post pictures of themselves wiping their bottoms with the American flag.  I won't post any of those photos because they truly are disgusting.
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My ancestor's came to America, some at a very young age--leaving their parents and family behind. When they got here, some were indentured servants or farm workers--working hard for other,  rich people. Life was not easy, but they realized that America was the place to be to have a better life.   I do believe my ancestor would have been overjoyed to have been given, "40 acres and a mule", back in 1865.  

Instead, he had to work off his debt and then start to find a way to make his own living.  So he went to work for someone who would pay him.  Little by little.  Inch by inch--they all found their way and ended up being land barons in their own right.

Maybe some descendants of people from Africa could be happy that their ancestor's ended up in America too? Look at the lives they have now--good paying jobs in the factories--lawyers, doctors, educators. Yes, many were brought here against their will, and many were trapped by the "catchers", people in their own tribe, and sold to the slave ship owners.

The early Chinese, who worked so hard to build our railroads.  Some of them were brought here by captors, treated like animals and yet, by their ingenuity, they were the only ones who figured out how to get tunnels through the mountains, using only pick-axes and shovels. 

What about the Japanese who were put into the internment camps. While they were held captive, they couldn't pay the property taxes on their land in Napa Valley, so the government took their land, and they had to start all over again. 

The Irish, the Italians, the Jews--all were scorned, beaten and hanged because of their race. 

I do not hear any of them whining about their mistreatment. Most of them are thriving.  

That was a long time ago.  Can't the descendants put all that anger away and be grateful that they are here now?

You can be a slave, no matter what color you are. IF it is in your will to make a better life for the next generation, you can do it--even if you are beaten down, time and time again. Racism isn't only directed toward Blacks.
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In my opinion, American owes nothing to any race, except the Native Americans.  We came onto their Continent and kept pushing them further and further west.  Our government made treaties with them and then broke those treaties when we wanted to expand further west.  

Then we "gave" them acres of land for their own.  Land where you couldn't hardly grow a weed, let alone anything decent to eat.  We killed their food supply and we forced their children to learn the white way and tried to take their native ways from them.  

They too have survived.  They figured out how to beat the government.  Their land, given to them, is Tribal land, governed by them, not State or Federal Law. They have their own council and their own police force.  Now their Casinos bring in a good profit to help the Tribes.  

I've never been a bigot in my life, but when I see the disrespect, the continual whining, the killings of Black on Black, AND the total disregard (from the higher ups) when a White person is killed by a Black--well let's just say, I am becoming very angry.

I blame the man in the White House and his cronies.  He/they had an opportunity to bring us all together, in unity because we are all Americans, and he/they chose to make everything worse.  You keep on telling a people how under privileged they are and they are going to act that way.  Keep telling them that America "owes" them and they will believe it.  Keep telling them they are treated unfairly, and you are going to incite them to protests and riots.

Every race needs to be empowered, but not at the expense of any other race.  

Just because some mentally, deranged kid decided to wrap himself in the Stars and Bars and kill innocent people?  Tearing down flags, digging up corpses, isn't going to change a thing!

It Is As It Is

Coincidence?

ITEM: The New York City subway system suffered an atrocious commute today, with some trains being inexplicably stranded in stations for long periods of time.

ITEM: The website “The Dissolve” folded today.

ITEM: United Airlines was forced to ground all of its flights after its computer system mysteriously stopped working.

ITEM: The New York Stock Exchange suspended trading today after its computerized trading system mysteriously stopped working.

ITEM: Immediately after, the Wall Street Journal’s website mysteriously stopped working.

ITEM: More than 2,500 people in Washington, DC mysteriously lost power.

Hm-mmm

Perhaps a test run by the Chinese hackers to see just how much panic and damage it would cause/

A wake-up call for our cyber-security people to take this problem seriously?

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During all this, the financial-economical systems in China and Greece or not only in the toilet, but the flush handle is about to be pushed.  

Now that our government is about to downsize our military and our military's budget, the soon to be top guy in the War Department stated today, "Our biggest threats come from Russia, China, North Korea and ISIS."

Two Russian bombers flew into USA air space, over the past weekend.  Our allies no longer respect us and our enemies no longer fear us.

If we ordinary citizens think none of this will affect us--we aren't paying very close attention.

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I had a wonderful thing happen to me this morning.  Something that directly affects me at this time--I got a call from a lady at the hospital who has  been working with my welfare case worker.  She told me that my hospital bill ($675.00), my ambulance bill ($219.00) and my attending doctor bill ($238.00) were all being paid from the St. Joseph Mercy Hospital's McCauly Fund for low income people.

Both of these ladies are so very sweet to me when I talk to them on the phone.  They don't act like they are over worked or rushed, but I know they both are.  There is no note of condemnation in their voices that I am on welfare.  In fact today, the lady from the McCauly Fund said, "I have talked to Karen, your case worker a few times.  We want to make this happen for you because you are a nice person.  You don't try to defraud, like some people do.  It is not any of your fault that you find yourself in this position.  We see quite a few women your age.  You stayed home to raise your children and didn't have a career in the workforce and receive no retirement pension.  You are divorced and receive no pension or help from your ex husband.  We are here to help keep you going."

I wept.  I thanked her profusely.  After she hung up, I laid my forehead on the desk and I thanked God. This afternoon, I made two thank-you cards which I will mail to each of these ladies.

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At 11:30, I drove up the short distance to Gleaner's Food Bank.  There wasn't too much, but I found two ears of kind of dried up Sweet Corn--10 minutes in a steam bath and it should be tender enough to eat for supper.  I found a bag of cut up salad greens and a bag of chicken, washed it, drained it and a cucumber sliced in it with some Catalina dressing and that was my very, tasty lunch.  I also found a small chuck roast, some potatoes, carrots and onion which I will cook in my Crock-Pot.  I found a half-gallon of milk, some Croissants, which I use for my sandwiches, a dozen eggs, Grape Jelly & Peanut butter (we are allowed one of each) 1# sugar, jug of detergent and package of bathroom tissue and some Lady Fingers that I can put raspberry jam on for a nice dessert.

Outside I found the young man and his two small children, who were ahead of me in line, and I gave him my bathroom tissue, sugar and the grape jelly and peanut butter.

Pay it forward in whatever way I can.

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Hump Day

What did I do today?

Nary a thing.  

I also did not do any "humping" on Hump Day.  I'm sure you are all glad you don't have to read about that!!!

80 degrees and so humid yesterday, I stayed inside all morning with the A/C on.

This morning, 54 degrees and gray.  I stayed inside all morning with the furnace on.

Rainy tomorrow.

We are having the strangest summer ever, here in the Mitten.  I feel kind of sorry for people with backyard pools (well, not really, just trying to be nice), as it's been too cool to use them and here it is--nearly mid July when it is usually pretty hot and sunny.

Weird.  Can't say as it bothers me a whit because I do prefer cool weather!!  

I saw John walk by early this morning and although Maisey the Dog stopped at the end of my parking pad, I didn't go out.  I had just got out of the shower and was still in my thin nightie.

Dar came over this evening and she was so calm and quiet, I could hardly hear her when she talked.  She actually asked me several questions and then, sat and listened to my responses.  I wondered if she was on a new tranquilizer.  Nope.  She started taking Melatonin at night, is sleeping well and "it seems to keep me relaxed all day."

This is good!

Oh yes--I did vacuum today and fill bird feeders and went up to Subway to get my supper.

I am the laziest person I know!!!